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How Loneliness Begets Loneliness
Pocket ^ | April 6, 2017 | Olga Khazan, The Atlantic

Posted on 06/28/2019 2:39:19 PM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks

“I’m clearly a textbook case of the silent majority of middle-aged men who won’t admit they’re starved for friendship, even if all signs point to the contrary,” wrote Billy Baker in his recent exploration of male loneliness in The Boston Globe.

Perhaps one reason the piece made so many internet rounds is just how many people could relate: Last year Surgeon General Vivek Murthy warned that Americans are “facing an epidemic of loneliness and social isolation.”

Though “I’m going to die alone” is the common grumble among single people, scientifically, it’s more like, “I’m going to die if I’m alone.” A lack of social connections can spark inflammation and changes in the immune system, so lonely people are far more likely to die prematurely. Loneliness is more dangerous than obesity, and it’s about as deadly as smoking. The threat is considered so serious that England has created an entire “Campaign to End Loneliness.”

But in a cruel twist, the loneliest among us are set up to get lonelier still. People with few social connections experience brain changes that cause them to be more likely to view human faces as threatening, making it harder for them to bond with others.

To learn more about this conundrum, and how to resolve it, I recently spoke with John Cacioppo, a psychologist at the University of Chicago who wrote a book on loneliness and has researched the phenomenon extensively. An edited transcript of our conversation follows.

(Excerpt) Read more at getpocket.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Computers/Internet; Education; Health/Medicine; Hobbies; Miscellaneous; Society
KEYWORDS: connections; loneliness; people; psychology; socialskills
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To: dp0622

You’re never alone if you own cats. Okay, not true, Sometimes the cats ditch you to watch sparrows and then, but ONLY then are you alone. I was gonna say when you’re in the bathroom are you truly alone but my cats insist on being with me during that activity as well.


81 posted on 06/28/2019 7:01:00 PM PDT by Celtic Conservative (My cats are more amusing than 200 channels worth of TV)
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To: Celtic Conservative

Gee, I never even consider shutting the door when it’s just me and the cat.

In case I get bored reading I can pet him :)


82 posted on 06/28/2019 7:19:42 PM PDT by dp0622 (The Left should know if Trump is kicked out of office, it is WAR!)
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To: Rebelbase

83 posted on 06/28/2019 7:22:42 PM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks (Show me the people who own the land, the guns and the money, and I'll show you the people in charge.)
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To: AllAmericanGirl44; Innovative; combat_boots

Thank you all for your kindness. I noticed a reply on the HBOT video. We saw it while eating Thai food after our HBOT today. She will reply later this evening.

Her appetite has been poor, but she ate three egg rolls today and half an order of curry chicken. She has been losing a pound a week for over a year, been stable at 140 now for three weeks.


84 posted on 06/28/2019 8:35:41 PM PDT by JohnnyP (Thinking is hard work (I stole that from Rush).)
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To: dfwgator; ProudGRITS
"Eleanor Rigby" seems to be a song about the terrifying world of espionage.

Father McKenzie is apparently a Soviet spy who has set up a fake church as a "dead drop" for gathering classified information so it can be transferred to Moscow. Eleanor apparently works for the FBI or maybe HUAC and she's on his trail. When we first meet her, she is poking around the church picking up rice, probably to check if any of the rice grains are being used to hide microfilm. The "face that she keeps in a jar by the door" refers to the disguises that she uses as part of her counter-intelligence trade craft.

We later see McKenzie writing a sermon "that no one will hear" because the church is fake, and weaving microfilm into his socks "in the night when there is nobody there."

Unfortunately for Eleanor, the NKVD learns about her activities and she is abducted and liquidated--sharing the fate of victims of Stalinism like Juliet Poyntz, who was apparently abducted and murdered in 1937 just as she was about to blow the whistle on Soviet spying in the US.

The song concludes gloomily with the line "no one was saved," perhaps hinting that McKenzie himself is headed for the Lyubyanka, where so many Soviet espionage agents ended up during the Stalin era.

85 posted on 06/28/2019 8:36:29 PM PDT by Fiji Hill
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To: crosdaddy

Being alone myself and having suffered pet loss, I understand what you are going through. To non pet lovers this is an actual grieving process. Be strong this to shall pass.


86 posted on 06/29/2019 2:57:03 AM PDT by duckman ( Not tired of winning!)
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To: crosdaddy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwGnCIdHQH0

Above is Jimmy Stewart reading a poem (a pretty lousy poem for the most part) about his dog.

But it is touching.

I never got the big deal about somebody losing a dog or cat. Until our first cat died. Just the other day I realized that our dog isn’t going to last forever. :(


87 posted on 06/29/2019 3:04:07 AM PDT by 21twelve (!)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

BFL


88 posted on 06/29/2019 3:18:24 AM PDT by Skooz (Gabba Gabba we accept you we accept you one of us Gabba Gabba we accept you we accept you one of us)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

I deal with people all day, both the good and bad. About 8 years ago I realized it was me picking up the phone to connect with friends, college buddies etc. So I stopped reaching out to see who would call me , and a few did not not most. I’m content being alone most of the time, I’ve developed new hobbies and interests including reading the Harvard Classics and going to Latin Mass which gives me great joy.


89 posted on 06/29/2019 4:57:39 AM PDT by LumberJack53213
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To: JohnnyP

Look up work on intermittent fasting / keto diets and cancer: cancer cannot burn fat and must have carbs.


90 posted on 06/29/2019 5:35:51 AM PDT by grey_whiskers (The opinions are solely those of the author and are subject to change with out notice.)
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To: King Moonracer

I agree.


91 posted on 06/29/2019 5:47:17 AM PDT by wally_bert (Disc jockeys are as intwerchangeable as spark plugs.)
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To: vikingd00d

Doubly so if you have to support them in using basic technology. Especially the titans of management and manufacturing.


92 posted on 06/29/2019 5:49:42 AM PDT by wally_bert (Disc jockeys are as intwerchangeable as spark plugs.)
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To: Fiji Hill

Bookmarked.


93 posted on 06/29/2019 5:52:00 AM PDT by wally_bert (Disc jockeys are as intwerchangeable as spark plugs.)
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To: LumberJack53213

Nobody calls me anyway unless they want something.

Rounds of please help with this or that. No one ever asks me if I use some help with my things.


94 posted on 06/29/2019 6:22:15 AM PDT by wally_bert (Disc jockeys are as intwerchangeable as spark plugs.)
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To: JudyinCanada

Thank you Judy, and I will remember that there is another one out there for me, at some point.


95 posted on 06/29/2019 6:33:20 AM PDT by crosdaddy
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To: Eagles Field

Thanks Eagles, that’s exactly how I feel, when I lost my mom, father, older brother, first wire hair fox terrier in fairly quick succession, (2001-2004), I was in horrible shape from those losses. Unlike what the “experts” say, there is no “closure”, you just learn to live with it, and move forward.i spoiled Winston, then Bentley equally, and God willing there will be a third sometime.


96 posted on 06/29/2019 6:42:48 AM PDT by crosdaddy
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To: duckman

Thanks Duck, I know. It’s just really tuff right now. In the 27 years I lived with my first and second fox terrier I never felt alone in any sense, now, not so much. I’m really kind of lost at home, and as I said before, thank God I’m still working, or I would be in really rough shape.


97 posted on 06/29/2019 6:49:43 AM PDT by crosdaddy
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To: 21twelve

Thank you for that 21twelve, that was very poignant and reflects how I’m feeling right now, still looking for him, hearing him, etc. What great men those two were, by the way.


98 posted on 06/29/2019 7:05:45 AM PDT by crosdaddy
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To: crosdaddy

I know how hard it can be, I feel for you.

I had my little Homer 18 years. She passed 20 years ago. It took several years to not choke up when talking about her.


99 posted on 06/29/2019 8:16:02 AM PDT by JohnnyP (Thinking is hard work (I stole that from Rush).)
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To: grey_whiskers

Thank you, yes we are doing keto, but she cheats a bit. I learned about HBOT from watching Seyfried and D’Agostino.


100 posted on 06/29/2019 8:17:52 AM PDT by JohnnyP (Thinking is hard work (I stole that from Rush).)
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