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Click on the link. This is funny as hell.

45 minutes to go. If there is already a live debate thread go ahead and delete this. I understand posting a live thread has become a somewhat of a political ordeal here, when it shouldn't be. So to take the pressure off, I'm posting this anyway. Do I dare? LOL!

September 16, 2004 -- BIZARRELY, John Kerry is now clutching onto the document-challenged Dan Rather like a drowning man grabbing onto a sinking ship. Ask outside Democratic strategists, and they all say it makes zero sense for Kerry allies to piggyback on the Rather attacks against Bush's National Guard service now that the anchor's credibility is melting like the Wicked Witch of the West.

Kerry speaks at a press op described as "Keeping America's Families Safe/Fighting Against Crime" at the Thurgood Marshall Center in Washington, DC. In his brief appearance, Kerry shows us the studied finger on the nose, the salute, the point, and the rise-up hands. Facial expressions include the lip-bite, the phony smile, the look of concern and the look of disgust. Kerry is joined pre- and post-speech by Sarah Brady of the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence (Handgun Control, Inc.) Kerry had no other announced events for today. Teresa is back, speacking at the Congressional Hispanic Caucus Institute's Issues...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Posted on Sat, Sep. 11, 2004 MISSING METTLE Bush has the guts that Kerry lacks to take America through these difficult times CONNIE LYNNE CARRILLO DICK WRIGHT/Tribune Media Services DICK WRIGHT/Tribune Media Services Sept. 11, 2001, was an epiphany for President Bush. We witnessed him digging deep, gathering strength and rising to the occasion. He courageously blazed a trail against a terrorist, rogue nation harboring al-Qaida. He rid the world of trigger-happy, homicidal maniac Saddam Hussein and his bloodthirsty dynasty of lunatic successors. Cut-throat Gadhafi is on his back, all fours in the air, begging for mercy. The world...

Where is the outcry about Kerry and the DNC? What about the trail by which these forged memos got to CBS? Here’s what Rush Limbaugh had to say yesterday about the route by which they arrived at CBS: "This story from the Prowler at the American Spectator: "More than six weeks ago, an opposition research staffer for the Democratic National Committee received documents purportedly written by President George W. Bush's Texas Air National Guard squadron commander, the late Colonel Jerry Killian. The opposition researcher claimed the source was a 'retired military officer.' According to a DNC staffer, the documents were...

Since he has a 9/10 mentality, we should honor him today

"Department of Wellness"! Spirit-crushing foolishness from my candidate, John Kerry. The nation is trying to figure out how to fight global terrorism and he's talking about having "not just a Department of Health and Human Services, but a Department of Wellness." How about a Department of F***ing Perspective? If Bush is smart he'll be ridiculing Kerry about this for the rest of the month. ...Thanks, Iowa! P.S.: Was this harmless "Kerrymeandering" or the more ominous "Kerrypandering"?

But Monday's impromptu comments were more damaging. In addition to making a joke in West Virginia about taking a shotgun with him to the presidential debates, Kerry decided it would be a good idea in Pennsylvania to talk about how he has difficulty deciding what to eat at restaurants. "You know when they give you the menu, I'm always struggling, what do you want?" he said. A cook at a local restaurant, though, solves Kerry's dilemma by serving "whatever he's cooked up that day.

Kerry Spot DO I HEAR KERRY PRESS AIDES BANGING THEIR HEADS AGAINST THE WALL? [09/07 03:52 PM] It's moments like this that I really pity the nice men and women working in Kerry's campaign. They put enormous effort into convincing the press and the public that their man isn't indecisive, isn't a waffler, isn't incapable of making the quick, tough decision, and then... Mr. Kerry stepped boldly into the verbal minefield early, arriving at a front-porch session with supporters in Canonsburg, Pa., near Pittsburgh. As he likes to do, he brandished a bit of local color to show he wasn't...

CANONSBURG, Pennsylvania (Reuters) - Democratic presidential nominee John Kerry has called the invasion of Iraq "the wrong war in the wrong place at the wrong time" and said his goal was to withdraw U.S. troops in his first White House term. Under pressure from some Democrats to change the subject from national security -- regarded by many as President George W. Bush's strongest issue -- Kerry tried to focus exclusively on the economy and other domestic topics at a neighbourhood meeting but supporters raised Iraq. The Massachusetts senator, who has said he would have voted to give Bush the authority...

Well, if we can't question John Kerry's patriotism . . . and we can't question his Senate Record . . . and we can't question his knowledge of baseball . . . what can we question? I choose to question his choice of bunny suits. BTW ~ first post here. I'll learn as I go and get better.

NASHVILLE, Tenn. — John Kerry was politely received by the American Legion yesterday, delivering a speech focused on veteran pocketbook issues and President Bush's handling of the war in Iraq without addressing the attacks leveled against him last month by fellow veterans.     "I'm proud to be here, and I'm proud to be a Legionnaire," he said after saluting the several thousand veterans seated in the giant hall. [snip]The audience politely responded to most of Mr. Kerry's pauses for his applause lines and gave him a standing ovation.     It was the candidate's first appearance before a major national veterans group since...

The spitball comment is one of the funniest things I've heard in a long time, and in its context, it was even more powerful. It made me giggle maniacally, but not before my jaw dropped open with disbelief that SOMEONE was actually taking a Democrat to the woodshed for once!It is in the spirit of that pride that I assign homework to our more artisically talented FReepers: We absolutely MUST rub this in the libs' faces. One idea is maybe a "Sergeant Spitball", complete with this pic of course:Or maybe a Clinton tribute... something like "Decision 2004: It's the Spitballs,...

Kerry is making it too easy for us!

Yet another Kerry whopper- delivered by Kerry in 1997 as a eulogy and read by Kerry into the Senate record - to honor the dead? Or to insert a bit of shameless self-promotion? Wonder how the family of the dead sailor feels now that the Swift Vets have provied a truthful version of events? PS: Note that even in 1997 Kerry cannot resist ruminating upon his "proximity" to Cambodia. http://frwebgate.access.gpo.gov/cgi-bin/getpage.cgi?position=all&page=S186&dbname=1998_record

Kerry attends a fundraiser in Seattle and a rally in Tacoma. Today's gestures include the Buddist bow, plenty of full-hand spreads, the point, the size estimate, the salute, and the peace sign. Kerry and Wesley Clark perform a duet point as well.   Democratic presidential nominee Sen. John Kerry, D-Mass., Sen. Patty Murray , D-Wash, and Congreassman [sic] Jim McDermont, D-Wash., left, arrive at a fund raiser in Seattle on Friday, Aug. 27, 2004. (AP Photo/Laura Rauch)   Democratic presidential nominee U.S. Senator John Kerry (D-MA) speaks at a fund-raising event in Seattle, Washington August 27, 2004. Kerry said...

Magical Myth-tery (4 month) TourThe John Kerry Magical Myth-tery (4 month) Tour is unraveling ... 3 citations for the same medal with 3 different signatures, falsified after actions reports, a tall-tale Christmas in Cambodia, self-propelled rice in the fanny, I-forgot-to-duck shrapnel in the arm, etc etc.From shameless re-enactments filmed 'on location' to a flying dog that lands magically on another swift boat, John Kerry's Magical Myth-tery (4-month) Tour proves once again the old adage: If it sounds too good to be true, it is. 

At times, the soundbites go by so fast that an individual line or phrase of a speech gets lost. Today I heard a clip of Kerry at a campaign rally saying, (paraphrasing here), "I'm going to make America great again". My rejoinder to Mr. Kerry is that America IS the greatest country on the planet, and if it isn't, what country is, France?. What follows is my humble attempt at a campaign add...