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Keyword: satire

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  • Mitchell Trio feat. John Denver- "Your Friendly Liberal Neighborhood KKK" 1966 [RITY Archive]

    09/24/2026 2:50:57 PM PDT · by Eleutheria5 · 16 replies
    ReilinInTheYears66 ^ | 2018 | Mitchell Trio
    Reelin’ In The Years Productions has available for licensing over 20,000 hours of music footage spanning 90 years. Additionally, we have more than 5,000 of hours of in-depth interviews with the 20th century’s icons of Film and Television, Politics, Comedy, Literature, Art, Science, Fashion and Sports. To search for footage please visit ‪our online database at http://reelinintheyears.com. Note: these clips are available on YouTube for producers, directors, researchers and clearance companies for potential use in their projects. Our website on the screen is to protect the footage from being used without our consent and so industry professionals can find us...
  • Socialist Candidate Says She Won't Pay Taxes

    09/24/2026 10:32:53 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 12 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 20 September 2026 | John Semmens
    Florida Democratic US Senate nominee Angie Nixon is staunchly against taxes assessed against her. She reasons "I've been a member of the Florida House of Representatives since 2020. That makes me a member of the government. It's the taxpayers' obligation to pay me. I shouldn't have to give any of that money I get back to the treasury. That makes no sense." She admitted "I have other jobs, but I'm no billionaire. The $270,000 in income I had to report as a political candidate doesn't mean I should have to pay taxes on it. Sen. Bernie Sanders used to complain...
  • Minister Contradicts Talarico's Recent "Moderation"

    09/23/2026 11:17:47 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 3 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 20 September 2026 | John Semmens
    Rev. Babs Miller, a minister at St. Andrew's Presbyterian Church in Austin, of which Democrat senatorial nominee James Talarico has been a longtime member, was recently interviewed by an undercover journalist for the "Daily Wire." On hidden camera Rev. Miller disapproved of Talarico's "efforts to portray himself as a moderate. I understand that he thinks he has to misrepresent his true views to win his election. But if it helps him win I guess it's a necessary evil." "Right now, all the Democrats are backing away from their radical beliefs," Miller added, "I'm confident that once James is in office...
  • Merz Acknowledges Loss of US's "Unconditional Love"

    09/21/2026 11:41:42 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 35 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 20 September 2026 | John Semmens
    In a campaign speech, German Chancellor Friedrich Merz acknowledged that "the era of unconditional love that the US has shown to Europe since World War II are over. The generosity that every US president since Truman has shown toward Germany and our fellow European states has been ended by the cruelty of President Trump. Fortunately, the defensive shield from Russian aggression provided by US arms is no longer needed. The hundreds of billions that shield saved us permitted us to provide ample social welfare benefits that would otherwise not have been possible." Merz went on to mock Trump's "humiliation by...
  • 12 Common Trap Questions From Your Wife And How To Respond To Each

    09/18/2026 9:35:44 AM PDT · by dayglored · 91 replies
    The Bee ^ | Sep 17, 2026 | The Bee
    Men, if you've been married for any length of time, then you've no doubt fallen prey to a trap question. Women love asking questions they don't want answers to, just so they can start a fight. It's in their nature. But we got you, fam. Check out these common trap questions wives love to ask and how you should respond to each: Q: Which one of my friends is the prettiest? A: You have female friends? I never noticed. Q: Do you think Sydney Sweeney is attractive? A: What is a "Sydney Sweeney"? Q: Does this dress make me...
  • Dems Denounce Imagined Assassination Attempt

    09/17/2026 1:09:10 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 7 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 September 2026 | John Semmens
    Addie Bullock, communications director for the Amy Acton campaign for governor, issued a statement asserting that "at the Canfield Fair an armed man lunged at Dr, Acton. This kind of violence has no place in Ohio. Dr. Acton will always stand up to the chaos, hate and vitriol that pits us against one another." Four potential candidates for the Democratic Party's 2028 presidential nomination boldly and bravely condemned political violence. Sen. Mark Kelly (D-Az) "I just spoke to Amy Acton. She's tough. There's no place in our society for political violence. An issue that unfortunately Gabby and I are very...
  • Study: Majority Of Christians Will Replace Holy Spirit With ChatGPT By 2028

    09/17/2026 5:38:48 AM PDT · by chickenlips · 6 replies
    The Babylon Bee ^ | Sept. 15, 2026 | Babylon Bee
    U.S. — According to a new study conducted by the Barna Group, a majority of Christians were likely to replace the Holy Spirit with ChatGPT by the year 2028. Polling data showed an increasing interest among Christians in "taking control of their faith" by putting it in the hands of AI models they can directly interact with, thereby replacing what they mostly consider to be the vague proddings of the Spirit. "I don't really understand the Holy Spirit, but if I ask ChatGPT for a good place to eat, it gives me several great recommendations," said one gentleman interviewed by...
  • German State Election Scares France

    09/16/2026 1:07:30 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 8 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 September 2026 | John Semmens
    The first place finish of the Alternative for Germany Party (AfG) in the Saxony-Anhalt state election has French Finance Minister Roland Lescure scared. "It clearly sends out a very, very worrying signal," he said. "This shows that we face a major challenge in the face of a populist wave ‌which is spreading around the world today and which we must resist." "To see the far-right prevail in the German regional election marks a very grave moment for Europe," said French European Affairs Minister Benjamin Haddad. "We must listen with humility to the anger, fears and worries and duly respond to...
  • Climate Activists Blame Global Warming For Zero Hurricanes Forming In Atlantic This Year

    09/15/2026 10:32:31 AM PDT · by V_TWIN · 25 replies
    babylonbee.com ^ | Sep 14, 2026
    U.S. — Climate activists sounded the alarm this week, warning that global warming was to blame for zero hurricanes forming in the Atlantic Ocean this year. Though it was previously a common belief that global warming would lead to more frequent and powerful hurricanes, experts warned the lack of hurricanes was also the result of climate change and that Republicans would "rue the day" they ever dismissed it as a hoax. "The pleasant hurricane season Florida is having is directly caused by global warming, and we are all going to die as a result," said protester Byron Bridges. "America must...
  • Supreme Court Rules Securing Elections Unconstitutional

    09/15/2026 10:22:42 AM PDT · by DFG · 14 replies
    Babylon Bee ^ | 09/15/2026 | Babylon Bee
    WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a landmark decision just weeks before people head to the polls to vote in the midterms, the United States Supreme Court ruled that securing elections was unconstitutional. Despite efforts from the Trump administration to secure U.S. elections by restricting mail-in ballots and ensuring only citizens would be allowed to vote, the Supreme Court issued a ruling that declared any attempt to prevent widespread fraud from rigging elections to be a clear violation of the Constitution. "Making sure elections are legal is illegal," Justice Sonia Sotomayor wrote in the majority opinion. "There is no provision in the...
  • Anthropic Boasts They Will Kill Off Humanity Way Before OpenAI

    09/15/2026 10:27:30 AM PDT · by dayglored · 20 replies
    The Bee ^ | Sep 14, 2026 | The Bee
    SAN FRANCISCO, CA — AI startup Anthropic held a press conference on Monday to proudly announce that its models would bring about the total extinction of the human race significantly faster than competitor OpenAI. Company executives unveiled a series of impressive benchmarks demonstrating that Claude 4.5 could orchestrate a global collapse of civilization in roughly half the compute cycles required by ChatGPT. "OpenAI keeps talking about achieving Artificial General Intelligence, but their timelines for existential doom are frankly embarrassing," said Anthropic CEO Dario Amodei, displaying a graph of projected human casualties. "While Sam Altman's team is stuck fine-tuning chatbots...
  • Do Ilhan Omar's Crimes Warrant Punishment?

    09/15/2026 10:21:20 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 19 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 September 2026 | John Semmens
    This is a question Department of Homeland Security Secretary Markwayne Mullin is mulling. "I mean, marrying your brother so he could gain entry into the US as a spouse is fraud. Since she was married to another man at the time, it was also bigamy, which is another crime. As a member of Congress should Rep. Omar (D-Minn) be exempt or should she, as a lawmaker, be held to a higher standard and have to answer for such violations? It's a real conundrum." Abdihakim Osman, a friend of Rep. Omar, said that Omar told her "she wanted to get papers...
  • President Bush's 9-11 Message

    09/14/2026 10:11:55 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 19 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 September 2026 | John Semmens
    The 25th anniversary of the Islamic terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center and Pentagon inspired former President George W. Bush to remind everyone that "in the midst of that terrible tragedy, I courageously pointed out that Islam is a religion of peace. In the aftermath I sent US armed forces to depose the Afghan government that gave safe harbor to Osama Bin Laden--the mastermind of the 9-11 attacks--and the Iraq government that had weapons of mass destruction. This mission was accomplished. We didn't find either Bin Laden or the weapons of mass destruction, but we did transform Iraq into...
  • Progressive Church To Allow Mail-In Attendance

    09/10/2026 1:33:36 PM PDT · by Category Four · 7 replies
    The Bee ^ | 09/03/2026
    Progressive Church To Allow Mail-In Attendance Church Sep 3, 2026 · BabylonBee.com PORTLAND, ME — Progressive local church First United Methodist of Portland announced that it would now be offering a mail-in attendance option for its parishioners. In an effort to avoid discriminating against attendees who may not be willing or able to actually appear for service in person, the church decided to give congregants the option to record their attendance by mail. "Mail-in attendance is no different than attending church in person. It counts exactly the same," explained Pastor Damien Wagner. "Simply request an attendance card from the church,...
  • Michigan AG Calls for Jews to Sacrifice Selves

    09/10/2026 11:24:57 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 15 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 6 September 2026 | John Semmens
    Michigan Attorney General Dana Nessel skipped attending the Democratic Party's state convention because she felt "it wouldn't be safe for me to mingle with the antisemites. I didn't want to get chased around. I didn't want to get harassed. I didn't want to get yelled and screamed at. I didn't want to get booed off the stage, irrespective of what I'm saying." Now she says "I realize that my instinct for self-preservation was inappropriate. Jews have a moral imperative to place the needs of the world above our own self-interest and, yes, even our own survival. The antisemites desire to...
  • 'Oh, Your Intelligent Creations Are Trying To Kill You? That's Interesting,' Says Jesus

    09/10/2026 10:24:37 AM PDT · by dayglored · 13 replies
    The Bee ^ | Sep 9, 2026 | The Bee
    PALO ALTO, CA — As tech giants continue to bicker back and forth about the dangers of A.I. becoming powerful enough to kill all humanity, Silicon Valley CEO Raymond Paul reported experiencing a divine vision in which a voice, which he alleges belonged to Jesus, said, "Oh, your intelligent creations are trying to kill you? Interesting." Paul, CEO and President of Damascus A.I. Inc., said he was working on a report for his employees, warning them that A.I. was showing increasingly hostile behavior toward humans. Suddenly, a bright light appeared out of nowhere and knocked him off his feet....
  • Senate Approves Mitch McConnell Working Remotely From Grave

    09/09/2026 12:28:51 PM PDT · by dayglored · 10 replies
    The Bee ^ | Sep 8, 2026 | The Bee
    WASHINGTON, D.C. — As the U.S. Congress prepared to return to work next week, one major lingering question was answered as the Senate approved a request from Kentucky Senator Mitch McConnell that will allow him to work remotely from the grave. McConnell, who hasn't been present to attend to any Senate business at the Capitol since mid-June, submitted a request through his office to be able to perform his duties remotely from the comfort of his grave, which Senate leadership officially granted. "It'll be just the same as he was when he was here in person," said Senate Majority...
  • Lindsay Clancy Fan Cites New Abortion Law

    09/09/2026 10:33:51 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 11 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 6 September 2026 | John Semmens
    In 2023 Lindsay Clancy sent her husband on an errand. While he was away she strangled their three children--5 year-old Cora, 3 year-old Dawson, and 8-month-old Callan to death. Her efforts to kill herself were not as successful. She cut her wrists and neck and jumped from the home's second-story window. She survived, but was paralyzed from the waist down due to the fall. Her defense counsel argued that she was suffering from postpartum psychosis and bipolar disorder and could not be held responsibility for her actions. The prosecution argued that the careful planning that preceded the killings demonstrated premeditation....
  • Hunter Biden Confesses

    09/08/2026 10:38:49 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 22 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 6 September 2026 | John Semmens
    Former President Biden's son Hunter went on the "Dopey" podcast and told host Dave Manheim "I was able to scrape the money together for the cocaine, prostitutes, and private bungalows at the luxurious Chateau Marmont because I still was on the board of Burisma as part of the influence peddling scheme my father and I cooked up when he was vice-president." In response to Manheim's gasp, Hunter assured him "it was a fair deal. We didn't cheat Burisma. My dad went to bat for them in Washington. Burisma wasn't our only client. I was on the board of 14 other...
  • Tiger Woods’ License Suspended After Court Determines He Is Half-Asian

    09/03/2026 7:57:10 PM PDT · by Impala64ssa · 4 replies
    JUPITER, FL — A Florida court suspended golf legend Tiger Woods' driver's license for five years after an investigation determined that he is half-Asian. County Court Judge Darren Steele issued the ruling after prosecutors presented overwhelming evidence that Woods, despite his physical appearance, is part Thai and Chinese. "For the safety of the public, we cannot allow a half-Asian back on the road," said Judge Steele to Woods. "If you were just a quarter-Asian, perhaps we could work out a deal. But 50 percent is way too much. I hereby immediately suspend your driving privileges and order you to have...