9 Things Men Are Better At Than Women

The Bee ^ | Jul 21, 2026 | The Bee

[dayglored]

Women may be the fairer sex, but are they the better sex? Research is conclusive that men are better at quite a few things than women.

Here are just a few examples:

1. Being created: That's right, men were created first. Get wrecked, ladies.

2. Fatherhood: Women are terrible dads.

3. Growing a handlebar mustache and twirling it mischievously: Have you seen the women with mustaches? Not very impressive.

4. Clogging toilets: Also, unclogging toilets.

5. Thinking about Ancient Rome: Research suggests women never think about Ancient Rome, which is literally insane.

6. Being President of the United States: Try harder, women.

7. Moving furniture: Wherever the women say they want it, of course.

8. Getting "that thing" off a high shelf: Who always gets asked to do it? That's right.

9. Common sense and logic: It's science.

And that settles it. What other things are men better at than women?

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TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; men; satire; women

[Jamestown1630]

We might not have so much trouble if guys didn’t always over tighten the lids.

Men can be very heavy handed.

[dayglored]

> Be right back, gonna take a shower...

Back from the shower. Great comments -- I had a hunch this would draw some.

[Old Yeller]

Writing their names in the snow...............

When I was younger, I could print. Now, it’s cursive.

[libstripper]

Best solution is adhesive traps concealed in perforated metal containers. If one isn’t protected, dog or car will try to lick it and get caught.

[BatGuano]

That woman is just full of evil!
BEWARE of Hillary.

[Danie_2023]

10. Fixing things.

11. Procrastinating when asked to fix things.

12. Making excuses for procrastinating when asked to fix things.

13. Eventually getting around to fixing things when asked, but by that time, it no longer matters.

[libstripper]

I have one of those pistols. Horrible stiff trigger.

[muir_redwoods]

I had a hated psychology professor who insisted women were less developed than men because they were subject to huge mood swings by hormonal influence due to their menstrual periods. He mentioned this often.

I, a male, finally put him in his place by simply claiming he was wrong. He asked me why.i told him women are well advanced over men because, after all,

“Women have indoor plumbing”

Nothing conquers pomposity like laughter.

[Jamestown1630]

I bet mens’ peckers have gotten them into as much if not more life changing trouble than our hormones have gotten us.

[GingisK]

Horrible stiff trigger

Get it worked on. It is a remarkably accurate pistol, particularly the bull barrel version.

[mass55th]

Female here too...almost 79. Been opening my own jars for the past 47 years after I divorced my philandering husband. I hit the side of the lid on the top of the counter, or bang the lid with a spoon. That’s enough to loosen the seal and get the lid off.

[mass55th]

Men are better at not seeing things that need to be done, picked up, or put away. They’ll walk right by something on the floor and not bend over and pick it up as they go by. They are also terrible at searching for things. They don’t bother to move things to look for a missing item.

[Vendome]

getting that damn Diet Coke out of the refrigerator, even though she is standing right next to it...

[A_perfect_lady]

No, just the size and scale of the Empire, the governance, the cultural impact, the philosophers, the... all of it.

[TangoLimaSierra]

Imma let that slide.

[Karliner]

Okay, this was the Babylon bee and just a fun thread. Thanks for the depressive reality post:>)

[MountainDad]

Judge’s!!!!

[dayglored]

>> Men are better at not seeing things that need to be done, picked up, or put away. They’ll walk right by something on the floor and not bend over and pick it up as they go by. They are also terrible at searching for things. They don’t bother to move things to look for a missing item.

> Imma let that slide.

Well played.

[Rio]

Vive la difference...

https://babylonbee.com/news/9-things-women-are-better-at-than-men

Here are things women are irrefutably better at than men:

Having X chromosomes: They’re literally twice as good as men are at this.

Growing human beings inside of them: There has yet to be a man to accomplish this feat.

Making sandwiches: This isn’t even close.

Allowing sin into the world: Another historic achievement that has never been matched.

Finding the milk carton in the fridge: Dudes can’t even do it when it’s right in front of them.

Asking for directions when driving: Always willing to get help when they need it.

Giving directions when not driving: Always willing to give help when you don’t need it.

Smelling good: Or even being remotely attractive, for that matter.

Wearing dresses: Have you seen how guys look when they try to do it? Woof.

[GingisK]

Rome was magnificent. I also enjoy studying them. Once I had a complete list of Rome's generals that includes what was known of their lives and adventures. That was interesting reading. Reading about the army's supply and logistics is also eye opening.

Always better to be Roman than one of their slaves. ;-D