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Satire: Trump Polling At 100% After Hosts Warn He Would Cancel 'The View'
The Bee ^
| June 19, 2024
| Staff
Posted on 06/19/2024 11:07:43 AM PDT by Navy Patriot
U.S. — Former President Trump has suddenly skyrocketed to 100% in the polls after host Joy Behar warned that Trump would ban The View from television if elected.
"Welp, that does it," said lifetime Democrat Dean Bochner after hearing the news. "I never imagined any scenario where I would punch a ballot for Donald Trump, but here we are."
According to pollsters, Trump now holds a one hundred point lead in every single state since the news broke. "We now project Trump winning literally every single vote in Seattle and San Francisco," said pollster Mark Allen. "Despite millions of voters maintaining strong disagreement with Trump about policy issues, the chance to get The View off the air is simply too good to pass up. It has turned every person in America into a single-issue voter."
In addition to cancelling The View, sources warned that a second Trump term would also lead to the banning of Rachel Maddow. "Whoa, you already sold me on Trump," said previous Biden super-donor Amy Langford. "I'll take that cherry on top right now though. I just had no idea what kind of good that orange man could do for society."
At publishing time, Trump had gained a 100% approval rating world-wide after Keith Olbermann announced he would launch himself into outer space if Trump wins again.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
TOPICS: Front Page News; Government; Political Humor/Cartoons; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; bravo; sacramentobee; theview; trump; whatbee; whichbee
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Finally, President Trump has found the issue that 100% of Americans care most about!
To: Navy Patriot
Bring back Rosie O’Donnell. At least she was funny............
2
posted on
06/19/2024 11:10:19 AM PDT
by
Red Badger
(Homeless veterans camp in the streets while illegals are put up in 5 Star hotels....................)
To: Navy Patriot
To: Navy Patriot
It just couldn’t get any better than this:
During a heated conversation on a public platform, Rob Reiner declared that he would set himself on fire if Trump were to be elected president again.
Got my mallows, Graham and Hersheys ready!
4
posted on
06/19/2024 11:19:17 AM PDT
by
griswold3
(Truth, Beauty and Goodness. )
To: Red Badger
The present cast is unconsciously funny.
5
posted on
06/19/2024 11:20:02 AM PDT
by
Eleutheria5
(Every Goliath has his David. Child in need of a CGM system. https://gofund.me/6452dbf1. )
To: griswold3
I hear tell his head is made of meat;D
6
posted on
06/19/2024 11:22:56 AM PDT
by
Eleutheria5
(Every Goliath has his David. Child in need of a CGM system. https://gofund.me/6452dbf1. )
To: KingofZion
Thanks, King, Breitbart is reporting Behar is being "Mocked Hard".
Well, as long as it's Hard...
7
posted on
06/19/2024 11:23:25 AM PDT
by
Navy Patriot
(Celebrate Decivilization)
To: griswold3
Please, please tell me when and where!
8
posted on
06/19/2024 11:24:24 AM PDT
by
Navy Patriot
(Celebrate Decivilization)
To: Navy Patriot
This is awesome material!
It instantly brought a smile to my face.
Thanks for taking the time to post it.
9
posted on
06/19/2024 11:26:15 AM PDT
by
Freest Republican
(There is no tyranny that cannot be justified by imbeciles)
To: Freest Republican
10
posted on
06/19/2024 11:29:56 AM PDT
by
4Liberty
( Kamala’s relatives owned slaves. )
To: Navy Patriot
11
posted on
06/19/2024 11:33:31 AM PDT
by
Magnum44
(...against all enemies, foreign and domestic... )
To: Freest Republican
12
posted on
06/19/2024 11:38:32 AM PDT
by
Navy Patriot
(Celebrate Decivilization)
To: Magnum44
HERE HE IS GOING OVER THE NOTES OF HER LAST VISIT....
13
posted on
06/19/2024 11:50:17 AM PDT
by
Right Brother
(Pray for God's intervention to stop UMCRevMom's invasion of Free Republic.)
To: griswold3
reiner on fire! he’d burn for hours.
14
posted on
06/19/2024 11:56:10 AM PDT
by
Qwapisking
("IF the Second goes first the First goes second" L.Star )
To: Navy Patriot
I remember reading a story on line, not satire, that “The View” was going to be canceled. Have I ‘mis-remembered’ that?
Of course I’ve seen mention that Whoopi was going to be fired, but that hasn’t happened, and I don’t expect it.
15
posted on
06/19/2024 11:58:14 AM PDT
by
GreyFriar
(Spearhead - 3rd Armored Division 75-78 & 83-87)
To: griswold3; Chode; SkyDancer; Salamander; Carriage Hill; Lockbox; MtnClimber; nascarnation; ...
You might want to think about the toxic chemicals that his burning body would be emitting while on fire. I would think that the chemical taste (possibly like Creosote or burning Railroad Ties) would be pretty nasty, possibly even harmful to the Human Body...
That would make S’mores inedible.
16
posted on
06/19/2024 12:00:38 PM PDT
by
mabarker1
( (Congress- the opposite of PROGRESS!!! A fraud, a hypocrite, a liar. I'm a member of Congress!!!)
To: Navy Patriot
I don’t know who keeps keywording *sacramento bee* in these articles, but it’s The Babylon Bee.
And a fine job on this one.
17
posted on
06/19/2024 12:03:49 PM PDT
by
metmom
(He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus…)
To: metmom
18
posted on
06/19/2024 12:11:01 PM PDT
by
Navy Patriot
(Celebrate Decivilization)
To: Red Badger
19
posted on
06/19/2024 12:19:26 PM PDT
by
Eleutheria5
(Every Goliath has his David. Child in need of a CGM system. https://gofund.me/6452dbf1. )
To: Magnum44
It’s why robotics was invented
20
posted on
06/19/2024 1:18:48 PM PDT
by
Vaduz
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