I had just walked through the front door when I heard those words that send chills up the spine of every man. "This is why we can't have anything nice!" It was my wife. I put the mail on the stairs while I tried to figure out if I could make it back out the front door without her hearing me. I knew I couldn't. The woman can hear what I think, for crying out loud. Now, I had to determine who did it while I was still unseen. There are always three likely culprits: 1. Me 2. The Boy...