Free Republic

One officer said the teen's alleged conduct was the worst he had seen in his entire 39-year career. Ateenager is being accused of numerous acts of heinous sexual assault on a 7-year-old while they both were passengers on a school bus for students with special needs in central Indiana. Prosecutors allege that 15-year-old Landon Doty raped the younger student several times while other students were on the bus.

Distraught DUmmies protest the fraudulent DUmmie of the Year results that cost Nadin Brzezinski her title. As you know, our friends over at Conservative Cave conduct the annual polling to determine the winner of the much-coveted "DUmmie of the Year" (DOTY) award. Last year's winner, and deservedly so, was DUmmie nadinbrzezinski, affectionately known in these parts as Know-it-all Nadin. Nads blew the competition AWAY with her countless, unintentionally hilarious posts, filled with malaprops, misspellings, all-knowingness, and general condescension, on subjects as far-ranging as Fukushima gas clouds, trend-spotting and tipping points, her own coverage as a "journalist" of the Occupy...

The finalists are all standing on the stage, holding hands, smiling--though nervous--their pearly whites shining through red-glossed lips. The suspense is building. At last it's time to crown the winner. It's come down to this. . . . "And the winner of DUmmie of the Year for 2011 is . . . Miss Fallout Shelter, NADIN BRZEZINSKI!" The crowd cheers! The sash is draped over Nadin's siza--over Nadin. She's reachiing for the crown hat. She begins her victorious walk up the runway. Hit it, Bert Parks! And let's all sing along! HERE SHE IS, OUR MISS DUMMIELANDTune: "There She...