Free Republic 4th Qtr 2024 Fundraising Target: $81,000 Receipts & Pledges to-date: $12,709
15%  
Woo hoo!! And our first 15% is in!! Thank you all very much!! God bless.

Keyword: penguinhumor

Brevity: Headers | « Text »
  • Just received a visit from the FBI

    07/30/2011 6:17:27 PM PDT · by jongaltsr · 1,943 replies
    7/30/2011 | John Galt - psuedoname
    A couple of hours ago receive a hard knock on the door. I answered the door and about 7 or 8 agents all flashing badges (claiming to be FBI and/or CIA) rushed me and pushed me against the far wall. My dog attacked and they would have shot him had I not broken free for a second and covered him by laying him on the floor beneath me. After things calmed down a bit and I received assurances that nothing would happen to him if I placed him in the bedroom and closed the door. I did so and they...
  • Tax the Super Rich now or face a revolution

    03/29/2011 8:57:23 PM PDT · by Christus_Rex · 1,264 replies
    Market Watch ^ | March 29, 2011 | Paul B. Farrell
    Yes, tax the Super Rich. Tax them now. Before the other 99% rise up, trigger a new American Revolution, a meltdown and the Great Depression 2. We know the Super Rich don’t care. Not about you. Nor the American public. They can’t see. Can’t hear. Stay trapped in their Forbes-400 bubble. An echo chamber that isolates them. They see the public as faceless workers, customers, taxpayers. See GOP power on the ascent. Reaganomics is back. Unions on the run. Clueless masses are easily manipulated. Even Obama is secretly working with the GOP, will never touch his Super Rich donors. Yes,...
  • Reagan birth centennial stamp debuts

    12/13/2010 12:06:08 PM PST · by jazusamo · 2,579 replies
    The Washington Times ^ | December 13, 2010 | Mark A. Kellner
    If it was "morning in America" for President Ronald Reagan, a new commemorative postage stamp due in February to mark "the Gipper's" birth centennial will forever view the sunrise.The new commemorative stamp, whose design was unveiled Monday at the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library in Simi Valley, Calif., always will be valid for a 1-ounce first-class letter, the U.S. Postal Service confirmed. It officially will be released at the library on Feb. 10, 2011, four days after the 100th anniversary of Reagan's birth.Texas artist Bart Forbes did the portrait, based on a 1985 photograph of Reagan taken at Rancho del Cielo,...
  • Lightning Rod Gets The Zot

    10/23/2010 5:17:52 PM PDT · by Lrod · 2,071 replies · 2+ views
    The Poet's Eye ^ | Lightning Rod
    A character like Christine O'Donnell presents a unique problem for a humorist. Few elaborations are called for since the caricature is self-embodied. All that is needed is a dead-pan Jack Benny look. You know, the one where he just stares blankly at the audience without saying a word and eventually someone titters and before you know it the whole place is in hysterics? Her very existence as a major party candidate for US Senate is the kind of comedy which arrives ready-written and would only be spoiled by embellishment. I mean, what can you add to rabidantimasturbationtarianism, rats with fully-functioning...
  • The New Dichotomy

    08/31/2010 9:33:48 PM PDT · by citizenredstater9271 · 7 replies
    An insight into how liberals and conservatives differ not just in politics but also ways of thinking.
  • The Ground ZOT mosque must be built!!!!

    08/18/2010 6:30:21 AM PDT · by detritus · 1,590 replies · 1+ views
    The Washington Post ^ | 8/18/10 | Kathleen Parker
    It is hard to imagine that anything has gone unsaid about the so-called Ground Zero mosque, but an important point seems to be missing. The mosque should be built precisely because we don't like the idea very much. We don't need constitutional protections to be agreeable, after all. This point surpasses even all the obvious reasons for allowing the mosque, principally that there's no law against it. Precluding any such law, we let people worship when and where they please. That it hurts some people's feelings is, well, irrelevant in a nation of laws. And, really, don't we want to...
  • Religious, Comments

    08/16/2010 6:38:53 PM PDT · by learner · 287 replies · 3+ views
    Learner | August 16,2010 | Learner
    I am sick and tired of this site being taken over by Catholics ( of which I am one ) stories or proverbs. This is a news site not a religion site. Go do that somewhere else. I am not opposed to your prostilazion(sp), just not here. We lose credibility if any religious group dictates or can be quoted from this site. As a long term member of this site I regret posting this information, but the site has been buried in Catholic stuff recently and it should be shunted to some separate page.
  • What my plan was when I created the ZOT

    06/28/2010 12:43:57 PM PDT · by DagonofAlbion · 3,391 replies · 23+ views
    (and how I ended up) ^ | June 28, 2010 | Lord Dagon
    I deposit the Risk into the account of a dummy finance company for management, called the republican party. Then, I deposit the damage into the account of a dummy corporation for control, called the democratic party. I leave all the bible belt religions as spoilers, or third parties; putting them down as department store chains. To stave off the profit into the mints money burning facility, to insure that the money is worthless in terms of pragmatic value, and is only practical believed values. And the Black market is pimped as bad but, even losing even your kindeys in a...
  • I just switched from Republican to Democrat (Viking Kitties secretly switched his meds)

    05/08/2010 7:40:36 AM PDT · by RubberPig · 1,614 replies · 9,435+ views
    <p>I just switched from pro life to pro choice and from pro gun to anti gun. I've always supported amnesty for illegal aliens.</p>
  • what is the topic for this paragraph ? ZOT!

    04/06/2010 4:19:52 PM PDT · by Ms. Petite · 1,576 replies · 8,727+ views
    me
    Weird stuff seems to go with major comets. When a comet appeared in A.D. 60, the people of Rome assumed it meant the impending death of their still new emperor, Nero. He responded by exiling a potential rival. When another comet turned up just 4 years later, ancient historians say he ordered the execution of dozens of nobles. It is said that Moctezuma II saw a comet in 1517 that foreshadowed the downfall of Aztec empire. In 1910, a wave of hysteria swept over the United States amid reports that Earth was about to pass through Halley's tail.
  • Kitteh military for the first time published shock screens of zotting of [undead] Chicom Troll

    02/26/2010 6:12:28 PM PST · by wuxinghongqi · 1,689 replies · 10,189+ views
    China Military Report ^ | February 26, 2010 | Wuxinghongqi
    February 24, suddenly Chinese official media CCTV for the first time published shock screens of shooting down U-2 high-altitude reconnaissance aircraft in June 1958, to warn B-2 of the United Stites. In these short-range high-definition screens, the moment of Sam missile into the sky shot down U-2 high-definition instant pictures are very stunning!
  • Global Zotting | Kittenitis.com

    12/28/2009 9:44:19 AM PST · by asimshah · 1,847 replies · 12,898+ views
    EnvironmentPK.com ^ | 28/12/09 | Asim Shah
    While some would alarm all-around abating a theory, others would alarm it a accurate set of facts. Opinions alter vehemently. Let us accede all-around abating to be both a apriorism that the ambiance of the apple as we apperceive it is slowly, but actual absolutely accretion in all-embracing air and baptize temperature, and a affiance that if whatever is causing this trend is not disconnected or challenged activity on apple will dynamically be affected.
  • INCOMING MESSAGE FROM THE YEAR ZOT!!!!!

    08/08/2009 4:31:06 PM PDT · by ifonlyallusawerenyc · 1,371 replies · 13,286+ views
    Starbase 5 Proxima 7 ^ | 5/3/51 | DR Roth
    HELLO!? Is this thing on? Good! Listen! Don't vote for Sarah Palin In 2012! America is attacked in 2013 she uses FEMA to lock up her oppenents and then takes over the world! Also they find a cure for Down syndrome and Trig becomes a brutal dictator killing billions! This helps Michelle Obama XII Become intergalactic dictator. Please don't vote for... OMG! Someones coming!
  • Does FR need a ZOT category? (Vanity)

    07/16/2009 6:55:39 PM PDT · by Danae · 1,424 replies · 11,714+ views
    Free Republic ^ | 7-16-2009 | Danae
    I have a wee tiny suggestion for Free Republic. Is it at all possible to have a ZOT category, just as for General chat, or smokey back room? It would be genuinely nice to have a place where the shame of so many trolls could be put on public display! Thanks Mods!
  • Am I the Only One who is sick and tired of "I'd Hit It"?

    04/20/2007 11:50:28 AM PDT · by CharlesWayneCT · 2,302 replies · 43,499+ views
    VANITY | TODAY | SELF
    I've never posted a straight Vanity before. But I am sick and tired of this good conservative, generally religious site being overrun by people posting "I'd hit it", whenever a picture of a good-looking girl is displayed. It's demeaning, it's immoral, and I guess I'm just a prude but announcing to the world that you'd like to have sex with a woman based on her picture, like she was some object, hardly seems like the appropriate attitude on a conservative political site. But rather than post in response to any particular person, I figured I'd just vent here where everybody...
  • (Personal, Vanity) Looking for A Good Penguin

    05/23/2009 5:33:45 AM PDT · by grey_whiskers · 30 replies · 944+ views
    self ^ | 5-23-2009 | grey_whiskers
    This is a personal request, not an article. I'm looking for thoughts by FReepers who know what the hell they're talking about, not flamewars. I have a Mac (love it) and a Windows (XP, whatever the latest service pack is). Have the following questions. 1) I want to do backups of the Mac. What is a good website or source (explicit page reference!) to the Time Machine utility? 1a) Where can I find the logfile to see who is attempting to access my Mac? (The PC has several anti-virus products and firewalls on it already.) 2) I want to do...
  • Can anyone define these sentences for me: “Ego venit , ego posteri , ego eram zotted.”

    04/12/2009 12:15:48 PM PDT · by 1believer · 1,977 replies · 15,829+ views
    # De Principiis Cogitandi. Liber Secundus. (1 result) 11 Visa tamen tardi demum inclementia morbi # Luna habitabilis (1 result) 24 Visa tibi ante oculos, et nota major imago.
  • Post some good jokes

    03/29/2009 7:41:27 PM PDT · by A_cool_guy · 2,637 replies · 20,989+ views
    I know some jokes, but I don't know any good political jokes!! Could everyone post some good jokes here? Thanks, A_cool_guy
  • Vuokra-asunnon Vuokraaminen Turvallisesti (Zot Okra! Vuo-kitten-esti! Turareg! Turareg!)

    01/29/2009 6:58:27 AM PST · by Newster · 2,579 replies · 16,807+ views
    SuomiVerkossa.com ^ | 29.01.2009 | Newster
    This is about renting a house in Finland and using legal and correct forms to prevent problems. Article is in Finnish. Alla ovat Ympäristöministeriön viimeisimmät viralliset vuokrasopimus mallit. Tiedostot ovat PDF muodossa, joten ne ovat helppo tulostaa taikka tallentaa koneelle. Erittäin hyödyllisiä etenkin tehdessä vuokrasopimusta yksityiseltä yksityiselle.Kiinteistönvälitys toimistoilla, jotka tarjoavat vuokra-asuntoja on yleensä kattavat sopimus pohjat valmiina. Mutta toki niihinkin kannattaa tutustua tarkasti ja kysyä kiinteistönvälittäjältä mikäli jokin asia askarruttaa. Vuokra-sopimus -pohjaAlivuokralais sopimus -pohja VINKKI! Tallenna sopimuksen pohja tietokoneelle painamalla oikeaa hiiren nappia ja valitsemalla Tallenna Kohde nimellä.( Sopimusmallit perustuvat ympäristöministeriön asetuksiin asuinhuoneiston vuokrasopimuksen kaavasta (537/2004) ja alivuokra-asunnon vuokrasopimuksen kaavasta...
  • Hackers Crack Into Texas Road Sign, Warn of Zombies Ahead

    01/28/2009 10:29:13 AM PST · by Domandred · 1,989 replies · 16,757+ views
    Fox News ^ | 1/28/2008 | Joshua Rhett Miller
    Transportation officials in Texas are scrambling to prevent hackers from changing messages on digital road signs after one sign in Austin was altered to read, "Zombies Ahead." Chris Lippincott, director of media relations for the Texas Department of Transportation, confirmed that a portable traffic sign at Lamar Boulevard and West 15th Street, near the University of Texas at Austin, was hacked into during the early hours of Jan. 19. "It was clever, kind of cute, but not what it was intended for," said Lippincott, who saw the sign during his morning commute. "Those signs are deployed for a reason —...