Keyword: obamajokes
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This year on Barack Obama’s birthday a group of Russian activists shined a laser show of Obama fellating a banana on the US Embassy in Moscow.hdi is nothing more than a que
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Don't know if this has ever been shared here before, but I think it's too good to not share. 100 years from now, when everyone alive today is LONG dead (because healthcare is on the express lane to Suckville and life expectancy is shouting "wait for me!") The people of 2113 will need something that can quickly and accurately describe the era of Obama...THIS is that something.
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They’re still having a lot of trouble with Obamacare. First the website had all these glitches, and now people are getting a busy signal when they try to apply over the phone. So you can't use the Internet and you can’t use the phone. And now fax machines are like, "Look who's come crawling back to Mr. Fax Machine." ~ Fallon According to a new report, more than 700 fake Obamacare websites have been created. Security experts say it's simple to identify the phony sites because they are easy to log on to. ~ Leno The Obamacare website is...
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Due to the government shut down....the Silliness Thread has been #barrycaded. ***THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS******THIS***THREAD***IS***CLOSED***DONOTCROSS*** Naw....no amount of barrycading is gonna stop me....Now, as reported at American Glob, Barrycade Earns Entry At Urban Dictionary. The definition seems to fit:1. barrycade 1. A barrier (usually temporary) that exists for no reason.2. A barrier erected for political reasons.“Dude, Obama barrycaded the park.”“Hey, let’s put up some barrycades to keep those World War II veterans away from the open-air World War II Memorial in Washington, D.C., in order to try and score some cheap political points.”What I've been wondering about the barrycades... When the government does something...
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No matter how HORRIFYINGLY PAINFULLY TRAGICALLY AWFUL it really is, it is a MILLION times worse. Then things get *really* tough. After that, HORRIBLE things happen, and then we REALLY get screwed. Immediately following that, the BOTTOM drops out and we are all DEAD, and THEN things get HARD! Once that happens, it signifies the TOTAL collapse of EVERYTHING, and that’s when the CATASTROPHE starts! It’s the sign of the end of EVERYTHING, but after that, comes the TRAGEDY. Then times get DIFFICULT, and things get WORSE, until it’s EXCRUCIATING, but that’s just the beginning, because after that it’s all...
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The folks on Twitter seem to be having a good time with this hash tag: #BarackObamasNextBook: “ Some of the posts... #BarackObamasNextBook “Catcher In the Rear.” "Little Drone on the Prairie" "Little House Going into Foreclosure" "How to fail as President without really trying" Never Get Fox News Pissed At You The Seven Habits of Highly Ineffective People It's Not Easy Being A Puppet. Ban the Gun Slowly "A Purpose Driven Scandal" 50 Shades of How Bush Made Me Do It Zero Dark Sleepy Making a world with no borders Guantanamos! From the Earth to the Choom Not Born with...
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We all know how the president loves a good joke. He's a regular stand up comedian. So, the good folks at Twitter are just trying to help: some of the hashtag- #ObamaJokes Some of the 'postings': Q: Have you heard about McDonald's new Obama Value Meal? A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it. Q: What's the difference between president Obama and God? A: God doesn't think he's the president. Q: How do you starve an Obama supporter? A: Put his food stamps in his work boots. Q: What is another name for...
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They say the truth often comes out in humor. At Saturday’s White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner, President Obama said: … “Some of my former advisers have switched over to the dark side. For example, David Axelrod now works for MSNBC—which is a nice change of pace since MSNBC used to work for David Axelrod.” …
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Currently trending on Twitter: #ObamaGoogleSearchHistory Some of what Obamatron may have been searching for... #ObamaGoogleSearchHistory - What hand to put over heart during national anthem? what dog meats are most tender Where is Wisconsin How do I erase Obama's failures from the Internet? how do you destroy a country How many states are there? How to photoshop fake gun shooting pictures I think my wife is a man Famous things that governments built Who were the United States of America's Founding Fathers? What is Congress? 57 States of America What would Marx do? How much is a Trillion dollars? what...
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I heard this in regards to the slew of state initiatives out there, it applies here too...
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DEBATE THIS! The presidential debate Wednesday night was the most tweeted about event in political history, and, it's still being talked about this morning.Jon Stewart, appearing on Good Morning America today to tout his own upcoming debate (Saturday in Washington) with Bill O'Reilly, assessed President Obama and Mitt Romney."I think we can all be satisfied in this election that no matter what happens, we're going to have an incredibly good-looking president," cracked Stewart. "That was some beefcake up there last night. The two of them. And when they take this thing into the swimsuit competition...."He continued: "There's not a...
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It is day two of the Democratic convention, and apparently they had a huge lighting problem in the convention hall today. They worked all day on it. They still couldn't get President Obama out of Bill Clinton's shadow. ~ Jay LenoThe stoner comedy duo Harold and Kumar are starring in a new promo for the Democratic convention alongside President Obama, which is pretty impressive. The only other person to go from smoking pot with buddies to the White House is President Obama. ~ Jay LenoPresident Obama's re-election campaign said that this year they'll knock on 150 percent more doors...
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Gaffetastic! Where Am I...? During an August 14th speech, Biden attempted to fire-up the audience when he told them: "We need you to go out there and make sure, ladies and gentlemen, that with you, and I mean this: With you, we can win North Carolina again. And if we do, we win the election if we win you." Unfortunately for Biden, the speech was delivered in Danville... Virginia. Who Is He...? One upping himself, the following day the VEEP made another campaign stop at Virginia Tech University in Blacksburg, Va. The former member of Congress seems to have...
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America needs Obama-care like Nancy Pelosi needs a Halloween mask. Q: Have you heard about McDonald's' new Obama Value Meal? A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it. Q: What does Barack Obama call lunch with a convicted felon? A: A fund raiser. Q: What's the difference between Obama's cabinet and a penitentiary? A: One is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers, and threats to society. The other is for housing prisoners. Q: If Nancy Pelosi and Obama were on a boat in the middle of the ocean and it started to sink, who...
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BREAKING: United States will apologize for burying Osama bin Laden at seaA U.S. delegation consisting of President Barack Obama, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, Navy Secretary Ray Mabus, and Admiral Gary Roughead will make an emergency visit to Cape Sounion in Greece to apologize for burying Osama bin Laden's body at sea. It was revealed that the State Department received a very strongly worded complaint along with thinly veiled threats of retaliation against the United States Navy. Although it is generally not the policy of the United States to respond to any threat, the Administration felt it prudent to resolve...
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Since there are so many hilarious (and well done) Photoshops of that infamous staged Consternation Room photo, why not put them all in one place?
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What? I went to Wal-Mart and saw that they had Obama Christmas Tree ornaments….So now it's ok to hang a black man from a tree? Here's some gift ideas for this christmas... Brand New! Hot Item! Bill Of Rights. Civil Liberties. All good things. All important things. All things that are disappearing. The Disappearing Civil Liberties Mug features the full text of the Bill Of Rights - add hot water and watch your Civil Liberties disappear and see what you are left with after the Patriotic Act. Great way to remember what's important and why it's so important to...
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What's scarier than being a Democrat this Election Day? A farmer finally decided to buy a TV. The store assured him that they would install the antenna and TV the next day. The next evening the farmer turned on his new TV and found only political ads on every channel. The next morning he turned the TV on and found only political ads again. When he came in to eat lunch he tried the TV again but still only found political ads. The next day when he still found only political ads he called the store to complain. The...
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Do You Suffer from Some of These Top 10 Signs of a Clueless American Voter? 10. You think Goldman Sachs is a department store, and AIG is just the text-message abbreviation for "all is good." 9. You're still checking the mail for your portion of that government stimulus plan. 8. You're not sure if Independence Day is the same holiday as the Fourth of July. 7. You can recite all the words to your favorite rock group's songs, but you don't know what's really in the First Amendment freedom of religion clause. 6. You can name every American Idol...
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("...wearing a bow tie similar to Supreme Court Justice John Paul Stevens, tapes a message regarding the justice's retirement in the Map Room of the White House")with Bobby Jindal.
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