10 More Things Trump Plans To Rename

The Bee ^ | Jan 8, 2025 | The Bee

[dayglored]

With less than two weeks remaining before his triumphant return to the Oval Office, Trump is already making big moves, including declaring that the Gulf of Mexico will be renamed the Gulf of America. What other new names does he have up his sleeve?

The Babylon Bee has obtained the following list of other things Trump plans to rename:

1. All USB ports in the country will be renamed "USA Ports": Only patriotic connections for electronic devices from now on.

2. The Statue of Liberty will now be "Lady Melania": The only proper name for the biggest, most beautiful woman in the world.

3. French Fries will now be known as "Florida fries": All restaurants must comply or face the consequences.

4. South America will now be known as "Worse Mexico": There's only room for one America in this world. The right one.

5. New Mexico will be required to call itself "West Texas": No part of the United States should ever be called Mexico.

6. Greenland will now be called "AmericaLand": So much better.

7. Georgia will be required to rename itself South South Carolina: That's for 2020, Georgia.

8. The first country that agrees to rename itself "Trumpistan" gets free NATO membership: Any nation should see the value in this.

9. China will now be spelled "Chy-na" on all world maps: We all say it that way anyway.

10. Tex-Mex cuisine will now be simply "Tex-Tex": Nachos are American now, folks. It's not even January 20th yet, and America can't stop winning. Have your ideas for new names Trump should consider? List them below in the comments.

[dayglored]

And this is only the beginning!!

[Notthereyet]

Wonderful list-! LOL

[Telepathic Intruder]

Greenland should be called MAGA Country from now on.

[wildcard_redneck]

These two are my favorites:

South America will now be known as “Worse Mexico”: There’s only room for one America in this world. The right one.

New Mexico will be required to call itself “West Texas”: No part of the United States should ever be called Mexico.

[Rennes Templar]

“All USB ports in the country will be renamed “USA Ports”

A computer tech guy went to a Trump rally and started a chant: USB! USB!

[FatherofFive]

Democrat Party renamed "DemonRats": Reflects both their master and morals

[j.havenfarm]

Love #4 in particular

[Telepathic Intruder]

Yeah, let them whine about it.

[Teacher317]

Never forget that Democrats mocked and laughed at Sec State William Seward so much that the purchase of Alaska (in 1867 for just $7m) was referred to as "Seward's Folly".

Strange how that turned out really well for the US, and how the Democrats have of course never once admitted their stupidity in opposing the purchase.

Imaging what insulting name that they'll make for any potential purchase of Greenland, and even after the discovery of massive amounts of crucial substances and minerals.

[bgill]

For real, give our military bases their original names and I don’t care how much it costs to change back the letter head.

[ronniesgal]

I wish he’d rename the military bases that were renamed under bidet.

[Telepathic Intruder]

And it’s not like Denmark is going to do anything useful with it anyway.

[Apparatchik]

I think Greenland should be called Redwhiteandblueland.

[No name given]

The lefties will be too ignorant to see it’s just satire.

[albie]

I don’t think the king of Denmark will allow Greenland to go to us. What with the change in coat of arms and all…-sarc

[Telepathic Intruder]

Of course. Unlike them, we can laugh at ourselves. But it’s still more fun laughing at them.

[cnsmom]

Time to rename Michigan to just Mitten.

[Fai Mao]

In the original treaty between Texas and Mexico most of New Mexico was actually West Texas.

[SunkenCiv]

Babylon Bee. Turns out the left is fine with the US' acquisition of Greenland, so long as it's renamed Green New Deal Land.

• [Catholic Caucus] Heretical New Ways Ministry 'delighted' with appointment of pro-LGBT McElroy as DC archbishop [01/09/2025]
  • Time to discard the "Transgender" term. [01/09/2025]
• Huge poll victory for Nigel Farage as Reform comes joint TOP for first time [01/09/2025]
  • The Western Elites Are Fine With Our Own People Being Abused [01/09/2025]
  • Justin Trudeau Resigns as Canada's Prime Minister [01/09/2025]
• A top Iranian general said Russia was actually bombing the empty desert while saying it was attacking Syrian rebels [01/09/2025]
  • Putin propagandist in coma and deemed 'clinically dead' after urging Russia to fire nuclear weapons [01/09/2025]
• Seven Days of Fasting: How Your Body Transforms Inside and Out [01/09/2025]
  • NATIONAL APRICOT DAY - January 9 [01/09/2025]
• Babylon Bee: Biden Issues Imminent Terrorist Threat Warning Due To The 11 Terrorists He Just Released From Prison [01/09/2025]

[KarlInOhio]

Seward was also negotiating with Denmark for the purchase of Greenland and Iceland in the 1860s.