Posted on 11/08/2005 8:01:14 AM PST by TBP
Before the divorce rate began its inexorable rise in the late 1960s, the common wisdom had been that, where children are concerned, divorce itself is a problem. But as it became widespread -- peaking at almost one in two first marriages in the mid-1980s -- popular thinking morphed into a new, adult-friendly idea: It's not the act of divorcing that's the problem, but simply the way that parents handle it.
(Excerpt) Read more at washingtonpost.com ...
divorce lawyers only.
I am going through a so called friendly divorce now. We had no major conflicts, didn't argue. Just didn't communicate at all. It has totally devastated my step daughter because she didn't see it coming.
however, I am not going to be friends with my future X. If she doesn't want to be married to me, then I see no need to be a part of her life at all. Holidays or not.
My maternal grandmother lived with a man who I consider my grandpa for over 30 years they never married because of financial issues and my grandma being left with 5 kids during deprression time, they are both deceased, and I am Sure without a doubt they are in heaven.
Womens Lib has taught young women that men are expendable and Bill Clinton showed young men that infidelity towards your wife is no big deal. The joke 90% of all divorce is caused by marriage is almost true.
When values, morals, principles, virtues, accountability, responsibility, faith, reliability and commitment don't exist in a relationship it will be the end of marriage as we have ever known it.
Love is grand Divorce is a $ hundred grand.
"Also, I like Dr. Laura's rules.....only 3 reasons for divorce.....ABUSE, ADDICTION (Uncured), and ADULTERY."
I'm Jewish too, and agree with her reasoning. I have also heard her add "abandonment" to the A-list. I assure you, it can take this form in many ways, i.e. just never being there for school events, regular religious services, birthdays, etc. Another sage item she adds is don't marry in your early 20s. I hope my children will learn from my experience.
Agreed, but then you have the folks who have the children first and the claim is made that the marriage then provides for stability.
Have you checked your pulse lately? Sure you're still alive? Or human? *LOL*
So your step daughter's mother is SELFISH.....I encourage you to stay a "friend" of your step daughter.....only if to help her be able to learn what MARRIAGE REALLY IS....COMMITTMENT!
I don't want to have to pick up a bad habit to get a divorce.
It may seem good to you, but your children deserved an intact biological family. A husband being gone a lot is not abandonment and until you remarried your children had hope for improvement in his behaviors. As did you.
I am divorced and speak from experience of abuse, addiction, adultery and abandonment.
I'm not so sure you will have to suffer God's punishment for having this opinion; this has really been a "gray area" for many Christians. In the Bible, the dad or his servant brought the prospective wife home, he took her into the tent and consummated the marriage. Done deal. (Just think how much was saved on the rehearsal dinner and wedding.)
But, having said that, it is plain from The Scriptures that there were certain laws, customs, ceremonies, etc. that determined that a man and woman were legally married. I could cite numerous Scriptures but no time or space to do so. Bottom Line: I think that we must "render unto Caesar what is Caesar's and unto God what is God's." (Matthew 22:21). Why not just do it right and have a clear conscience before God. The Marriage License isn't that expensive.
Agreed...although perhaps a Christian perspective would read "before God and Other Christians"...
Certainly, introducing the State into something that's a religious matter was a terrible mistake.
Remain friends with your step child, but don't bother with your ex other than to be "cordial". If you had communication problems before, they won't improve with distance. I tried for years to save my marriage, encourage counseling, bring in religious support to no avail. Keep your dignity, keep it clean and if you can let that child know you'll always be there.
I do not beleive you need to be married in a *Church* you can have your own ceremony between yourself that other person and GOD. I will tell you this if I was in my 50's 60's and I was alone and met a man that I wanted to be with intimately and share part of my life I would not marry in the legal sesne, although I would want to maybe have some sacrament of togetherness with him and GOD.
Thank you....
I feared someone would point to the verb "is" and say that "who" is correct. As your sentence inversion exercise shows, "is" is the verb associated with the word "divorce".
BTW, your inversion rule is grammatically sound.
bump
later pingout.
"It may seem good to you, but your children deserved an intact biological family. A husband being gone a lot is not abandonment and until you remarried your children had hope for improvement in his behaviors. As did you."
Kind person, you make a lot of assumptions. Divorce came after years of trying to reconcile, accommodating and making excuses for my children's natural father. I can give you three good reasons that my new marriage will endure:
- regular religious attendance (did not, would not happen in my previous situation)
- two meals a day, whole family sit down and talk - breakfast and dinner, home made, courtesy of their new father
- shared traditional values
I grew up in a home where my parents stayed together. Things were broken and thrown and there were no attempts at improvement. I am a religious person and feel strongly that divorce is allowed - yes even in the Bible - because when once has given their situation due diligence, sometimes you need to move on.
On a personal note, I believe my husband was a gift sent to me from on high because I had the faith and strength to do the right thing.
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