Free Republic 3rd quarter FReepathon underway! - Thread 3

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[Quilla]

[RottiBiz]

Thanks for the bump, jjm2111.

Thanks, also, for being a Free Republic donor.

Your support is very much appreciated!

[Grampa Dave]

First of all refusing these thug nations membership in the new unUN would be a big blow to their fragile Euro and Islamofascist egos.

Then we could document their crimes against humanity under the guise of being a UN leader and try their leaders for real war crimes. We would just send SPEC Op SWAT teams to yank them out of their countries and bring them to the unUN for war crime trials.

Of course we would send a Girl Scout troop to France for surrender of their entire miserable country and demand ChIraq and other French War Criminals be flown over here at their expense for trial re selling WMD stuff to Iraq, Syria and Iran.

[Mo1]

Go for the smokes

FNC News Alert .. the generator room at the St. Louis Arch is on fire

[justshe]

Two podiatrists opened their offices on the same street. They were arch enemies.

[justshe]

Q: What's the difference between zombies?
A: Zombies make honey, and zombies don't.

[justshe]

These are my summer clothes. Summer paid for, summer not.

[Fawnn]

Not sure I agree with the author of the quote. I love puns, and the worse they are the more I love them - primarily because I can't come up with them myself!!!!

And what is this? "I didn't even try to catchup on what I missed since Monday night when I got on this morning."

Methinks you berry much relish the thought of trying to crab some attention. Lettuce all agree on that!

(I find it easier to lob puns into typed sentences than to come up with them in what passes for my normal conversation. ... My all-time personal favorite that I hope doesn't need context: Innuendo and out the other.) ;)

[justshe]

And in the stock market today, helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationary.

[Fawnn]

Of course we would send a Girl Scout troop to France for surrender of their entire miserable country....

And the Salvation Army at our northern border should be sufficient to keep the French-speaking ones there in line. ;)

[Gabz]

LOL!!!

My decision wasn't between the smokes or the groceries - but about staying inside or going out for the other things!!!!

I guess the store wins - If I go now I can stop and pay the cable bill, stop and have a beer, go to the supermarket, stop and have another beer and still be able to pick the kidlet up on time!!!!

And then I've got her home to help put away the groceries!!!!!

[Gabz]

That'll do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Fawnn]

Three hits in a row! Bases loaded!!!

[Grampa Dave]

If the Salvation Army did that, I would increase our monthly and yearly donations to them.

[Gabz]

LOL!!!!!

That was a typo - pure and simple!!!!!

But I agree, typed puns are much easier than spoken ones!!!

[justshe]

I've been cloned.

[Fawnn]

One liberal's excuse(s) for not being able to keep a job:

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate.

Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.

After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it. The job was only so-so anyhow.

Next I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was
exhausting.

I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn't cut it.

I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I
couldn't cut the mustard.

My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't note worthy.

I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.

Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried, but I just didn't fit in.

I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.

I thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell.

I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance
company, but the work was just too draining.

My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit, because it was always the same old grind.

After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian, until I realized there was no future in it.

[NormsRevenge]

I sure hope that thing has AC .. can you imagine being stuck in that box for hours on end ..

Does it have any windows?

No, but it has an aquarium :-|| .. Just kidding.

Go fish : Colorful parrot fish swim in a tank during a fish show in Taipei. (AFP/Sam Yeh)

[Gabz]

BWAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

OK - That's it for me - I've got to get to the grocery store before it gets so late that I will have to take the kidlet with me!!!

See you all a little later.

[Mo1]

FOFL!!