SUNRISE, FL — Residents of The Great White North exploded into celebration once again last night, as Canada continued its time-honored tradition of being worse than the United States at everything. The latest installment of the 158-year tradition came Tuesday night, as the Edmonton Oilers once again lost in the NHL Stanley Cup Finals to the Florida Panthers, once again solidifying Canada's status as being inferior to the U.S. in every way. "We weren't sure if we could get crushed by a team whose state doesn't even have ice, but we did it!" said Edmonton center Connor McDavid. "It looked...