Posted on 12/03/2024 12:21:33 PM PST by dayglored
U.S. — After the grotesque pink design of the new Jaguar was leaked to the public, the nation's gays have confirmed they are not really interested in the new car and will just stick with their very gay Mustang convertibles.
"We appreciate Jaguar trying to market to us by being extremely flamboyantly gay, but we already have the gayest car known to man, and it will never be topped: the Ford Mustang," said Chandler Borgins of Los Angeles, California. "We'll just stick with these, thanks."
Experts say the Mustang, which has long been a gay icon, has been purchased almost exclusively by gays for decades. "Ford really caught lightning in a bottle with this iconic sports car," said car enthusiast Jay Leno to reporters. "There has never been a gayer set of wheels to ever grace the roads of the United States."
Leno's statement was tragically cut short as he fell down some stairs, through a glass window, and into some wet cement.
Jaguar preorder figures reflect the poor reception to their rebranding and redesign, with only one preorder going to a blind Mary Kay saleswoman.
At publishing time, the nation's closeted gays had confirmed they'll be sticking with their Ford F-150s.
But
the
acceleration
in
that
thing
was
faster
than
anything
else
I
drove.
And that was while it was in Eco mode. When I put it in Sport mode it was even better. LOL
I didn't get it because it didn't have a high enough miles/kWh for what I was looking for. No shock there. It's advertised as a sports car; it's like the gas version not having a high mpg.
And the DC fast charging max speed wasn't as fast as the EV crossover I wound up getting. There's no way I could have made the 1,740 mile one-way trip I made in August from New Brunswick to Alabama in 32.5 hours (not counting hotel stay time) in the Mach-e like I did in my crossover EV. IMHO the Mach-e is the EV stereotype of being just a neat toy and not good for family use (i.e. ostensibly why they made it a crossover style). It's like they lowered the visual appeal from the sports car look to the almost-mini-van look, but in the end had no substantial reason for doing so.
I didn’t realize it was the Bee...
I just watched it. I'm frankly having trouble believing Jaguar actually did this. It's so completely, grotesquely over the top. It truly seems like a put-on.
I'm hoping against hope that this is just a huge, extended marketing trick to get attention ("HA-HA Made you look!!"), and after a couple weeks Jaguar pulls a bait-and-switch and produces something reasonable.
” I know why british people like warm beer.
Lucas makes refrigerators too.”
Many people don’t realize Lucas made vacuum cleaners. It’s the only thing they made that didn’t suck.
Hahahaha! I love his style and that comment about “drag” was indeed pretty funny!
And...yeah. It has stone in it. As he piquantly states...the designers must have been stoned!
That was well worth the 6.5 minutes!
Agreed...I really had a hard time believing a company could be so far away from its roots to produce...that! “Totems”? WTF????
Not even close.
VW Beetle Convertible, hands down.
The "totems" make me think of plugging "crystals" into a device -- quartz if it's New-Age groovy, or di-lithium it it's 60's sci-fi. I'm baffled by those things being stored on the exterior.
Well, I'm baffled by the entire thing. It's an acid trip made corporeal.
Oh, dear. I got myself a red Mustang for a retirement gift.
At least it isn’t a convertible.
When I someone say “MGuy says there were stones in it” I had no idea what that was.
I could see where owning a 70’s Mustang II could qualify someone for testing. Probably something along the lines of playing ‘I will survive’ by Gloria Gaynor. If the dude owning it naturally starts dancing, your daughter is safe around him. Hell, they can stay out late as they want.
Possible exception for the 302 Mustang II, but dude..
My questionable Ford choices in life include: Mustangs I’ve owned: 66 1/2, 81, and a 2014. On my 2nd F150 now, a 2015 (love that SOB), and potentially semi-gay 2002 F150 with a Triton v8. Have owned an a 87 Ranger, 88 Bronco, Explorer, a Lincoln LS, Lincoln Navigator and whatever that 5 speed front wheel drive thing was in the early 90’s (GLX?). Also a Ram Truck 4x4 quad cab beast that pulled my boat like it was just hauling groceries, a Cadillac Seville STS with a drippy Northstar V8 (changing my last name to Soprano) and whatever else I’m forgetting. Oh, the 77 Olds Cutlass Supreme - you never forget your first, the one that got away.
I know this is the Bee, but is that image of the new jaguar for real?
That’s even uglier than the Tesla truck.
I had a Forester at one time.
I really liked it. With good snow tires, it could climb trees. I ***NEVER*** had a problem driving in the winter.
HOWEVER, the thing ate brakes like no get out.
Every year I had to replace all the brakes. Front in the spring, and rear in the fall. It got to be expensive to keep so traded it in.
My family’s one and only foray into buying Ford was when my dad bought a Ford Pinto.
It was the first, and the last Ford anyone ever got.
Especially in Pasadena...
I know, some would argue that the Dodge and the Chevy captions are switched.
Subarus are only virtue signaling cars in non-snow country. Everywhere there is snow and ice, they are just practical cars.
Here in Boise about every third car on the road is a Subaru. Some even have USMC and NRA stickers on them.
Like a continuation model of a mid-60s E-Type.
Not selling mine.
I had a Subaru GL wagon for quite a while. Bought it with 100K miles and sold it with about 210K, had to put a water pump in once, otherwise just changed the oil every 5,000 or so. It was a heavy car for its size, but I never had to replace the brakes. Not that great on really rough roads or in deep snow because of the low ground clearance.
All in all, a good little car. I’ve got nothing against Subarus.
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