Posted on 06/28/2019 2:39:19 PM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
“I’m clearly a textbook case of the silent majority of middle-aged men who won’t admit they’re starved for friendship, even if all signs point to the contrary,” wrote Billy Baker in his recent exploration of male loneliness in The Boston Globe.
Perhaps one reason the piece made so many internet rounds is just how many people could relate: Last year Surgeon General Vivek Murthy warned that Americans are “facing an epidemic of loneliness and social isolation.”
Though “I’m going to die alone” is the common grumble among single people, scientifically, it’s more like, “I’m going to die if I’m alone.” A lack of social connections can spark inflammation and changes in the immune system, so lonely people are far more likely to die prematurely. Loneliness is more dangerous than obesity, and it’s about as deadly as smoking. The threat is considered so serious that England has created an entire “Campaign to End Loneliness.”
But in a cruel twist, the loneliest among us are set up to get lonelier still. People with few social connections experience brain changes that cause them to be more likely to view human faces as threatening, making it harder for them to bond with others.
To learn more about this conundrum, and how to resolve it, I recently spoke with John Cacioppo, a psychologist at the University of Chicago who wrote a book on loneliness and has researched the phenomenon extensively. An edited transcript of our conversation follows.
(Excerpt) Read more at getpocket.com ...
I hope and wish the best for your wife and you.
You are doing the right things, researching and exploring all possible help options.
Best wishes to both of you.
I have a lot of pals here on Free Republic.
Just today, one of my buddies said that I was special.
He would know because he was in a lot of Special Education classes.
People are overrated.
I am sorry about your fox terrier pal passing on.
Each pet I’ve owned has it’s own personality. I still miss many of them. Maybe, when you think the time is right, you can offer a loving home to another dog. It’s truly amazing at how ‘loving’ some dogs and cats can seem to human beings.
It’s like a partnership that was meant to be.
Who knows what they really think of us?
I would say become active in a church, there are all kinds of people there and most can find a kindred spirit.
Friends are great. Especially good ones. Got no friends? Count your blessings. Sometimes I hear the phone ring or vibrate and think, “What now? I don’t owe anyone anything.”
“The more powerful and original the mind, the more it will incline towards the religion of solitude.”
- Aldous Huxley
Sometimes you want to go
Where everybody knows your name
And they’re always glad you came
You want to be where you can see
The troubles are all the same
You want to be where everybody knows your name
Thank you, I had a very tight bond with him, as well as the one that preceded him. I’ve always had a great affinity towards dogs, I can’t really see myself without one in the future, but I’m really hurting right now from the loss of this one and I need to fully grieve him. Thank God I’m still working, because as a certified homebody, I can’t stand being in my house right now.
It’s funny, but thanks to Facebook, I have connected with a lot of folks I went to high school with. I wasn’t particularly popular, but I knew of them, and in a way, we’ve actually become close, there is something about having common bonds, and that’s something you lose once you leave high school. I think also serving in the military is another place where life-long bonds are commonly made.
It sure doesn’t happen in the workplace, anymore.
Re: Becoming a regular anywhere invites a new life.
Good insight.
Good epigram.
“People are overrated.”
I’m 59. I have already said everything I need to say and have heard all I want to hear.
Sorry about your pup. Grieve, but remember there are millions of doggies out there who will love you like life itself.
Thanks, I know.
I see by your sign up date you’re another “recount FReeper” from the Gore fiasco. Crazy days here, but lots of fun.
Yep, crazy for sure.
I associate loneliness with young age.
I am an old boy now, living alone, but my health is good, and as long as I have basic cable TV, quiet neighbors, a good Internet connection, and my own bathroom, I never feel unhappy, or bored, or lonely.
I have been politically passionate since I was a child - more Libertarian than Conservative.
I am not religious at all, but I have come to the conclusion that religious passion and political passion occupy the exact same part of the human brain.
“Hell is other people.”
— Jean Paul Sartre
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