Posted on 07/31/2020 4:58:41 PM PDT by BipolarBob
WASHINGTON, D.C.—President Trump, always desiring to be gracious and fair, suggested delaying the election yesterday until the Dems can find a candidate who can form complete, coherent sentences.
"Look, I want this to be fair," Trump said. "Why don't we push this thing off six months or so? That will give the Dems plenty of time to try to find someone who can go toe to toe with me. It won't be easy. There aren't many. But I'm sure they can find a worthy opponent for me to beat."
Trump was praised for the graciousness and compassion of the move.
"I disagree with Trump on everything, but this was really nice of him," said a DNC spokesperson. "We're going back to the drawing board and trying to find someone who can talk and think and all those qualities you really want in a leader."
The Democrats did manage to locate a few candidates who can string sentences together, but sadly they were all accused of sexual assault, so Trump agreed to give them another six months.
Talk about stupid.
Weekend coming up
He just may very well tweet something like this
LOL
Lol! Good one Babylon Bee! Trump likes a challenge, beating Biden in a debate is like beating up a paraplegic. You might win really easy, but you don’t feel proud of it.
...also more time to find a vice-presidential running mate who’s actually qualified to be veep.
We have such a considerate president!
AOC is very good at stringing words together, and it takes a person several seconds at least to discover how nonsensical the result is. That’s long enough to make it through a debate.
Obama was also a Master of the Sentence when his Teleprompter broke
Nice touch.
What if Biden is doing the greatest Rope a Dope in world history. He shocks the universe with two complete sentences. Donald gets the Apple and is speechless gasping for air. You can hear a mic drop across the country. Forget about it that’s crazy talk. In a way its crazy talk but if Joe can string together a couple of sentences it might look like victory because the bar was lying on the ground. Maybe we should start pumping Joey up just in case the impossible happens.
I love the Babylon Bee. More accurate.
That's true. As much as I enjoy making fun of Biden. If we push the dementia angle and "he can't speak a complete sentence" line too much. Then he goes and puts on a passable performance and manages to make it 90 minutes with only a couple minor gaffs, then he may be perceived by many as the winner simply because they were expecting him to be a complete train wreck and he beat the odds by being merely average.
The Babylon Bee - Tomorrow’s News Today
I just knew it was them when I read the headline.
... “candidate can form coherent sentence ...” ...
So no election until 2024 then?
The ‘rats will demand that the debates be done in Ebonics.
Nice gesture but a waste of time. The Dems don’t have anyone like that.
LOL!? Of course it makes sense for Joe Bee. He’s dirty. He’s inarticulate. He’s a dog-faced pony soldier.
He also is the creator of the AR-14.
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