“One of the first things you have to do to give someone permission to change their mind, is to lower their defences and prevent them from digging their heels in to the position they already staked out,” Marman told SBS. “If I immediately start to tell you all the ways in which you’re wrong, there’s no incentive for you to co-operate. But if I start by saying, ‘Ah yeah, you made a couple of really good points here, I think these are important issues,’ now you’re giving the other party a reason to want to co-operate as part of the...