Posted on 11/17/2010 4:41:14 PM PST by Sergio
I thought we would start a list of whitty things that we can say to groping TSA agents that we could get away with and still make them uncomfortable. I'll start with a few, I hope many more will be added.
1. The doctor says I shouldn't be contagious...awww what the heck, I'm willing to risk it.
2. How many times can I get searched before I have to to to my gate?
3. Scabies and crabs...scabies and crabs...scabies and crabs...
4. Is tipping allowed?
5. (In a Homer Simpson looking at doughnuts voice) Hmmmmmmmmm...great pat down.
6. If you don't mind, please leave it pointing in the direction you found it.
Have at my FRiends!!!
Suck it!
Yes, someone on FR yesterday suggested everyone just MOAN loadly while being touched.....
I’m gonna get me a pair of these shorts. Make it easy for ‘em.
http://27.media.tumblr.com/Hn4CZClkqoa3d86fyo4noSgno1_500.jpg
(Warning. R-rated photo.)
Heh heh.
Is Mike FReeping tonight?
I remember his thread from earlier today. If he does not answer, maybe we could pass the hat for bail money?
10. Sorry...I can’t help myself. (no need to say or do anything else, let the TSA guy worry about what you can’t help yourself about.)
11. Hey is Larry working today? I hear he’s the best at this.
How about
Show me your probable cause
Touch me and I will have you arrested for assault
Last time I checked it was against the law to grope an American citizen against their will
When it is likely that an white female Okie will blow up a plane then you can search me
Can I have the your name and badge number as well as the name and number of the head of security at this facility so I will know who to name in the lawsuit?
Don’t act like your not impressed.
Dude...AWESOME, disgusting, but AWESOME.
By the way...you owe me a keyboard.
Strap a large banana to your leg, then exclaim when examined, “In my country, we always carry our fruit there. How do you do it in your country?”
Is Mike FReeping tonight?
Don't know, but he could use a laugh after what he went through.
5.56mm
It ain’t R rated in Florence
“Go gay on the TSA agents.... :)”
Some deep moaning and groaning, followed by some quick yes, yes, YESes!
(hand pounding on the table optional - courtesy of Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally.”)
Tell them this: “I’m HiV positive.’’
Do I get a happy ending?
How’s it hanging NOW?
They don’t really need a “real” reason. But I like to get there early so I have the time to put up with the brown shirt lame attempts at intimidation. Ultimately, there is not much they can do, if they don’t want a lawsuit. If you give them the impression that you are itching for one, well, turnabout is fair play.
I was reading comments after an article and a person who had supposedly watched a ‘pat’ down said the TSA person told the person ‘patted’ down to wait, then took the gloves and had them scanned/analyzed. Perhaps that means they have the ‘sniffed’ for residue from explosive? But then again maybe they just stick the gloves with the hands still in them in a ‘sniffer’ and if no problem use them on the next person in line.............
12. Start singing the intro to a classic song from “The Who” See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me.
Man, I wish I could post to my original entry.
13. (In you best Verizon Guy voice) Can you feel me now? Good!
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