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21 Office Buzzwords It’s Time to Banish Forever
Edge Media ^ | March 28, 2024 | Sarah Griffin

Posted on 04/21/2024 6:46:48 PM PDT by DoodleBob

Ah, the office – a place where language goes to get dressed in a suit and tie, only to trip over its own shoelaces. Here are 21 phrases that we’ve all heard ad nauseam, and if we’re being honest, wouldn’t miss if they were banished from the corporate lexicon forever:

#1. “Touch Base”

Because nothing says “I don’t actually play baseball” like using a sports metaphor to schedule a meeting.

#2. “Reach Out”

What are we, in a 90s boy band? Just say “I’ll send you an email” and leave the emotional ballads out of it.

#3. “Circle Back”

Less reminiscent of a productive workplace strategy, more an endless loop of doom where nothing ever gets resolved.

#4. “Synergize”

The verbal equivalent of a corporate trust fall. It’s supposed to mean teamwork but sounds more like a new age retreat.

#5. “Think Outside the Box”

If we had a nickel for every time this was said, we could construct a very large, very square box to trap the phrase in forever.

#6. “Leverage”

Originally a physics term, now just a fancy way of saying “use.” Because why use simple words when you can sound like a Wall Street tycoon?

#7. “Paradigm Shift”

Nothing quite like invoking the cosmos to describe changing the office printer.

#8. “Deep Dive”

Not a thrilling ocean adventure, but an overly long meeting about statistics. Bring a snorkel.

#9. “Bandwidth”

Unless you work at NASA, you’re probably just talking about time. Spoiler: nobody’s downloading you.

#10. “Low-Hanging Fruit”

Great for describing apples, less so for the easily achievable tasks that somehow still aren’t done.

#11. “Move the Needle”

Unless we’re all suddenly DJs, can we agree to just say “make progress”?

#12. “Boil the Ocean”

An epic quest to accomplish the impossible, or just corporate speak for trying to do way too much? You decide.

#13. “Take it Offline”

Because apparently, talking in person is now akin to being in airplane mode.

#14. “Win-Win Situation”

A mythical scenario, much like a unicorn, where everyone is happy and nobody’s spreadsheet gets rejected.

15. “On My Radar”

Unless you’re air traffic control, let’s stick to “I’m aware of it.”

#16. “Ping Me”

Not a game of table tennis, just a request for a message. Sadly, paddles are not involved.

#17. “Drill Down”

A phrase that makes you feel like you’re in for some serious dental work, rather than a closer look at the details.

#18. “Game Changer”

Overused to the point of meaninglessness. Changing the game or just changing the PowerPoint template?

#19. “At the End of the Day”

Spoiler: It’s night. Also, a filler phrase that’s the verbal equivalent of shrugging.

#20. “It’s on My Plate”

Because “I’m working on it” wasn’t foodie enough.

#21. “Ecosystem”

Unless we’re discussing the rainforest, can we agree our office plant doesn’t constitute an ecosystem?

So, next time you catch yourself using one of these phrases, take a moment to laugh, then say what you mean. After all, clear communication is the key to success, not the ability to speak in buzzwords.


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Society
KEYWORDS: actually; buzzwords; marchforkarens; touchbase; words
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To: lee martell

Israelis use an expression that means ‘grinding water’.


61 posted on 04/21/2024 7:43:58 PM PDT by jjotto ( Blessed are You LORD, who crushes enemies and subdues the wicked.)
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To: DoodleBob

How about, “...reinvent the wheel...”?


62 posted on 04/21/2024 7:44:03 PM PDT by Tucker39 ("It is impossible so to rightly govern a nation without God and the Bible." George Washington )
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To: ProtectOurFreedom
I’m 73.

So you're the one who came up with, "Let's run it up the flagpole and see who salutes."

Shame, shame...

63 posted on 04/21/2024 7:44:50 PM PDT by IrishPennant (Did Adam and Eve Have Belly Buttons?)
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To: TBP

May I suggest: I get it. I really do. and First a little housekeeping.


64 posted on 04/21/2024 7:45:40 PM PDT by healy61 (.)
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To: Harmless Teddy Bear

Thank you.

I can’t believe I never heard that song or saw the video.

I knew Weird Al was a national treasure.

This song proves he’s a genius.


65 posted on 04/21/2024 7:45:50 PM PDT by DoodleBob (Gravity's waiting period is about 9.8 m/s² )
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To: DoodleBob

None of these bothered me when I was working as much as turning a noun into a verb or vice versa, as in “What’s the ask?” Or “can you whiteboard that?”


66 posted on 04/21/2024 7:46:44 PM PDT by scouter (As for me and my household... We will serve the LORD.)
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To: IrishPennant

LOL!


67 posted on 04/21/2024 7:47:17 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: ProtectOurFreedom
GMTA - and you're right, a few of these are decades old.

Would also add "making the sausage" and "ideate."

68 posted on 04/21/2024 7:48:05 PM PDT by HonkyTonkMan ( )
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To: DoodleBob

.


69 posted on 04/21/2024 7:48:10 PM PDT by sauropod (Ne supra crepidam)
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To: Songcraft

That’s an improvement over what passes for office apparel in some places.

Some folks look like they’re heading to a barbecue.


70 posted on 04/21/2024 7:48:29 PM PDT by DoodleBob (Gravity's waiting period is about 9.8 m/s² )
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To: DoodleBob

Proactive........


71 posted on 04/21/2024 7:48:44 PM PDT by Red Badger (Homeless veterans camp in the streets while illegals are put up in 5 Star hotels....................)
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To: BradyLS; CarolinaPeach

I believe “crack” is slang adapted from England.

It does mean “really good.”


72 posted on 04/21/2024 7:52:34 PM PDT by DoodleBob (Gravity's waiting period is about 9.8 m/s² )
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To: TBP

The whole reason for using these words is that they are so amorphous and weaselly.

They allow one to “pivot” while being able to claim later that is what they wanted to do in the first place.


73 posted on 04/21/2024 7:58:27 PM PDT by glorgau
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To: DoodleBob
Listening to it always made me think of a company I was auditing. I swear at the morning meeting they used every one of those phrases and a few more. And they could not scrap up the money to pay their landscaper.

Since then I have, perhaps unfairly, equated anyone who uses those words with people who may be able to make money but have no control over their spending.

74 posted on 04/21/2024 7:58:40 PM PDT by Harmless Teddy Bear ( Roses are red, Violets are blue, I love being on the government watch list, along with all of you.)
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To: HYPOCRACY
With all the Indians Mike Lee has brought in get ready for

I work for an international chip company. I hear the phrase "Do the needful" regularly. One of the ladies over there calls me "ji" regularly. It turns out, it more or less means "chief". I rather like that one, even though Perry White never did.
75 posted on 04/21/2024 7:59:31 PM PDT by Dr. Sivana
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To: grobdriver
22. "Ask" As in, "I have an ask"

I've found almost without exception the person who asks "what's the ask?" is simply ignorant. They're an actor pretending they know what's going on.

I am grateful they announce their ignorance. I write them off immediately.

76 posted on 04/21/2024 8:00:36 PM PDT by T.B. Yoits
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To: TBP

“The great is the enemy of the good.”

Or vice versa


77 posted on 04/21/2024 8:01:15 PM PDT by Fai Mao (Starve the Beast and steal its food.)
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To: DoodleBob

I don’t watch tv voluntarily but am often subjected to it, and I’ve noticed that people who make a living by talking, talk in chunks. The other day, someone on Fox delivered herself of three trite expressions in one sentence.


78 posted on 04/21/2024 8:05:33 PM PDT by Buttons12 ( )
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To: DoodleBob
#7. “Paradigm Shift”

Nothing quite like invoking the cosmos to describe changing the office printer.


Well, if you are changing it to a PDF system, that might actually be a paradigm shift.

#11. “Move the Needle”

Unless we’re all suddenly DJs, can we agree to just say “make progress”?


I was always under the impression that "move the needle" was more about a seismograph that detects earth shaking movement, rather than a phonograph.

#14. “Win-Win Situation”

A mythical scenario, much like a unicorn, where everyone is happy and nobody’s spreadsheet gets rejected.

Not at all. Both Matt Stafford and Jared Goff benefitted when the Rams traded quarterbacks. That was a win-win. To use a corporate example, "Let's send the hard drives from our decommissioned hard drive storage over to the Altoona office that is running out of disc space".


79 posted on 04/21/2024 8:06:11 PM PDT by Dr. Sivana
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To: T.B. Yoits

“ My bad “ drives me nuts..

……..


80 posted on 04/21/2024 8:09:09 PM PDT by Mears
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