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Humor (General/Chat)

Brevity: Headers | « Text »
  • Laura Bush Speech (funny)

    01/24/2021 3:24:57 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 23 replies
    Bing ^ | 1/24/2021 | Laura Bush
    Skip W's intro:)
  • Confessions of a Deprogrammed Trump Supporter (satire)

    01/23/2021 5:37:34 PM PST · by dynachrome · 5 replies ^ | 1-22-21 | Matthew Ehret
    As many people are aware, CNN recently aired a wonderful interview by former Moonie-turned-cult-deprogrammer Steve Hassan giving advice to Americans wishing to deprogram their MAGA-hat wearing loved ones, now that the age of Trump is coming to an end. I was fortunate enough to have read Hassan’s book and had the loving scrub-brush of truth wash my brain of all of its formerly pro-Trump sympathies and can honestly say that I am most certainly better off for having left those old delusions in the past. For one thing, I used to enjoy my right to free speech… but thanks to...
  • Joe Biden: Past President

    01/23/2021 1:47:19 PM PST · by SubMareener · 48 replies
    White House dot Gov ^ | White House Web Site Staff
    Joe Biden is listed on the White House Past Presidents page as the 46th President of the united States.
  • Some Humor for Senior FReepers

    01/23/2021 5:14:47 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 17 replies
    email from friend | 1/23/2021 | unknown
    Subject: On the 8th Day God created Seniors God's Plan for Aging. Most seniors never get enough exercise. In His wisdom God decreed that seniors become forgetful so they would have to search for their glasses, keys, and other things, thus doing more walking. And God looked down and saw that it was good. Then God saw there was another need. In His wisdom He made seniors lose coordination so they would drop things, requiring them to bend, reach, and stretch. And God looked down and saw that it was good. Then God considered the function of bladders and decided...
  • NFL Live Thread: Conference Championships (Boycott Party edition)

    01/22/2021 11:51:04 PM PST · by Impy · 31 replies
    NFL LIVE THREAD Conference ChampionshipsHere are all both of the games you shouldn't watch this week!#2 Buffalo Bills at #1 Kansas City Chiefs #5 Tampa Bay Buccaneers at #1 Green Bay Packers In Memoriam Danny Lee (BENDER2)
  • MIRACLE!: CNN COVID Death Counter Begins Counting Backward

    01/22/2021 8:05:47 PM PST · by BipolarBob · 17 replies
    Babylon Bee ^ | 01/22/2021 | Babylon Bee
    U.S.—In what can only be described as a huge win for the Biden Administration's COVID plan, CNN revealed this week that the total number of COVID deaths is actually going down. "This is really, uh, quite something," said CNN anchor John King as the infamous COVID death counter rapidly ticked downward behind him. "Only a few days into the Biden presidency, and total deaths are already decreasing! We're not sure if it's Biden's brilliant mask mandate or his flawless vaccine delivery execution, but people across the country seem to be rising from their graves at a rapid pace-- over 200,000...
  • Biden Announces New COVID Vaccine Rollout Plan (Satire)

    01/22/2021 3:42:26 PM PST · by RetiredTexasVet · 1 replies
    1/22/21 | RetiredTexasVet
    Today the Biden Administration announced a new COVID vaccine rollout plan. President Biden announced that Hunter Biden would be the Drug and Vaccine Czar overseeing the vaccine rollout citing his vast experience in drug distribution. Hunter announced that he was shunning CVS, Walgreens, Amazon, Walmart, and other major distributors to accelerate the vaccine rollout. Instead, Hunter has contracted with the major drug cartels to distribute the vaccines citing their vast existing distributor experience and capabilities. Since the cartels have existing agreements with local, state and national political representatives, existing structure and management capabilities would not have to be re-invented. Kickbacks...

    01/22/2021 8:41:37 AM PST · by Colonial35 · 36 replies
    Doctor Talib had sex with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it he couldn't. The guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming. But every once in a while he'd hear an internal, reassuring voice that said Talib, don't worry about it. You aren't the first doctor to have sex with one of their patients and you won't be the last. And you're single. Just let it go. But invariably another inner voice would bring him back to reality, whispering Talib, you're a veterinarian.
  • Today's Toons 1/22/21

    01/22/2021 3:51:44 AM PST · by pookie18 · 15 replies
    The Briefing Room ^ | 1/22/21 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • Can Biden Succeed Where Obama Failed? (haha alert)

    01/21/2021 11:46:36 PM PST · by Oshkalaboomboom · 11 replies
    Newsweak ^ | 1/29/2021 | Newsweak International
    Only the cover of the upcoming issue of Newsweek International. I wouldn't waste my time finding any articles or going to the website of this worthless birdcage liner.
  • WFT Ex QB Haskins Explains New Jersey No. 3 With Steelers

    01/21/2021 8:46:53 PM PST · by Enterprise · 5 replies ^ | 1/21/21 | MIKE FISHER
    Washington released Haskins, the 2019 first-round pick out of Ohio State, on Dec. 28, less than 24 hours after he was a mess on the field (with three turnovers) in a loss to the Panthers and worse, was found in violation of pandemic protocols after being caught partying with several people without a mask.
  • The world now is ready for this pizza-making robot made in Seattle

    01/21/2021 8:11:06 PM PST · by dynachrome · 45 replies
    king5 TV ^ | 1-15-21 | Chris Cashman
    Just as the restaurant industry is shifting, Seattle company Picnic believes the world might now be ready for its pizza-making robot. The Picnic Pizza System stole the show at last year's CES technology convention in Las Vegas. The robot wowed convention-goers by quickly rolling out hundreds of customized pizzas, each with different toppings, sizes and even making half-and-half pizzas — all with precision and little food waste. However, in the restaurant industry, there has been a stigma on automation. The coronavirus pandemic may be starting to change that, said Picnic CEO Clayton Wood. “There’s a unique labor problem in that...
  • Biden's Actual Inaguration

    01/21/2021 10:38:16 AM PST · by Yo-Yo · 10 replies
    Freedom Toons YouTube Channel ^ | January 21, 2021 | Freedom Tunes
  • The JB46 sweepstakes

    01/21/2021 10:16:49 AM PST · by Riflema · 16 replies
    Self ^ | 1/21/21 | Self
    Okay, I don't know if anyone else has posted a similar piece, but we need to look ahead, not back. To that end, maybe a sweepstakes on when the following occur under the new regime: Arrest of DJT45 Expulsion and banning from Congress of Cruz, Hawley Official end of COVID-19 pandemic “Unexpected” rise in unemployment “Unexpected” rise in inflation “Unexpected” decline in personal incomes DOW 20,000 DOW 10,000 CCP annexation of Taiwan CCP annexation of Hawaii CCP annexation of Southern California Overseas deployment of “military advisors” Overseas deployment of combat troops Unarmed POC killed by LEO JB46 removed from office...
  • READ: Joe Biden's inaugural address

    01/21/2021 8:48:22 AM PST · by upchuck · 26 replies
    CNN ^ | Jan 20, 2021 | ???
    This is America's day.
  • Airliner Pilot Says Jet Pack Guy Over Los Angeles Looked Just Like This Crazy Drone

    01/21/2021 6:34:07 AM PST · by DUMBGRUNT · 4 replies
    The Drive ^ | 20 Jan 2021 | JOSEPH TREVITHICK
    Months after the first sighting of the jet pack guy over Southern California, we get new insights into the official investigation into the incidents. ohn Greenewald, a vigorous filer of Freedom Of Information Act (FOIA) requests and author, who runs the website The Black Vault, received the documents through the FOIA process and generously shared them with The War Zone. You can read the documents in their entirety over at The Black Vault ...the Chief Test Pilot at Jetpack Aviation, based in Van Nuys, California, who was skeptical of the reported sighting. "He confirmed that they have not flown for...
  • May As Well Turn This Into Sport - Biden 25A Pool

    01/21/2021 4:50:28 AM PST · by RinaseaofDs · 77 replies
    Vanity | 1/21/2021 | RinaseaofDs
    Place your virtual, non-monetary bets! This thread has one purpose: Predict the day in Traitor Zhoas administration that the female triumvirate (Feinstein, Pelosi, Heels-up) manages to remove the Pedophile in Chief from power. Rules: 1. Winner is the one who predicts correctly the day the VP takes the oath. 2. Winner is the one who predicts correctly the first day removal is mentioned in the criminal media (FoxNBC, etc). 3. Winner is the one who predicts correctly the day the Cabinet concludes Traitor Zhoa is no longer fit to be President. So there are three winners possible. One could probably...
  • Today's Toons 1/21/21

    01/21/2021 3:45:46 AM PST · by pookie18 · 27 replies
    The Right Reasons ^ | 1/21/21 | pookie18
    Click on link
  • A Fine Old Man

    01/20/2021 6:52:16 PM PST · by dynachrome · 5 replies
    American ^ | 1800s? | Mark Twain
    John Wagner, the oldest man in Buffalo--one hundred and four years old --recently walked a mile and a half in two weeks. He is as cheerful and bright as any of these other old men that charge around so persistently and tiresomely in the newspapers, and in every way as remarkable. Last November he walked five blocks in a rainstorm, without any shelter but an umbrella, and cast his vote for Grant, remarking that he had voted for forty-seven presidents--which was a lie. His "second crop" of rich brown hair arrived from New York yesterday, and he has a new...
  • Another email from Resident Bidet

    01/20/2021 6:10:50 PM PST · by dynachrome · 33 replies
    me again ^ | 1-20-21 | me
    FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE January 20, 2020 ACCEPTANCE ON BEHALF OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA I, Joseph R. Biden Jr., President of the United States of America, having seen and considered the Paris Agreement, done at Paris on December 12, 2015, do hereby accept the said Agreement and every article and clause thereof on behalf of the United States of America. Done at Washington this 20th day of January, 2021. JOSEPH R. BIDEN JR.