I have discovered the ultimate weapon against any TSA screener who wants to cop a cheap feel as I fly during the Thanksgiving holiday. The weapon is Kielbasa. It's Aunt Blogdona’s annual Thanksgiving treat of kielbasa and sautéed onion borsch. One bowl of this stuff in an untrained bowel and your gut produces enough gas to drive the family car home from Hamtramck, Michigan to Cedar Rapids, Iowa. If the EPA ever smelled this stuff, everyone’s arse would have to be pasted with federally-mandated warning stickers. If a lawyer from the EU ever smelled it in a closed room, Auntie...