MIAMI, FL—Super Bowl organizers were really worried about the risk of a wardrobe malfunction for the 2020 halftime show. Previous errors have caused millions to be exposed to terrible things like nudity, cursing, and The Black-Eyed Peas for the first time. Instead of risking a wardrobe malfunction this year, event planners decided to eliminate most of the singers' wardrobes. "We didn't want to risk someone's shirt or pants falling off, so we just got rid of the shirt and pants," said one choreographer. "You can't have a wardrobe malfunction without a wardrobe. It's a genius plan." In another major precaution,...