OSLO — The Norwegian Nobel Committee has announced the recipient of this year's Nobel Peace Prize will be Hamas, for their valiant efforts to release a few kidnapped children in exchange for several terrorists. "The humanity, compassion, and kindness of this act are inspiring to us all," said a Nobel Committee Spokesperson Ingrid Haugen while presenting the award to a Hamas fighter wearing a vest strapped with c4 and ball bearings. "Hamas didn't need to release these orphaned Israeli child colonizers after slaughtering their parents in front of them, but they did. We could use more tender goodwill like this...