I wish I had waited

L.A. youth ^ | jan. 2004 | anonymous

[freepatriot32]

I am a 15-year-old girl who’s had sex since the age of 13. There are two main reasons I got into having sex at such an early age. One, I didn’t know much about sex so I wanted to see what it was like. I saw it everywhere from Victoria’s Secret shops to television shows.

Two, I was influenced into having sex because "everybody" in high school was doing it. I was in eighth grade and I hung around people who were older than me. The guys were not virgins. They would say things like, "It is not a big deal." So I thought that if I was not a virgin it would not matter that much because it had lost its specialness.

My parents and teachers were too embarrassed to sit me in a chair and talk to me about sex. My parents thought that I would not become sexually active because my brothers and sisters had not become involved with sex. In my middle school I did not have any sex education classes. At that time I was wondering stuff like, how does it feel to have sex? Do I get pregnant the first time? What is a condom? I once saw a condom on glasses worn by Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes and I wondered what it was.

The first time I had sex, I had to depend on what the guy knew. I was 13 and the guy was my sex education class. He was 16 years old and not my boyfriend. It was his idea to have sex and I was really adventurous at the time. I wanted to know more and it just happened. It was his idea to use a condom because I didn’t know much about birth control. After I had sex, I realized it was too late to take back the biggest mistake of my life. I went home and kept telling myself, "I’m not a virgin, I’m not a virgin." I felt really bad about it because growing up I was taught that you shouldn’t lose your virginity until you’re married.

Months later, when my parents found out that I was having sex, they lost their trust in me and sent me to a group home. But sex is addictive. I became addicted to the feeling of being loved because I wasn’t getting enough love from my family. I began to have sex with people that I really did not want to have sex with. Once I started having sex it was not easy to stop.

I personally believe that middle school is one of the most important places to be given sex education because when you get into high school you will see things about sex everywhere. Nowadays people do not wait to be seniors at the prom to have sex. They just have sex when they think they are ready, whether or not they are.

I wanted to save my virginity for someone special, not just some guy. I think that if I had known more about sex and taken sex-ed classes in middle school, I would have realized that sex is not a game. After the sex-ed classes I took in ninth grade, I learned that there is much more to sex than the "fun" of it. There are sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy, and with those risks comes a lot of responsibility.

In the future, I want to wait to have sex until I meet someone who appreciates me. Sex can bring negative things when you are not ready for it.

[Hillary's Lovely Legs]

#1 no way a kid wrote this. #2 pictures?

What would you like pictures of, a 13 year old girl having sex?

Please enlighten us.

[cyborg]

Once I started having sex it was not easy to stop

*** Er...give me a break. I heard this line (mostly from men) that once you start having sex you'll be a freak, you'll want sex all the time. What a pack of lies that was. Don't ask how I know that either :GRIN:

[FITZ]

I felt really bad about it because growing up I was taught that you shouldn’t lose your virginity until you’re married.

But according to this article --- the parents did talk to her --- told her not to lose her virginity until marriage --- apparently she feels that early sex education --- in elementary school would have told her something other than what her terrible parents did. The incompetent parents obviously were wrong to tell her to wait for marriage.

[Drammach]

Oh yeah, I REALLY believe a kid actually wrote this..

LOL!... my thoughts exactly...
It is the rare 15 year old that can write this good...

[Celtic Conservative]

My mom is a trip. My father 'bless his soul' sat me down once and said, I'll kill you, I'll just kill you if you have sex so don't have any! *LOL*

you got that speech too?. It was My mom , upon dropping me off at my university dorm who said "I love you, study hard, I know you can do it, and if you don't keep it in your pants I'll kill you". My roommates eyes got big as saucers. after they left, he said "was she serious?" . I said "oh yeah, 100%!"

Smart, tough lady, Momma CC

CC

[cyborg]

Well if it's one thing we know, that an interested parent helps!

[Celtic Conservative]

"Well if it's one thing we know, that an interested parent helps!"

very true. What kids need (imo) is a parent who is interested, involved, and willing to be a parent and not a "friend". If you do your job right, the friendship comes later.

CC

[international american]

My dad read me the riot act when I was 16. He told me how cushy my life was(and it was)!! So my choice was a very comfortable existence, or a life of hell on earth. I listened:)

[Publius6961]

Why don't you believe this is a kid?

Because, dear lady, the world is full of controlling twits who, if their "intention" is good, think nothing of making things up. Cute stories about events that "might" have happened, cautionary takes, tearjerking stories, you name it.

Of course, the real world is much more interesting, but they have a mission in life. It's always for a good reason.

[7.62 x 51mm]

Sounds like some heavy editing by an adult. Not enough "I was like"s in it, for today's *youts*.

[uglybiker]

Right. A 15-year-old wrote this. [/sarcasm]

If a 15 year old really had written it, it would look like this:

(translation courtesy of AOLer Translator

I WISH I HAD WATEED IM A 15-YAAR-OLD GIRL WHO’S HAD SEX SINC3 TEH AEG OF 1311!1 WTF THEIR R TWO MANE R3ASONS I GOT IN2 HAVNG SEX AT SUCH AN AARLY AEG!1!!!1 OMG LOL ONE I DIDN’T KNOW MUCH ABOUT SAX SO I WANTED 2 SE WUT IT WAS LIEK11!!! LOL I SAW IT EVERYWH3RA FROM VIC2RIA’S SECRET SHOPS 2 TALEVISION SHOWS11!1!1!1 OMG TWO I WAS INFLU3NCED IN2 HAVNG SAX B/C AV3RYBODY IN HIGH SKOOL WAS DONG IT1!!!! LOL I WAS IN EIGHTH GRAED AND I HUNG AROUND PEOPLA WHO WAR3 OLDAR THAN ME!1!!111 WTF DA GUYS W3R3 NOT VIRGINS111! OMG LOL THAY WUD SAY THNGS LIEK IT IS NOT A BIG D3AL1!1!1! OMG SO I THOUGHT TAHT IF I WAS NOT A VIRGIN IT WUD NOT MATER TAHT MUCH B/C IT HAD LOST ITS SPECIALNES!!1!11!1 OMG MAH PAERNTS AND T3ACHERS WARA 2 3MBARASAD 2 SIT ME IN A CHARE AND TOK 2 M3 ABOUT SEX11!!11 WTF MAH PAERNTS THOUGHT TAHT I WUD NOT BCOMA S3XUALY ACTIEV B/C MAH BROTH3RS AND SISTERS HAD NOT BCOME INVOLV3D WIT S3X1!1!1! IN MAH MIDL3 SKOOL I DID NOT HAEV ANY SEX EDUCATION CLASAS!111! AT TAHT TIEM I WAS WONDERNG STUF LIEK HOW DOAS IT FEL 2 HAEV S3X?!?!!???? WTF DO I GET PR3GNANT TEH FIRST TIEM??!?!?!!! WTF WUT IS A CONDOM?!!!!!? OMG WTF I ONCE SAW A CONDOM ON GLAS3S WORN BY LISA LAFT 3YE LOPES AND I WONDARED WUT IT WAS!!!11! DA FIRST TIEM I HAD SEX I HAD 2 D3PEND ON WT GUY KN3W!!1!! WTF LOL I WAS 13 AND DA GUY WAS MAH S3X EDUCATION CLAS!11!1!11 OMG WTF HE WAS 16 YAARS OLD AND NOT MAH BOYFREIND11111 OMG LOL IT WAS HIS IEDA 2 HAEV SAX AND I WAS RILLY ADVENTUROUS AT DA TIEM!111 WTF I WANTAD 2 KNOW MOR3 AND IT JUST HAP3N3D!111! WTF IT WAS HIS IEDA 2 US3 A CONDOM B/C I DIDN’T KNOW MUCH ABOUT BIRTH CONTROL1!!! WTF LOL AFTAR I HAD SEX I R3ALIEZD IT WAS 2 LAET 2 TAEK BAK TEH BIG3ST MISTAEK OF MAH LIEF!11!1!1! WTF LOL I W3NT HOMA AND KEPT TALNG MYSELF I’M NOT A VIRGIN I’M NOT A VIRGIN!!!!! OMG I FALT RILLY BAD ABOUT IT B/C GROWNG UP I WAS TAUGHT TAHT U SHUDN’T LOSA UR VIRGINITY UNTIL U MAREID!1111! WTF LOL MONTHS L8R WHEN MAH PAERNTS FOUND OUT TAHT I WAS HAVNG S3X THAY LOST THERE TRUST IN M3 AND SENT M3 2 A GROUP HOMA!111!!!1 WTF BUT S3X IS ADICTIEV!!!!1 LOL I BCMA ADICTED 2 DA FELNG OF BNG LOVAD B/C I WASN’T G3TNG ENOUGH LOVE FROM MAH FMILY11!111! OMG I BGAN 2 HAEV SAX WIT P3OPLE TAHT I RILLY DID NOT WANT 2 HAEV SEX WITH1!!1!1 OMG LOL ONCE I START3D HAVNG S3X IT WAS NOT 3ASY 2 S2P!!111 WTF I P3RSONALY BLEIVA TAHT MIDL3 SKOOL IS ON3 OF TEH MOST IMPORTANT PLAECS 2 B GIEVN SAX EDUCATION B/C WHEN U GET IN2 HIGH SKOOL U WIL SE THNGS ABOUT S3X 3VARYWH3RE11!! OMG WTF LOL NOWADAYS PEOPL3 DO NOT WATE 2 B SANIORS AT DA PROM 2 HAEV SEX1!1!111 WTF THAY JUST HAEV SEX WH3N THEY THINK THEY R READY WHETH3R OR NOT THAY AER11!1!1! OMG WTF LOL I WANTED 2 SAEV MAH VIRGINITY FOR SOM3ONE SP3CIAL NOT JUST SOME GUY!1!!!11! LOL I THINK TAHT IF I HAD KNOWN MOR3 ABOUT S3X AND TAEKN SEX-AD CLASES IN MIDL3 SKOOL I WUD HAEV RAALIEZD TAHT S3X IS NOT A GM311!1!1!! WTF AFTAR TEH SAX-AD CLASES I 2K IN NINTH GRAED I L3ARN3D TAHT THEIR IS MUCH MORA 2 S3X THAN DA FUN OF IT11!1!11! OMG WTF THEIR R SAXUALY TRANSMIT3D DIESAESS AND PRAGNANCY AND WIT THOSE RISKS COMES A LOT OF RASPONSIBILITY1!!!!1 IN DA FUTURA I WANT 2 WATE 2 HAEV S3X UNTIL I MET SOMAONA WHO APR3CIAETS ME!!111 OMG WTF LOL SEX CAN BRNG N3GATIEV THNGS WH3N U R NOT READY FOR IT 11!!!11 WTF LOL

[ExSoldier]

"I will assume you don't have in your family, or know of, any intelligent 15 year old girls."

I'm an educator with 15 years experience and a former Teacher of the Year. This, to me, smacks of somebody trying to "sound" like a kid. I have students for which this would be infantile writing. I teach kids who write like Harvard grads, except they're believing Christians, unlike so many from the HAHvad YAHD. I also have many many more who are barely writing on a fourth or fifth grade level, but are placed in their correct age (which is the 9th grade--age 15). Very few kids actually write at their level. It's either above or way below.

[ExSoldier]

"But sex is addictive"

"No its not."

YES IT IS. But not in the same way you're thinking. For a true sex addict, it is a mind numbing experience that takes all the joy out of life and all the heart out of relationships. This "girl" isn't using it in the context of a true sex addict, which is another reason I think this is staged. She is really saying that everybody needs affection and that you can't really live without a tactile touch of somebody who cares or at least pretends to care. She is not describing the release of endorphins at the climax of the sex act. Thinking you need sex three times a day doesn't make you an addict. For sex addicts, their "needs/addiction" can drive them to masturbation on the order of five to eight times an HOUR. But not 24/7. Still, when the urge comes on for a "fix" they will sexually "act out" and their jobs, relationships, community standing will not matter. And nobody understands. Yet this is a burgeoning field of psychology. I just took a class on it to recertify as a teacher. One of the subjects I teach is Psychology.

[tiamat]

FITZ wrote:



But according to this article --- the parents did talk to her --- told her not to lose her virginity until marriage --- apparently she feels that early sex education --- in elementary school would have told her something other than what her terrible parents did. The incompetent parents obviously were wrong to tell her to wait for marriage.

---

Sorry.

" My parents and teachers were too embarrassed to sit me in a chair and talk to me about sex. My parents thought that I would not become sexually active because my brothers and sisters had not become involved with sex. In my middle school I did not have any sex education classes."


Going WITH the theory that this was actually written by a kid, no one has talked to her.

AND there WAS no sex-ed in a Middle School.

[tessalu]

And this stupid 15 year old got published. This is a miracle, nothing short of it!

[af_vet_1981]

This, to me, smacks of somebody trying to "sound" like a kid. I have students for which this would be infantile writing.

Would you bet your house on it ?

[af_vet_1981]

That cut and dried, eh? They reacted to her promiscuity by putting her in a group home, and so now she felt she needed sex more than ever?

Her story is condensed so it is difficult to know the chronology.

IMO, this is bunk written by an adult.

I note you do not support her points and it is your opinion that she is not a teenager.

[ExSoldier]

I don't have to bet my house on it. This is my profession. Are you an educator?

[af_vet_1981]

You claim the name of a professional writer so I suppose you might be more familiar with how often another writer pretends to be someone they are not. I would be interested in your opinion on who authored the NT.

I don't think her age is knowable from the evidence. I think it is her message that is unnerving to some. Who she is we really don't know.

[Guenevere]

#29...Let me clue you in....
..Sex education is ALREADY in elementary schools.....and not just 5th & 6 grades anymore!

Eleven years ago, in our county, hundreds of parents protested the mandate of SexEd in kindergarten through 12th grade....
...with progressive info up the grade ladder.

It was straight from Planned Parenthood!!

This 'writer' is NOT promoting abstinence....

..She, it...him or her.....is promoting sex education via Planned Parenthood....

..which is geared purely TOWARDS having sex!