Free Republic

It's Pride Month again, making this the perfect time of year to see what inspirational passages can be found in God's Word that pertain to the subject. Kick your pride up a notch and pass these comforting verses on to the gays in your life: 1. Genesis 19:24-25: "Then the Lord rained on Sodom and Gomorrah sulfur and fire from the Lord out of heaven. And he overthrew those cities, and all the valley, and all the inhabitants of the cities, and what grew on the ground." 2. Leviticus 18:22: "You shall not lie with a male as with a...

The AR-15 - the deadliest abomination known to man. A gun so terrible it's killed more people than net neutrality and Trump's tax cuts combined. And to demonstrate how awful this weapon is, I did something foolish: I tried firing one. And the experience was so horrible I have not stopped crying and soiling myself since.Yes, even as I type this, tears fill my eyes at the remembrance of pulling that trigger and the terrible things that followed. And my pants... my pants are so soaked.How to describe the experience of firing that monstrosity? When I pulled the trigger, it...

LOUISVILLE, KY — Representative Thomas Massie has accused the Jewish population of rural Kentucky of being the cause of his primary defeat. After taking the stage to concede the race to Ed Gallrein, an angry Massie squarely laid the blame for his loss on the "dirty Zionists" of the tiny country towns that dot the Ohio River valley. "I couldn't reach Gallrein to concede. He was probably lost with his supporters in yet another small-town Kentucky synagogue," declared Massie. "Yes, the deck was stacked against me by the Hebrew population of rural Kentucky. We ran a great campaign, I'm really...

(Image Matthew G Eddy / Shutterstock) AI uses a lot of power, and it needs massive data centers to support it. That's why, despite data centers having existed for decades, people are suddenly running for the hills. But do they have a reason to be afraid? You be the judge. Here are the scariest facts about data centers: Data centers are the ugliest buildings on earth: Ancient Greeks never built utilitarian buildings. They're almost as bad as nuclear power plants: And 100 times more deadly. They drink up one whole ocean per ChatGPT query: We might need the oceans...

U.S. — In a move that even some within the entertainment industry are branding as "too far", director Christopher Nolan has cast actor Steve Buscemi as Helen of Troy.Though Nolan has made several unorthodox casting decisions for his upcoming movie The Odyssey, none have raised as many eyebrows as casting Buscemi in the role of the most beautiful woman on the planet."Steve's is the face that launched a thousand ships," declared Nolan upon making the announcement. "I could never imagine anyone else playing Helen. The moment we started on the Odyssey, my first call was to Steve. I said, 'Steve,...

Guns kill people. It's just a proven fact. Watch this exclusive coverage from The Babylon Bee of frightening but 100% true facts about the weapons of war on our streets otherwise known as guns. Frightening But 100% True Facts About Guns

U.S. — Longtime daytime talk show "The View" has announced that next season will feature an all-new cast of angry middle-aged women. After years of occasional changes among the show's personalities, ABC has moved to replace all five of the previous hosts, though it is sticking with the archetype of emotional middle-aged women. "We're ready for a fresh set of high-pitched, seething voices," said showrunner Denette Holman. "The chemistry we are seeing in the new group of hosts is wonderful. The rants, the cattiness, the imminent menopause, it's all there. We're looking forward to a great season." Focus groups...

LOS ANGELES, CA — Democrats have unleashed vicious attack ads accusing L.A. mayoral candidate Spencer Pratt of not wanting to destroy the state of California. The new series of ads features devastating videos of Pratt saying things like "I don't think California should be reduced into a pile of rubble." "Spencer Pratt wants to keep Los Angeles from burning to ash," says the narrator for the ad. "He wants to put violent criminals in jail, stop giving free money to drug addicts, and let firefighters use water to put out fires. Let's keep California crumbling. Let's keep away from Spencer...

MANHATTAN — The State of New York has graciously offered to allow American hantavirus patients to stay in any of their local nursing homes. With seventeen Americans being ordered into quarantine due to hantavirus exposure, Governor Hochul immediately called to request the patients be housed as close as possible to elderly, infirm New Yorkers. "We are following the science," announced Governor Hochul. "While red states languish, New York will once again lead the way in pandemic preparation by securing all infected patients inside nursing homes. We know from experience how to trap a virus inside the buildings which contain...

MIDDLE EAST — An oil tanker has managed to slip through the Strait of Hormuz completely undetected after donning a giant fake nose and mustache. The tanker, known as the Delta Magnus, nonchalantly floated in disguise past both the Iranian and American blockades, leaving both sides none the wiser.

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Donald Trump called an impromptu press conference in front of the White House this week to deliver a life-changing message to actor Mark Hamill, revealing that he was, in reality, the actor's father. The actor was reportedly reluctant to accept the invitation to appear at the press conference but sensed something deep within himself that made him feel compelled to be present. "Search your feelings, Mark, you know it to be true," Trump said while extending his hand toward Hamill. "George Lucas never told you what happened to your father." Hamill recoiled in fear, somehow knowing what...

RICHMOND, VA — In the wake of the Virginia Supreme Court striking down the commonwealth's redrawn voting map, Democrats proposed a new measure that just makes it illegal for Republicans to vote. In lieu of further political maneuvers to suppress Republicans from having Congressional representation, the Democratic Party said it had decided to address the root cause of the problem. "This is way easier," said Democratic Governor Abigail Spanberger. "We're tackling the real issue, which is Republicans being allowed to vote at all. There will be no more campaigning, no more counting ballots. That stuff is such a hassle anyway."...

MONTEREY PARK, CA — A heated debate between the candidates for governor of California descended into mayhem last night after Katie Porter dumped an entire pot of scalding mashed potatoes on the moderators' heads. Witnesses said the incident occurred roughly forty-three minutes into the debate when moderators attempted to ask Porter about repeated allegations of her abusing staff and family members. "You want to play that game with me?? Have a taste!" shouted Porter, producing an industrial-sized stock pot filled with boiling hot potatoes. "I'm going to melt those lips together so that you can never open your mouth...

President Donald Trump announced this week that he was reinstating the Presidential Fitness Test to evaluate the physical health of America's public school students. To prepare the nation's youth, the White House has released the following list of updated physical challenges: 1. Bullet Dodging: An essential life skill for the modern era, especially if you aspire to run for office as a Republican. 2. The Alternating YMCA Double-Fist Pump: The kids learn exercise and the greatest dance ever invented. 3. Strait of Hormuz Swim: Extra credit given out for anyone who finds a mine. 4. Big Mac Curls: One 7.6-ounce...

A new Harvard/Harris poll finds that former Vice President Kamala Harris has opened up a significant lead in the race for the 2028 Democratic presidential nomination. Ms. Harris is the choice of 50% of Democrats surveyed, while her next closest competitor, Gov. Gavin Newsom (D., Calif.), gets the nod from just 22% of the donkeys. Bringing up the rear is a cast of characters each polling in single digits. Oddly, this new presidential polling momentum for Ms. Harris arrives just as some Democrats wonder out loud if she really should be running for governor of California.

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Senator Elizabeth Warren was seen riding into town Monday morning bearing the scalp of her defeated enemy, Spirit Airlines. The senator from Massachusetts previously opposed a merger between JetBlue and Spirit Airlines, arguing that Spirit Airlines "made mockery of Great Spirit" and only its defeat would "bring'em return of buffalo." "Me no make'em deal with palefaces," Warren said at the time. "Call for anti-trust. Me anti-trust white man." At the time, others argued in favor of the merger, saying it would save thousands of jobs and enable the two budget airlines to join forces against the...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Less than a week after yet another assassination attempt against President Donald Trump, leaders of the Democratic Party pushed back against claims that they are guilty of inciting violence and said anyone who thinks they are should be eliminated by any means necessary. Following accusations that their rhetoric stirred up supporters to commit violent acts against conservatives, prominent Democrats denied engaging in any incitement of political violence and stressed the importance of doing whatever is needed to take out anyone who thinks otherwise. "People who think we incite violence must be taken down," said House Minority Leader...

U.S. — The growing rift between the political right and left in the country became even more evident this week, as a new poll showed that a majority of Democrats believe the Lincoln assassination was staged. Though long held to be a historical fact, a plurality of Democratic voters went on record in a research study to confirm that they now suspect that President Abraham Lincoln was never actually assassinated by John Wilkes Booth, and that the entire incident was simply an elaborate hoax. "That whole situation was suspicious," lifelong Democrat Dean Stinson posted on social media. "Sure, the...

WASHINGTON, D.C. — A heated dispute broke out on Capitol Hill on Tuesday as President Donald Trump and Congresswoman Ilhan Omar clashed over whether the correct title of the Apostle Paul's epistle was "Two Corinthians" or "Eleven Corinthians." Sources said the disagreement began when Trump confidently referenced "Two Corinthians" during an impromptu press scrum, only for Omar to correct him that it's actually "Eleven Corinthians." "Excuse me, Mr. President, but it's obviously 'Eleven Corinthians'," said Omar. "Just like 'Eleven Samuel' and 'Eleven Kings'. Frankly, it's embarrassing that I, a Muslim of all people, would have to correct you on the...

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