ISIS Surrenders in face of Climate Change Conference

Vanity | 12/10/2015 | ArGee

[ArGee]

Raqqa, Syria

Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.

"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."

An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.

Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."

According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.

"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."

So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."

[Monkey Face]

Oh, that is BEAUTIFUL!!!! :o0

[Monkey Face]

I wish! I’m ALWAYS surprised when I buy spices there. I would have bought Spice Islands, or Watkin’s if I had wanted to pay through the nose for the stuff I needed. But the same spices on those brands were almost double the cost of what I paid.

[moose07]

Nice pic, thanks NoC.
Richmond is right by Kew Gardens, west London.
3 miles from Hampton Court Palace.
Errrr, 50 miles east ,along the Thames from me. :)

[moose07]

Eat it just as it is.
The vinegar and Lemon juice has already chemically cooked the meat.
One discovered,never forgotten. :)
Speaking of which, there is some sitting unattended in the fridge right now...

[moose07]

The Camers are everywhere.
They have had no affect on crime levels at all. Just makes it easier for the Police to see things they don’t need to be seeing.
If you stand right underneath one of the poles they very quickly point the camera straight at you....paranoid I guess.....:)

[null and void]

Ah. I assumed that if it had any flavor, you’d have to boil it more...

[moose07]

Your pic? Nice.
I see they had it converted.....to run on industrial nuclear waste.
Wooooo, whooooooo!

[moose07]

The British propensity to render food inedible to the uninitiated tongue?
Those days are long gone. But they are looked back on with some nostalgia. Some specialist cafes do still serve up the traditional delights.

[Monkey Face]

The thunder thingys are starting up again, and I suspect it will be like this for the rest of the next 12 hours. (Just had one hit that was close and extravagantly complicated!)

I probably better shut this down for tonight.

I need to send my first-born grandson a present for his first son, but I have no idea what there is available. I haven’t checked on newborn stuff at Wally’s for a long time... :o[

[moose07]

Stay safe , ,Face.
(((Hugs)))

[NoCmpromiz]

I see they had it converted.....to run on industrial nuclear waste.

Well.. some railroads and/or restorers have converted their steamers to run on oil - Union Pacific for one - if and when their Big Boy they are restoring steams again it will be burning oil. Also many of the northeastern railroads that served the PA coal regions burned the anthracite that came from those mines. While you can get an oil burner or an anthracite burner to emulate a smoke-breathing dragon, it is not as impressive as an original unmodified bituminous coal eating dragon!

As an aside, the Delaware, Lackawanna, and Western Railroad used the clean burning anthracite they used to great effect with their ads for their passenger service because their famed traveler Phoebie Snow could travel on the "Road of Anthracite" wearing her white dresses and not get all black soot covered..

[NoCmpromiz]

you’d have to boil it more... with a lot of this:

[NicknamedBob]

Every time I pass my local McDonald’s, with their sign that says very prominently, “OLD BAY FISH”, ...

... I have to say to myself, “Yeah, if I owned a restaurant, that’s EXACTLY what I would put out on the sign.”

It also reminds me of the epicurean advice, “Don’t shout, and wave it about ...”

[Tax-chick]

I used to know how to html-code the exclamations, but I forgot.

[moose07]

& # 161

[Tax-chick]

That’s cool!

[HKMk23]

¡Digno eres tu Señor!

[Tax-chick]

Quien vive? Jesus!
Y a su Nombre? Gloria!
Y a su pueblo? Victoria!

[NoCmpromiz]

" & #191; " = ¿

" & #161; " = ¡

(Remove the space after the ampersand.)

[Monkey Face]

All is quiet on the Western front...

The storms have subsided somewhat, but the TV and the phone are still sending me “weather alerts” which I neither want nor need.

(My long hair is making me VERY warm, for reasons that belie the weather.)

I’m sure I will go to bed soon. I just have to decide what to eat before retiring... (h’ep me!)