Unwise people will say to a parent who has had the marrow ripped out of their souls, having a child die on them, "I understand what you're going through." Oh, you understand? -- that you are feeling discomfort at this situation; but if you were my peer, if you also lost a child, you would never say "I understand", you would have the sense to shut your face and say NOTHING, after you own experience of personally having to fend off all the goody-two-shoes "sympathetic" people who are actually morbidly afraid of death and so have to "stim" (self-stimulate) emotionally...