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  • Win or lose, Bush wins; (fudge numbers as needed) WARNING Major BARF Alert!

    09/26/2004 1:28:14 PM PDT · by ADemocratNoMore · 33 replies · 893+ views
    Cleveland Plain Dealer ^ | Sunday, September 26, 2004 | Tom Brazaitis
    Florida's former election czar Katherine Harris will break all ties in favor of the Republican candidate. For instance, if Kerry gets 2.4 million more votes than Bush, Bush will be awarded a mulligan worth 2.5 million votes. Kerry's votes will be "lost," if you know what we mean. In the unlikely event of a tie, Bush wins. In case Bush loses, Bush wins. Previously uncounted Bush votes will be found in an Iowa pasture three weeks after the polls close. Ms. Harris, strictly following election procedure, will declare Bush the winner. Kerry will be exiled to Nantucket