Posted on 06/30/2020 7:50:50 AM PDT by JAG 5000
This piece below is 100% fun lunacy.
If you are not in the mood to read an absurd pointless piece, then read no further . . .
___________
"There is good solid evidence for the reality of UFO's", say some people.
My reply to them is this:
____________
I believe in UFO's.
Just yesterday my wife and I were out in the back yard when an Unidentified Flying Object
landed on our patio table as we were relaxing sipping tea.
Good Lands! I exclaimed, what can that be?
My wife immediately recognized it as a UFO.
I noticed that it was about 10 inches long and about 5 inches wide.
It made a humming sound as it landed.
The humming sound continued for about 3 minutes and then began to slowly die down.
We didn't know what to think about that, so we just sat there flabbergasted and bewildered staring at the UFO.
Suddenly we saw the door in the side of the UFO open, and out stepped 3 little orange colored men about 2 inches tall.
One of them said Hello JAG, how are you?
I'm doing just fine. I replied, and I hope you are doing well yourself.
Listen I said, is that a spaceship you all just landed on my patio table?
Yes it is, said one of the little orange men.
Then they introduced themselves.
The one who first spoke to me said he was the leader and that his name was Qzxzzxzzxzqqqxq, but I could just call him
Bob, because that would make things much less complicated.
The other two introduced themselves as Henry and Tom.
Okay I said, and by the way, where are you all from?
We're from the Andromeda Galaxy some 2.5 million light years from Earth, said Bob.
Well I said, that's interesting Bob. What planet are you from?
Sorry, replied Bob, but we can't tell you that, its classified.
Okay Bob I said, can you tell me why you all have landed your spaceship on my patio table?
We were sent to Earth just to see you JAG, said Henry.
Good lands! I replied, why me? Why would you travel all that distance just to see me?
We came to tell you that Donald Trump is not really an Earthling.
What? I exclaimed, you mean he's not one of us?
That's right, said Henry.
Donald Trump is from another planet and he was sent here to Earth to prepare you Earthlings
for more and more friendly visits from we visitors from Outer Space.
Really? I exclaimed, You mean they're coming here to be our friends? To help us?
Yes indeed, replied Bob. There is a lot we know that can help you Earthlings, a whole lot.
Can you give me an example, I asked.
Sure I can, replied Bob. You JAG are a Republican , and we can tell you that we know for an
absolute fact, that Republicanism is the absolute truth.
I always knew it was, I replied, but it makes my heart glad to hear it from you good folks out there in the Andromeda Galaxy.
What else can you tell me that will cheer my heart, I asked.
We can tell you JAG, that you are a solid gold human being, and we have great hopes for you.
Thank you very much I replied, and may the Force be with you.
Thanks JAG, and may the Force be with you too, and the wifey as well.
My wife smiled at hearing that, and said, "Thanks guys, much appreciated."
Well, said Bob, we have to be getting on back home. It was nice chatting with you JAG, and we'll be in touch.
Sounds good to me, you all take care now.
Goodbye JAG.
So long fellows, I said.
Then Bob, and Tom, and Henry returned to their spaceship and took off into the blue yonder.
The End.
_______
LOL
Scot Me Up Beamy.
``````
``````
```````
Funny.
I’ve always thought it odd that people claim to ‘believe’ in something which by definition is unidentified.
I like Jacques Valee’s quip - ‘I’m the only ufologist who doesn’t know what UFOs are.’
How much Tequila did you drink?
The one that landed in my backyard came tromping down the ramp with a clip board.
He stopped at the bottom, looked at me and then his clip board,
“Arthur Dent?.....Arther PHILLIP Dent?”
I said:”No.”
He said “#@!###@!”
He turned around and tromped back up the ramp and took off.
The only reason I remember it was because he crushed my peonie bushes.
Oh boy....sounds like another multi-thousand post thread has just given birth.....like the “toilet licker covid” post/thread.
So what’s the punch line?
A joke has a punch line. This story is not identified as a joke but as "100% fun lunacy" and "an absurd pointless piece"
So...I don't know.
I have an opposite take on it. Scratch the term, “believe in.” That applies to things that are unseen. The correct question is, do you believe they exist? The answer, of course, is YES. People see objects in the sky that are “flying.” If you can’t identify what they are, the are unidentified flying objects. To deny them would be insanity.
Whether or not they come from another planet, that’s a whole other question.
The best answer as to what UFOs are may well be “all of the above.”
“So what’s the punch line?”___Vigilante2
___________
Ahh, no punch line.
Remember the first two lines of the piece?
JAG Wrote:
This piece below is 100% fun lunacy.
If you are not in the mood to read an
absurd pointless piece, then read no further”__JAG
“an absurd pointless piece ___JAG
`
“Funny.
I’ve always thought it odd that people claim to ‘believe’ in something which by definition is unidentified.
I like Jacques Valee’s quip - ‘I’m the only ufologist who doesn’t know what UFOs are.’”___Jamestown
______
Cool.
You found it funny. I’m glad.
I am always glad to make at least some 0.001
measurable amount of contribution, in some
small way to other people. “Funny” works for me.
JAG
I don’t know what they are, but there are strange things flying around.
Around 1974 or so my father and I witnessed a UFO. It was about 100 yards ahead of us, crossed from our right to our left, about 50 feet up. The object was very bright. We were east of it, it was dusk, and it wasn’t flying all that fast at first. As it approached a busy road it swooped up to the south and flew out of sight in a matter of seconds.
I don’t have the faintest idea what it was. It was solid, it was quiet, it looked like a slightly flattened sphere. There were no fins or wings. It accelerated faster than anything I have ever seen before or since.
“How much Tequila did you drink?”___Mene
__________
Points:
* I ain’t about to type your whole screen names
into this posting block.
* I don’t drink spirits.
* What is there about an announced absurd pointless
story that makes you think spirits could have been
involved?
Do you believe in UFO’s?
Do you believe that the United States Government
has captured aliens and has them locked up in secret
places? , , , LOL , , ,
Best
JAG
This was an amazing UFO sighting—lots of witnesses—and .gov made up hilarious explanations to try to silence them:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1952_Washington,_D.C._UFO_incident
Just for humor JAG. Use “MMTU” when responding if you wish. A lot do. :)
“Hey relax Mr.GG2 thinks JFK jr is still alive and will be brought forward at the GOP convention to replace Pence as Vice President for 2020. ___Georgia Girl 2
___________
Georgia Girl 2,
* Cool
* All this is in fun.
* Do you believe that The United States Government
is putting chemicals in our drinking water, in an effort
to control the American population? , , , LOL , , ,
* Scott Me Up Beamy
Best.
JAG
PS
Elvis is still alive.
I talked to him yesterday in Walmart’s :-)
````
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.