AMBLESIDE, ENGLAND — British authorities have arrested a man calling himself Saint George after he brandished a dangerous bladed weapon at a local dragon, which was merely minding its own business of terrorizing the local populace. According to reports, the winged, fire-breathing dragon took up residence in Windermere, England's largest lake, and began terrorizing the inhabitants of the nearby town of Ambleside. The dragon poisoned the land and demanded first animal and then human sacrifices to appease its wrath. But when someone calling themselves Saint George took up an arming sword to threaten the foul beast, that is when...