Free Republic

https://babylonbee.com/news/schrdingers-neighbors-say-thought-experiment-very-interesting-but-they-would-really-just-like-a-straight-answer-on-where-their-cat-isVIENNA, AUSTRIA — Neighbors of physicist Erwin Schrödinger agreed that his thought experiment about the indeterminate nature of their cat being alive was super interesting and all, but asked if he could please tell them where their cat is. "I think Erwin is great, he's so smart and always telling us about the amazing experiments he's working on, but he asked to borrow our cat a while back and I'm a bit concerned what happened next," said neighbor Fritz Weinberger. "We'd really like to know where Herr Shnitzel-Muncher ended up." Schrödinger reportedly asked to borrow the large tabby cat to...

A new poll on Tuesday shows Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton with a slight lead over Texas Senator John Cornyn, who currently holds the seat, in the primary race for Senate. "The recent poll indicating Paxton leading Cornyn by five points in the Texas GOP Senate primary reflects Paxton's strong appeal among Trump loyalists, bolstered by his 2023 impeachment acquittal and alignment with MAGA priorities," political analyst Craig Agranoff told Newsweek via text message on Tuesday, in part.

Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton has asked a state court clear the way for law enforcement officials to arrest Democrat Robert Francis “Beto” O’Rourke for allegedly violating a court order barring him from fundraising for the statehouse Democrats who fled Texas to delay the redistricting process for U.S. congressional seats in the state. Paxton has filed a motion for contempt in court against O’Rourke, alleging that he violated a Tarrant County, Texas, judge’s order and therefore is subject to a fine of up to $500 and jail time of up to six months behind bars. “Beto told me ‘to come...