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Panic Erupts On Delta Flight As Captain Of Female Crew Announces That 'Everything's Fine'
The Babylon Bee ^
| March 5, 2023
| The Babylon Bee
Posted on 03/06/2023 9:58:58 AM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
U.S. — A scene of desperation and panic unfolded on a Delta Airlines flight after the captain of the all-female flight crew announced over the intercom that everything was fine.
"Sure, just go on doing whatever you want back there. It's fine," said Captain Savannah Ross with a sigh. "Why wouldn't it be fine?"
The cabin immediately broke into a cacophony of shrieks and prayers, with passengers desperately trying to message loved ones to say goodbye. "We keep asking, but they won't say what's wrong," said Danny Evans, who had managed to reach his wife's phone. "Whatever it is, it must be really bad. We're in trouble, babe."
Passengers continued begging the crew to know what was the matter, but were met with the silent treatment. At last, the Captain returned to the intercom only to say, "You wouldn't understand" — setting off a fresh wave of hysteria.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
TOPICS: Business/Economy; Chit/Chat; Health/Medicine; Humor; Miscellaneous; Society
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; everythingsfine; flightcrew; flying; manosphere; pilots; redpill; satire; women
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
Almost got me 😏..........because it’s so damn Plausible. LOL!
2
posted on
03/06/2023 10:00:59 AM PST
by
V_TWIN
(America...so great even the people that hate it refuse to leave!)
To: V_TWIN
LOL, those people over there are absolultely insane!
Wonderfully so, though...:)
3
posted on
03/06/2023 10:03:30 AM PST
by
rlmorel
("If you think tough men are dangerous, just wait until you see what weak men are capable of." JBP)
Now that is freakin’ funny…everything is fine!
4
posted on
03/06/2023 10:03:36 AM PST
by
dsrtsage
( Complexity is just simple lacking imagination)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
LMAO… jeez, you got me. Hahahahahahaha!!!!
5
posted on
03/06/2023 10:03:58 AM PST
by
Caipirabob
(Communists...Socialists...Fascists & AntiFa...Democrats...Traitors... Who can tell the difference?)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
LOL. A good script for Airplane III with FJB running the control tower and little Peter Buttplug talking to the press about when he plans to fill the potholes in the runways.
6
posted on
03/06/2023 10:07:57 AM PST
by
FlingWingFlyer
("I may be a white boy but I'm not stupid". - FJB at Black "History" event. Tell 'em Jo Jo!)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
Were they really all women? How about the one’s who identify as one?
To: US_MilitaryRules
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
It always reminds me of that Far Side cartoon, which I won't post since Ted Larson has asked people not to post his cartoons...:)
In it, there is an exterior view of an airliner, and the pilot, visible in the cockpit is saying:
"The fuel light's on, Frank! We're all going to die! We're all going to die! Wait...wait...oh! My mistake! That's the intercom light!"
What really makes it funny is the bug-eyed looks on all the passengers looking out the portholes...:)
9
posted on
03/06/2023 10:13:22 AM PST
by
rlmorel
("If you think tough men are dangerous, just wait until you see what weak men are capable of." JBP)
To: US_MilitaryRules
Were they really all women? How about the one’s who identify as one? That would be the drag queen stewardess flouncing out of the cockpit telling passengers they're giving her a headache...
10
posted on
03/06/2023 10:25:20 AM PST
by
GOPJ
( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muw22wTePqQ Gumballs: Immigrants by the numbers.)
To: rlmorel
LOL
i still miss Larson...
11
posted on
03/06/2023 10:32:56 AM PST
by
Chode
(there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
Waiting for someone to post the Kevin Bacon “remain calm” or Leslie Nielsen’s “ Everything is fine” nose-getting-longer photos 😁😆
To: SkyDancer
13
posted on
03/06/2023 10:48:44 AM PST
by
PROCON
(Sic Semper Tyrannis)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
They will just tell the terrified passengers to “CALM DOWN!”
That always works😏
14
posted on
03/06/2023 10:49:38 AM PST
by
9422WMR
(45 1. Lie, cheat, steal. It’s how the democRATS operate. )
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
To: PROCON
LOL Yeah, saw a meme on that.
16
posted on
03/06/2023 10:51:42 AM PST
by
SkyDancer
(Hold on tight to your dream)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
Dang! I’m usually pretty good at spotting the Bee, but it took me to the fourth paragraph before I said, “Wait a minute…” and checked the source. 😄🤦🏻♀️
17
posted on
03/06/2023 10:58:10 AM PST
by
Allegra
To: Caipirabob
18
posted on
03/06/2023 11:15:53 AM PST
by
Does so
("Who is Ray Epps?" should be overstamped on every piece of currency...)
To: Caipirabob
19
posted on
03/06/2023 11:15:55 AM PST
by
Does so
("Who is Ray Epps?" should be overstamped on every piece of currency...)
To: Allegra
Me too, exactly that LOL
20
posted on
03/06/2023 12:00:32 PM PST
by
tomkat
(SOTU = FUBAR)
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