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Humor (Bloggers & Personal)

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  • UK Muslims Demand Voting Age Be Lowered To 13 So Their Wives Can Vot

    07/17/2025 12:21:02 PM PDT · by DFG · 17 replies
    Babylon Bee ^ | 07/17/2025 | Babylon Bee
    LONDON — In a protest to make the nation's democratic process more inclusive, Muslims in the United Kingdom marched to demand that the voting age be lowered to 13 so their wives would be able to vote. Following intense debate on the wisdom and necessity of lowering the voting age in the UK, lawmakers agreed that there could be a case to be made for making it legal for the child brides of the country's millions of Muslim residents to vote in elections. "Every wife in the UK should have the right to vote, even when they are children," said...
  • VIDEO: Butler MAGA Crowd (Not Shooting) Gave CBS News Scott MacFarlane PTSD

    07/17/2025 8:37:45 AM PDT · by PJ-Comix · 24 replies
    Rumble ^ | July 17, 2025 | DUmmie FUnnies
    VIDEOForget President Trump being just millimeters away from being killed. Forget about Corey Comperatore who actually was killed. Forget about the ones who were wounded. Scott MacFarlane of CBS News is the most vocal victim, at least in his own mind, of the Butler shooting. See, Poor Scott is now suffering from PTSD he got at Butler. Not from the shooting itself but because he thought the crowd was nasty towards him. Lack of politeness forced Scott to take trauma leave. Awwww! We must now all grieve in sympathy for a terrified snowflake who got his feelings hurt.
  • CBS News correspondent Scott MacFarlane tells Chuck Todd he got "PTSD" after Trump assassination attempt — *NOT* from the shooting, but because the crowd blamed the media

    07/17/2025 5:34:57 AM PDT · by DFG · 31 replies
    X ^ | 07/16/2025 | Jason Cohen
    NEW: CBS News correspondent Scott MacFarlane tells Chuck Todd he got "PTSD" after Trump assassination attempt — *NOT* from the shooting, but because the crowd blamed the media. "For those of us there, it was such a horror." "I got diagnosed with PTSD within 48 hours. I got put on trauma leave. Not because, I think, of the shooting, but because you could — you saw it in the eyes, the reaction of the people." "They were coming for us! If he didn't jump up with his fist, they were going to come kill us!"
  • Dem Base Wants Blood [semi-satire]

    07/16/2025 10:33:30 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 9 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 July 2025 | John Semmens
    The success that President Trump is enjoying getting his policies implemented is spurring Democrat voters to demand that their elected representatives do more to prevent this undesired trend. An exasperated Rep. Brad Schneider (D-Ill) said "we've been doing all the usual things--voting against Republican-backed legislation, vilifying them in the media, and soliciting donations for the 2026 mid-term elections--but our white, well-educated voters living in upscale suburban or urban neighborhoods want more." "A few Democrat officeholders have been more confrontational," Schneider pointed out. "Rep. Green (Tex) got himself ejected for heckling President Trump in Congress. Sen. Padilla (Calif) got himself tackled...
  • VIDEO: MULTIPLE Terry Moran AI Shills Hype His New Substack with Identical Videos

    07/16/2025 9:56:42 AM PDT · by PJ-Comix · 1 replies
    Rumble ^ | July 16, 2025 | DUmmie FUnnies
    VIDEOThirty-five! THIRTY-FIVE!!! As of the morning of July 16, 2025 there were THIRTY-FIVE AI shills hyping Terry Moran's new Substack. Different voices but with almost identical YouTube videos and scripts featuring the same still shot of Terry Moran arrayed in different ways. Does Terry Moran have multiple loyal fans that think almost exactly alike or is that really YOU, Terry Moran?
  • Newsom Founds Underground Railroad To Help Mexican Kids Travel To Work The Marijuana Farms

    07/15/2025 12:33:25 PM PDT · by DFG · 28 replies
    Babylon Bee ^ | 07/15/2025 | Babylon Bee
    SACRAMENTO, CA — An inspiring story emerged amid the ongoing immigration controversy, as Governor Gavin Newsom founded an Underground Railroad to help Mexican kids travel to work on California's marijuana farms. After ICE operations made headlines in recent weeks with raids on California cannabis farms, Newsom made the noble decision to create a secret system to help unaccompanied minor migrants avoid detection by the authorities and find their way north to work as day laborers. "Every Mexican kid deserves the chance to live out their dream of working as slave labor in California," Newsom told reporters. "This weed isn't going...
  • Biden's Doctor Pleads the 5th [semi-satire]

    07/15/2025 10:34:42 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 4 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 July 2025 | John Semmens
    In his appearance at the House Oversight Committee last week, former President Biden's personal physician Dr. Kevin O'Connor invoked his constitutional right under the Fifth Amendment and declined to answer questions on the grounds that his answers might incriminate him. Oversight Chairman James Comer (R-Ky) revealed the two questions that inspired Dr. O'Connor's refusal to answer, saying "our first question was 'were you ever told to lie about the president's health?' He Pleaded the Fifth. Our second question was 'Did you ever believe President Biden was unfit to execute his duties?' He pleaded the Fifth. I think that his refusal...
  • VIDEO: New Age Theologian Hypes Magic Stones to Counter the Trumpocalypse

    07/15/2025 8:39:20 AM PDT · by PJ-Comix · 35 replies
    Rumble ^ | July 15, 2025 | DUmmie FUnnies
    VIDEODid you know the Liberal Pink Hat Lady is also a New Age theologian? Here she is in her official Witch shirt hyping Magic Stones as a way to counter the evil Trumpocalypse. And since we are at almost the six month mark of President Donald Trump's presidency that means we are only 1/8 of the way into his Golden Age return which means we still have 7/8 remaining.Moral of the story. If you are a liberal suffering from extreme TDS and can't tolerate political diversity you can take solace in magic stones, Tarot cards, and burning incense in special...
  • Bear On California State Flag Moves To Texas

    07/14/2025 11:52:52 AM PDT · by DFG · 11 replies
    Babylon Bee ^ | 07/14/2025 | Babylon Bee
    SACRAMENTO, CA — A piece of the Golden State's heritage was lost today, as the iconic grizzly bear that had adorned the California state flag announced that he had officially moved to Texas. Monarch, the revered bear that has represented the state on its flag since it was officially adopted in 1911, revealed that he was leaving California for the Lone Star State after giving up hope that things at home would ever improve. "I want to live in a state where my bear family has a better future," he said. "California has perfect weather and amazing food options, but...
  • Gov Objects to ICE Raid on Marijuana Farm [semi-satire]

    07/14/2025 11:28:00 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 6 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 July 2025 | John Semmens
    A very irate Gov. Gavin Newsom (D-Calif) strenuously objected to an Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) raid on the Glass House Farms in Camarillo. saying "this invasion by an uninvited federal agency is wrong in so many ways. First, California is a sanctuary state. We love our immigrants and don't want them taken away. Second, California was once a part of Mexico before it was stolen in 1848. Third, Graham Farrar, the co-founder, president, and board director of Glass House Farms, has donated thousands to Democrats in California. He deserves better treatment. Fourth, this raid forced me to cut my...
  • VIDEO: TikTok Reactions to Trump at FIFA Club World Cup

    07/14/2025 9:45:42 AM PDT · by PJ-Comix · 17 replies
    Rumble ^ | July 14, 2025 | DUmmie FUnnies
    VIDEOEEEK! He wouldn't leave the stage when the Manchester Club received their World Cup winner trophy! Eeek! Hey, President Donald Trump is entitled especially since it happened on the one year anniversary of not only America but the World being saved when Trump miraculously dodged the assassin's bullet by millimeters at Butler, PA. Even the booing by the Trump hating anti-Americans could not spoil the FIFA celebratory moment. Oh, and by Trump taking part in the team victory on stage it brought attention in America to a sport we call soccer but which the rest of the world calls football....
  • Update : Leftist who blocked traffic outside the TPUSA event in Tampa charged with battery, resisting arrest, and driving under the influence

    07/13/2025 12:58:28 PM PDT · by DFG · 13 replies
    X ^ | 07/13/2025 | Julio Rosas
    UPDATE: The man in the video is Trevor Smith. Along with being charged with battery and resisting arrest, he is also being charged with driving under the influence. He is still in jail, according to the Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office.
  • "Big Tent" Strategy Explained [semi-satire]

    07/13/2025 10:55:07 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 1 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 July 2025 | John Semmens
    Democratic National Committee (DNC) Chair Ken Martin attempted to rebuff criticism of its welcoming attitude toward antisemitism by explaining "look, the Democratic Party has been the most successful political organization in America's history. The reason why it has been is that it has always had a 'big tent' philosophy of tolerance for diverse viewpoints. Some of those viewpoints--like support of slavery--are no longer legal. But others, like antisemitism are merely controversial. Those having such views are entitled to participate in the democratic process of voting for candidates who best represent their views." PBS News Hour, host Amna Nawaz asked Martin...
  • LMAO! A radical leftist just tried blocking traffic outside the Turning Point USA event in Tampa, and got absolutely WRECKED by a police officer

    07/13/2025 8:43:12 AM PDT · by DFG · 72 replies
    X ^ | 07/12/2025 | Nick Sortor
    LMAO! A radical leftist just tried blocking traffic outside the Turning Point USA event in Tampa, and got absolutely WRECKED by a police officer Florida cops don’t play! 🤣🔥
  • VIDEO: My Wife Maintains Her Amazing Slots Luck but We Still LOST!

    07/12/2025 5:51:45 PM PDT · by PJ-Comix · 57 replies
    Rumble ^ | July12, 2025 | DUmmie FUnnies
    VIDEOHow can that be? My wife had a string of WINS at the Casino today, July 12, 2025, yet we ended up still LOSING to the tune of about $30 to $40. How? Because of horribly LOUSY payouts. In fact our best slots payout today was about what our WORST payout was in June when she also had a string of WINS but WINS with normal to good payouts. We will be taking a break from the casino until early August because it seems that Lady Luck would only joke around with us again if we went back before then.So...
  • Justice Demands Pay Raise [semi-satire]

    07/12/2025 1:17:32 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 10 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 July 2025 | John Semmens
    Statistics showing that Associate Supreme Court Justice Ketanji Brown-Jackson has spoken more words than any other Supreme Court Justice since she joined the Court in 2022 has inspired her to demand a pay raise. "Data compiled by the New York Times show me far ahead of the others," she said. "I have spoken more than twice as many words (11,003) as second place finisher Amy Coney Barrett (4,475), more than three times as many as Chief Justice John Roberts (3,469), and more than 100 times as many as Clarence Thomas. Yet, I am still the lowest paid member of the...
  • The Count of Monte Cristo

    07/12/2025 10:26:45 AM PDT · by SunkenCiv · 27 replies
    don't blame Dumas for this | July 12, 2025 | I was just making a sandwich, and...
    The Count of Monte Cristo
  • VIDEO: Man at Top of Epstein's List Denounces Conspiracy Theories About Him

    07/11/2025 4:28:20 PM PDT · by PJ-Comix · 9 replies
    Rumble ^ | July 11, 2025 | DUmmie FUnnies
    VIDEOThere is a lot of frustration that Jeffrey Epstein's list has not yet been publicly released despite the promise to do so. However, there is universal acknowledgement that the list does have one name for sure at the very top. And now you can hear that person at the very top of the Epstein list complain about the conspiracy theories directed at him.
  • VIDEO: "Mosquitos the Size of Elephants" Are Attacking Alligator Alcatraz Detainees!!!

    07/10/2025 8:11:08 AM PDT · by PJ-Comix · 54 replies
    Rumble ^ | July 10, 2025 | DUmmie FUnnies
    VIDEOThe HORROR! The absolute HORROR of Alligator Alcatraz!!! The detainees there are being assaulted by mosquitos THE SIZE OF ELEPHANTS! How do we know? Because a Cuban rapper detainee told us so via his cell phone from inside Alligator Alcatraz. On that same cell phone call he also informed the world that the detainees are suffering from freezing tents due to being tortured by air conditioning. Yes, rather than allowing the prisoners bask in the natural hot tropical humid temperatures, they are being forced to endure unnatural freezing air conditioning.I must admit that I was skeptical of claims of a...
  • After TSA Policy Change, Production Finally Resumes At Crazy Mohammed's Shoe Bomb Factory

    07/09/2025 12:48:39 PM PDT · by DFG · 13 replies
    Babylon Bee ^ | 07/09/2025 | Babylon Bee
    DAMASCUS — Following the announcement by the Transportation Security Administration that the policy requiring airline passengers to remove their footwear at airport checkpoints was being lifted, news broke that production had finally resumed at Crazy Mohammed's Shoe Bomb Factory. The company had been struggling to stay in business since December 2001, when Richard Reid attempted to detonate a shoe bomb on board a passenger flight, resulting in tighter security measures that required passengers to remove their shoes for screening. Crazy Mohammed Al-Badawi, founder and president of Crazy Mohammed's, said the policy change came just in time. "We're back in business,...