WASHINGTON, D.C. — America's GDP has fallen over the last two quarters, stoking fears of a possible recession due to the fact that America is now in a recession. When asked whether the U.S. is now in a recession, Biden answered that he wasn't qualified to answer, as he doesn't have a biology degree. "I don't know if we're in a recession, I'm not a biologist," said Biden to the bronze bust of Hugo Chávez in his office. "Leave that stuff to the experts, Jack! If you ask me, the economy should lose some weight, anyway. Too fat. We deserve...