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British spy caught on tape masturbating on a stone-like transmitter
funreports.com ^ | 2/9/2006 | Staff

Posted on 02/15/2006 9:56:45 AM PST by Red Badger

Journalist of Russia’s First TV Channel (ORT) Viktor Shvagerus insists that Russian special services have a video of British spy Andrew Fleming masturbating on the spy stone. Two weeks ago, Russia’s FSB reported seizing of a spy electronic device belonging to the British intelligence designed as a stone. But it turned out later that the national TV channels did not show the most interesting part of the spy scandal. British spy masturbates on the transmitter

The other day, cameraman of the First TV Channel Viktor Shvagerus informed on his Internet page (the blog ‘svezhy’) that editors of the channel had censored the footage of the operation made by the FSB. The cameraman wrote: “Censorship was applied to the footage showing one of the supposed spies performing an indecent action with the stone-like transmitter. Behind the cameras FSB experts explained that the British spy was masturbating in front of the stone. They did not name the man, but they grinned every time the name of Andrew Fleming was mentioned (secretary of the British Embassy in Russia Andrew Fleming is meant).”

There is no reason to doubt the credibility of the statements made by the well-known journalist. The spy stone scandal was stinky from very beginning. And now when more details of the story have surfaced it seems to be more revolting.

Head of the RF FSB’s Public Relations Center Colonel Sergey Ignatchenko says the electronic device disguised as a stone may cost about $30 million. Mr. Andrew Fleming will have a good time talking to his chiefs about the frivolous actions that he performed with such an expensive device, Express Gazeta wrote.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Conspiracy; Humor; Miscellaneous; Pets/Animals; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: darkshearesfault; spankrock
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To: martin_fierro
Why, oh why, did I ask to be put on this list?


Master of my domain...

61 posted on 02/15/2006 1:32:41 PM PST by SquirrelKing (Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.)
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To: Ultra Sonic 007; MeekOneGOP; Conspiracy Guy; DocRock; King Prout; SandyInSeattle; Darksheare; ...
If the stone had been carved, he could have been charged with statue-tory rape.


62 posted on 02/15/2006 1:55:07 PM PST by Slings and Arrows ("I'd rather hunt with Cheney than drive with Kennedy." --fanfan)
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To: Millee; Jersey Republican Biker Chick
From Russia with Love, II!

Thunderballs!

63 posted on 02/15/2006 2:59:13 PM PST by Gondring (I'll give up my right to die when hell freezes over my dead body!)
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To: al baby; Slings and Arrows
Was this guy caught beebing his stuner?



MOOOO!
64 posted on 02/15/2006 5:13:33 PM PST by glock rocks (Real engineers don't answer "why" questions.)
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To: dighton
Sing it with me, you know the Neil Diamond tune!!

Stones would play inside her head
And where she slept they made her bed
And she would ache for love, and get but stones
La la la la la la la la la la

65 posted on 02/15/2006 5:48:45 PM PST by MozarkDawg
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To: martin_fierro; SortaBichy; Delmont

I'm waiting to see who's on the "Wanker Ping List"....and NO, I don't want on....


66 posted on 02/15/2006 5:57:45 PM PST by ErnBatavia (Meep Meep)
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To: MississippiDeltaDawg
But rosie you’re all right -- you wear my ring When you hold me tight -- rosie that’s my thing When you turn out the light -- I’ve got to hand it to me Looks like it’s me and you again tonight rosie

Actual song playing in the background.

67 posted on 02/15/2006 6:00:34 PM PST by BushCountry (They say the world has become too complex for simple answers. They are wrong.)
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To: Horatio Gates

Sauce??????????


68 posted on 02/15/2006 6:16:46 PM PST by GregB
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To: Red Badger

The older I get the more things I don't understand.

Two today: This guy and the gerbil thing.


69 posted on 02/15/2006 6:19:18 PM PST by bannie (The government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend upon the support of Paul.)
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To: BushCountry

Whaaaaats the matter Annndrew?

Mmmmmy momma said if I ever did anything like this I'd turn to stone.

And?

I'm getting real hard right now!!!!!

Bada Bing.


70 posted on 02/15/2006 6:21:47 PM PST by tet68 ( " We would not die in that man's company, that fears his fellowship to die with us...." Henry V.)
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To: Red Badger

Come on, someone here can certainly place ALGORe's Face
on that pic, I mean even Rolling Stone could do THAT!


71 posted on 02/15/2006 6:23:04 PM PST by tet68 ( " We would not die in that man's company, that fears his fellowship to die with us...." Henry V.)
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To: Millee

Didn't he know that,"Tis better to cast your seed
into the belly of a whore, than on unfertile ground"?

O Nan stop, you're killing me.

Talk to the hand...

Salrite? Sokay!
Was it good for you?


72 posted on 02/15/2006 6:26:15 PM PST by tet68 ( " We would not die in that man's company, that fears his fellowship to die with us...." Henry V.)
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To: Red Badger
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Torino 2006

British spies caught 'red-handed' with rock: Russia

Russia's main intelligence agency says it has caught four British diplomats in a spy scheme worthy of James Bond for its use of bizarre gadgetry.

According to Russian television reports, a piece of equipment that can store and exchange classified information was hidden in a fake rock in Moscow Square, allowing alleged spies to upload and download information in broad daylight while appearing to do nothing more innocuous than use a cellphone or Blackberry.

Russia's spy agency claims British diplomats planted this fake rock containing espionage equipment.

Russia's Foreign Security Service, which called the spy rock "absolutely new spy technology," has also accused British diplomats of channelling funds to non-governmental organizations, NGOs, including one of the country's best-known human rights watchdogs.

On Sunday, Russian state television broadcast video that showed four British Embassy staff allegedly walking up to a rock to retrieve intelligence that had been uploaded by Russian agents.

"This is the first time we literally caught them red-handed in the process of contacting their agents here and received evidence that they finance a number of non-governmental organizations," security service spokesman Sergei Ignatchenko told the ITAR-Tass news agency.

Britain's Foreign Office has denied any improper conduct with Russian NGOs or fake rocks.

Russia's spy agency, which is a successor to the Soviet-era KGB, has had tempestuous relations with other foreign intelligence services, specifically accusing the U.S. and Britain of using NGOs to spy on Russia in an attempt to foment political upheaval in ex-Soviet republics.

The current spy crisis will be resolved "at a political level," possibly by expelling the British agents, said Ignatchenko.

Black and white footage of the rock allegedly being retrieved.

NGO members say Russia's allegations are just an attempt to justify a crackdown on their groups.

"This is an attempt to smear a well-known group with allegations of involvement in espionage activity," said Lyudmila Alexeyeva, a spokeswoman for Moscow Helsinki Group, a persistent critic of President Vladimir Putin.

"They are preparing public opinion for a government move to close us down, which they can now do under the new law."





VIDEO: Don Murray reports for CBC-TV
(Runs 2:00)

 RealVideo
 Quicktime




73 posted on 02/15/2006 6:37:00 PM PST by Hunble
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To: Red Badger; All
Gives whole new meaning to "Getting his rocks off!"......

I hear he just wanted a partner who would stay hard?

MoonRaper

Dr. No-No.

Rocktopussy.

The Earth is Not Enough

A View to a Spill

To Russia With Love

Did Austin Powers have any comment?

74 posted on 02/15/2006 7:07:50 PM PST by grey_whiskers (The opinions are solely those of the author and are subject to change without notice.)
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To: 1riot1ranger; al baby; albee; Argh; beaureguard; bedolido; Bella_Bru; beyond the sea; CholeraJoe; ..
Salacious Ping List ping!
75 posted on 02/15/2006 7:09:30 PM PST by Xenalyte (Can you count, suckas? I say the future is ours . . . if you can count.)
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To: Xenalyte

76 posted on 02/15/2006 7:16:05 PM PST by presidio9 ("Bird Flu" is the new Y2K Virus -Only without the inconvenient deadline.)
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To: presidio9

I don't care who y'are . . . that's funny right there!


77 posted on 02/15/2006 7:20:14 PM PST by Xenalyte (Can you count, suckas? I say the future is ours . . . if you can count.)
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To: GregB
Thats sort of gross.

But still damn funny...LOL!

78 posted on 02/15/2006 9:05:06 PM PST by Horatio Gates (Infidel since 1965)
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To: martin_fierro; Red Badger

79 posted on 02/16/2006 2:08:35 AM PST by Watery Tart (All we are saying is "Give Pizza Chants." -- dfwgator ) ( I'd like a large, with whirled peas....)
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To: Red Badger

They sure it wasn't this Stone?

.

80 posted on 02/16/2006 4:59:46 AM PST by Fintan (Shut up. You're rude and silly. And ugly.)
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