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  • Cookiegate: Tales of John Kerry's Pumpkin Looks and Theresa Heinz the Non-Pumpkin Spice Cookie Cook

    09/29/2004 4:46:38 PM PDT · by adam_az · 2 replies · 1,457+ views
    The Blogspirator ^ | 9/29/04 | The Blogspirator
    Wednesdays WSJ Opinionjournal reports that Theresa Heinz's Pumpkin Spice Cookies are back in the news. Reader Ruth Papazian has a theory about John Kerry's change of color, which we noted yesterday: He's been eating too many of his wife's pumpkin spice cookies. Family Circle sponsored a contest asking readers to bake, then vote on, cookie recipes submitted by Laura Bush (oatmeal-chocolate chunk cookies) and by Teresa Heinz Kerry. and thatOr it may be that Kerry has chosen a Halloween costume that reminds us he by the way served in Vietnam. (Did you know?) That is to say, perhaps he's supposed...
  • MAN FROM MASS. IS A SLOUCH, EVEN IF HE DOES STAND TALL

    09/29/2004 11:33:04 PM PDT · by kattracks · 15 replies · 903+ views
    New York Post ^ | 9/30/04 | DEBORAH ORIN
    September 30, 2004 -- MIAMI — As Democrat John Kerry tries to distract attention from his new orangey tan, he's angling to play the height card — "I'm taller" — as voters get their first chance to size up the presidential candidates on the same stage at tonight's debate. But someone should tell Kerry to watch his posture and stand tall. He tends to slouch awkwardly as if he's uncomfortable rather than proud of his height — making him look gangly while Bush has a confident military-style bearing. Personal image really matters at debates in a subliminal way — especially,...
  • Kerry, Bush Put on Orange Alert

    09/30/2004 12:16:38 AM PDT · by NewMediaFan · 84 replies · 1,399+ views
    Yahoo! News ^ | Sept. 29 | PRNewswire
    The question on everyone's mind this week is whether the Wisconsin sun or an ineffective sunless tanning product has turned presidential candidate John Kerry's face from flesh color to a rich pumpkin hue. Either way, it's crucial that Kerry and President George W. Bush look their best this last month on the campaign trail, as voters have been swayed in the past based on physical appearances (think Nixon vs. Kennedy). In an effort to keep the candidates bronzed rather than orange, Chase Products Co. -- inventor of the first aerosol hair spray -- today is sending Kerry and President Bush...
  • Kerry Tan -- Is it a Chemical Peel?

    09/29/2004 6:43:27 AM PDT · by Harpo Speaks · 101 replies · 4,626+ views
    9/29/04 | Self
    Just heard a theory about Kerry's "tan" that has the ring of truth to it. Laura Ingraham has suggested that Kerry had a chemical peel on his face -- possibly suggested by TerEZa who it is assumed also suggested his botox. Apparentely, you need to stay out of the sun after a chemical peel, otherwise it will turn the hue currently seen on Kerry's pan. This theory seems to make sense to me, and it also explains why Kerry's staff is saying he got the color by "playing in the sun all day." There's just enough truth in that statment...
  • Fearless Forecast

    09/29/2004 6:43:58 PM PDT · by Davis · 23 replies · 664+ views
    The Conning Tower ^ | October 1, 2004 | Trentino
    All of us pajama pundits are eagerly anticipating the first Presidential Debate of the current electoral season. Will beads of sweat glisten on John Kerry's Botoxicated orange brow? Alas, I have misplaced my crystal ball and my Ouija board is on the fritz so I don't know what will perspire, but I am happy to divulge the expectations of a perceptive subscriber to this website's newsletter: I am waiting for the Cambodian Candidate to put on the Magic Hat given him by the Invisible CIA Guy & thus attired show up & win the debates.Although we have been privileged to...
  • Cheneys go beyond the pale ("pale" Get it? Ha! Ha!)

    09/30/2004 1:25:55 AM PDT · by Cincinatus' Wife · 97 replies · 2,370+ views
    Boston Herald ^ | September 30, 2004 | David R. Guarino
    John Kerry's campaign was seeing red - or was it orange? - over a swipe yesterday by the Republicans over his new suntan. Vice President Dick Cheney, at a town hall-style campaign event in Minnesota, told the audience that student proctors could be seen wearing orange shirts. Lynne Cheney asked her husband what the shirts ``remind you of?'' The veep paused, prompting his wife to say, ``I'll say it: How about John Kerry's suntan?'' The crowd laughed, apparently having seen reports about Kerry's tan. The vice president noted he might have to ``disassociate'' himself from the remark but added it...
  • Lynne Cheney jokes about Kerry's tan

    09/29/2004 8:54:05 PM PDT · by mowowie · 30 replies · 1,206+ views
    DULUTH, Minn. - Something about Sen. John Kerry (news - web sites)'s darker appearance has caught Lynne Cheney's eye.
  • Lynne Cheney Jokes About Kerry's Tan

    09/29/2004 1:53:11 PM PDT · by Cableguy · 91 replies · 3,920+ views
    ABC News/Note ^ | 9/29/04
    "What do those orange shirts remind you of?" Lynne Cheney asks Vice President Cheney in Duluth, MN. "How about John Kerry's sun tan?"
  • KERRY SAYS THE TAN'S REAL BUT IT'S EASY TO FAKE IT

    09/30/2004 12:37:58 AM PDT · by kattracks · 55 replies · 3,092+ views
    New York Post ^ | 9/30/04 | MICHAEL KANE
    September 30, 2004 -- JOHN Kerry is one bronzed candidate - or is that tan-di-date? The Democratic nominee and windsurfing enthusiast says he picked up his brand-new glow at a football game last week in Massachusetts - just in time for tonight's first presidential debate. But can a rain-drenched New Yorker get a Kerry glow in time for the debate? To find out, I tried the friendly folks at Hollywood Tans on 25th Street and Sixth Avenue. "I want to look like John Kerry," I announced. The staff at the front desk laughed. "I saw that photo," said staffer Iris...
  • FAKE BAKE

    09/29/2004 6:13:01 AM PDT · by CHAROM · 12 replies · 902+ views
    http://mostlydeadarmadillos.com/ ^ | WEDNESDAY SEPT. 29, 2004 | STEPHEN JOHNSON
    Oompa Loompa. Traffic Cone. Orange Alert. Is this what the Kerry Campaign wants the voters talking about just before a major debate? There is no way around it anymore. The democrats are just plain stupid. Why on earth would Kerry go out 3 days before a debate and get a spray on Tan? I can imagine his handlers telling him "Ya know Senator, John Kennedy had a great tan in '60. Here, spray this on. Its JFK in a can!" Kerry's fake tan will last as long as his positions on Iraq, about one week.
  • Orange Alert: Fake Tan on the Campaign Trail (Exotic Dancer Says Kerry May Suffer 'Tanorexia')

    09/29/2004 7:46:32 AM PDT · by gopwinsin04 · 34 replies · 2,340+ views
    NY Sun ^ | 9/29/04 | Pia Catton
    'If the tan is something you notice, you've gone too far.' You should never look at someone and say, 'Wow, that man is tan,' says Jessica 'Kayla' Conrad, a former stripper and author of the self help book- 'Dance Naked: The Guide to Unleashing Your Inner Hottie.' And in Mr. Kerry's case, he's going for a specific look. 'It's all about the sex appeal,' she said. 'It lends him a Kennedy-esque, time spent boating quality.'Indeed, with his suddenly tanned skin, Mr. Kerry appears to be trying to tap into the image making power of television-as John F. Kennedy did against...