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Jan. 6 Committee Says Cassidy Hutchinson Told Them That She Heard Mark Meadows Say That A Secret Service Agent’s Friend’s Cousin’s Husband Once Heard That One Of Trump’s Other Aides Said She Thinks She Heard Him Say He Wanted To 'Do An Insurrection'
Babylon Bee ^ | 06/29/2022 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 06/29/2022 12:54:18 PM PDT by DFG

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The walls are closing in on former President Trump. In an explosive bombshell unprecedented star witness testimony yesterday, Cassidy Hutchinson told everyone that she heard Mark Meadows say that a Secret Service agent's friend's cousin's husband once heard that one of Trump's other aides said she thinks she heard him say he wanted to "do an insurrection."

"Yes, that's totally what I heard someone say Trump said to someone who told it to them," said Cassidy Hutchinson. "He literally said 'Let's do an insurrection.' And then he threw a plate at the bust of Martin Luther King." Hutchinson then started sobbing uncontrollably.

The committee confirmed that the Secret Service agent's friend's cousin's husband who heard the aide say what she thought she heard is "an upstanding witness of the most unassailable character."

"This is looking really bad," said conservative folk hero Adam Kinzinger. "This might finally be the beginning of the end for Trump, who we are discovering was the evilest president to ever be elected." Kinzinger then started sobbing uncontrollably.

The hearings are expected to heat up even more next week when the committee brings in Johnny Depp to testify - according to sources close to Johnny Depp's agent's cleaning lady's great aunt.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; bidenvoters; hutchinson; j6; jan6; jan6hearsaying; kinzinger; meadows
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To: DFG

If you have an Insurrection that last longer than four hours, seek medical help and next time; take the red pill.


21 posted on 06/29/2022 1:16:01 PM PDT by Islander7 (There is no septic system so vile, so filthy, the left won't drink from to further their agenda.)
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To: DFG

One of the few times the title of the Bee’s article was the definite clue....


22 posted on 06/29/2022 1:17:42 PM PDT by marktwain
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To: Jean2

Well, maybe not salt. That sort of implies they might be useful later on. I’d hate to shake a bit of them on my French fries.

But I just wish they’d get the whole story out there. I heard Trump was killing chickens in the back of the Beast with his bare hands. And what about when he picked his dog up by the ears? And how many times did he really fall off his bike? I’ll bet he skips out on bar tabs? Did he steal Klintons’ furniture from the WH? There’s just gotta be more?


23 posted on 06/29/2022 1:22:54 PM PDT by OldWarBaby
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She might even be Trump’s father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate . . .


24 posted on 06/29/2022 1:23:57 PM PDT by Olog-hai ("No Republican, no matter how liberal, is going to woo a Democratic vote." -- Ronald Reagan, 1960)
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To: DFG

This was priceless.


25 posted on 06/29/2022 1:24:00 PM PDT by sauropod (It's too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy cutting hair.)
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To: DFG

That’s completely bogus. It was the cousin’s wife, not husband. People don’t want to recognize trans women. Typical MAGA freaks!


26 posted on 06/29/2022 1:27:27 PM PDT by ConservativeInPA (Scratch a leftist and you'll find a fascist )
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To: freedomjusticeruleoflaw

Fricckin Ferris


27 posted on 06/29/2022 1:38:34 PM PDT by al baby (Hi Mom Hi Dad)
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To: DFG; Lazamataz
The Bee is a little late on this one - Laz and others were all over this yesterday. Posts 4, 22, 123, 202, 211, 289.
28 posted on 06/29/2022 1:40:33 PM PDT by MikelTackNailer (Fortunately despite aging I've been spared the ravages of maturity.)
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To: rktman

She just got a new lawyer recently. It could be the first one told her to keep her mouth shut because her story was full of holes. The second one pry hates Trump so much that he pushed her to testify, even though her testimony was mostly hearsay.


29 posted on 06/29/2022 1:41:24 PM PDT by Prince of Space (Let’s Go, Brandon! )
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To: DFG

Cassidy sure brought the JSIXER Panties to life yesterday. Federections EVERYWHERE!


30 posted on 06/29/2022 1:55:35 PM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (First, they stole our elections. Then, they stole our country.)
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To: DFG

Another ditzy friggin’ broad.


31 posted on 06/29/2022 1:58:52 PM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (First, they stole our elections. Then, they stole our country.)
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To: DFG

Peach Fo Fi


32 posted on 06/29/2022 1:59:27 PM PDT by bray (The Vax is fake and deadly)
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To: DFG

When did the Bee stop writing satire?


33 posted on 06/29/2022 2:02:49 PM PDT by parmamenian (and so it goes!)
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To: DFG

That dang Bee done stung me again........LOL


34 posted on 06/29/2022 2:06:39 PM PDT by Dawgreg
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To: DFG

I heard it from Amber Heard great grandmother’s gay son’s husband’s adopted son wife’s brother in law’s dry cleaner... 🤓


35 posted on 06/29/2022 2:54:19 PM PDT by Deplorable American1776 (I'm the one trying to save American Democracy...Donald Trump 6/21 at the NCGOP convention! )
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To: Deplorable American1776

Thought it was a Daily Mail Headline.


36 posted on 06/29/2022 2:57:35 PM PDT by JerseyDvl (During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.)
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To: DFG

Cassidy Hutchinson, WRITE a book!


37 posted on 06/29/2022 3:01:39 PM PDT by Mark (Celebrities... is there anything they do not know? Homer Simpson)
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To: DFG

If you are on the side of Hitchinson you are are on the side of Ukraine. You hear that Williams. You traitor. We will be waiting.


38 posted on 06/29/2022 3:37:39 PM PDT by circlecity
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To: DFG

Meadows is a Uniparty snake. Same with Pompeo.


39 posted on 06/29/2022 3:39:20 PM PDT by The Fop (God Bless Donald Trump, Frank Sinatra, Joan Rivers, and the Fightin' Rat Pack Wing of the GOP)
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To: OldWarBaby

Yes, did he steal the B from the keyboards? Did he have sex with that lady Monica Lewinsky with a cigar... 🤓


40 posted on 06/29/2022 3:50:42 PM PDT by Deplorable American1776 (I'm the one trying to save American Democracy...Donald Trump 6/21 at the NCGOP convention! )
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