Kerry, Bush Put on Orange Alert

Yahoo! News ^ | Sept. 29 | PRNewswire

[NewMediaFan]

The question on everyone's mind this week is whether the Wisconsin sun or an ineffective sunless tanning product has turned presidential candidate John Kerry's face from flesh color to a rich pumpkin hue.

Either way, it's crucial that Kerry and President George W. Bush look their best this last month on the campaign trail, as voters have been swayed in the past based on physical appearances (think Nixon vs. Kennedy).

In an effort to keep the candidates bronzed rather than orange, Chase Products Co. -- inventor of the first aerosol hair spray -- today is sending Kerry and President Bush a month's supply of its new SALON SOLATTE(TM) Tanning Mist, which contains two exclusively refined sugars -- the FDA-approved tanning additive dihydroxyacetone (DHA) and erythrulose -- as active ingredients that when combined with white tea extracts and aloe react with amino acids in the skin's surface cells to darken without damage, creating a safe and natural looking tan.

"Based on our extensive research and history in the beauty industry, we've developed a sophisticated, balanced and exclusive formula of refined sugars and other natural ingredients," said Judy Albazi, vice president of operations for Chase Products Co. "The result is a superior product that delivers a natural looking tan rather than an orange-like appearance."

[NewMediaFan]

Orange Alert !

[LiberalBassTurds]

LBT

-=-=-

[FesterUSMC]

an ineffective sunless tanning product has turned presidential candidate John Kerry's face from flesh color to a rich pumpkin hue.

LOL

[Shellback Chuck]

I can guarantee you it wasn't the sun in Wisconsin.

[MadAnthony1776]

Kerry wanted that cheesehead look and it backfired!!!!!

[FesterUSMC]

uhhh your out of line....

[kcvl]

SALON SOLATTE is an aerosol tanning alternative that takes the very best of liquid applications and puts it at the fingertips of tan lovers to deliver beautiful, sexy-looking tans that last up to ten days.

The magic tanning ingredient in each aerosol is DHA (dihydroxyacetone), the only color additive currently approved by the U.S. Food & Drug Administration for externally applied cosmetics that are made for the purpose of imparting color to the human body. For SALON SOLATTE we add a DHA relative, erythrulose, to provide a longer-lasting tan.

DHA and erythrulose work safely with the skin to form dark compounds. It’s a process as natural as a freshly cut apple darkening upon exposure to air and light. SALON SOLATTE tans are influenced by natural skin color, by the amount of spray that has been applied, and by the time the spray remains undisturbed.

[Salamander]

Now you be nice.
He *just* got here.

[wink wink nudge nudge]

[DSBull]

Bush doesn't need it, since he goes outside and works at his ranch, even when the cameras aren't there, uhmmm? I wonder if Kerry has ever done any manual labor...

[nopardons]

ROTFLMSO and exactly what I was thinking was about to be Kerry's next color. :-)

[FesterUSMC]

did you read that retards post?

[Jet Jaguar]

He claimed he drove a tractor around Bunker Hill or something.

[LiberalBassTurds]

LOL nopardons...great minds...again. I figured this was the next logical step for him too. :^)

[LiberalBassTurds]

Thanks for slapping him down Fester old buddy. I was so taken back I didn't know what to say.

[FesterUSMC]

Bass Turds :^D don't worry bud I got your back :^D

[LiberalBassTurds]

Thanks Fester, much appreciated! :^)

[FesterUSMC]

hey do you have to post that image everytime you post or do you somehow have it saved in a setting on FR? I was thinking about making one for myself

[Salamander]

Yes.

That was a very, *very* subtle TROLL ALERT...LOL!

Now he'll be scared away before The Zot cometh.....:-\

[Salamander]

I spoke too late.
He has already been carried off to Trollhalla.