I was wondering the other day, if I ran for president, what would be my campaign promises? I made a list I'm certain can get me elected. If I'm elected President, I will… Require members of Congress to work out on the Total Gym 15 minutes each day – or else they can't vote on anything. Cut spending by dismissing the Secret Service, at least for my eight years in office (why would I need them?). Resurrect Bruce Lee and appoint him head of homeland security (OK, the CIA and FBI too). Give a presidential pardon to … no one,...