A Few Of FR's Finest....Every Day....12-02-03...Holiday Contest Thread: Rumsfield Doll

12/02/003 | FreeTheHostages

[FreeTheHostages]

A Few of FR's Finest....Every Day

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HARK! Welcome to a holiday contest thread.

The prize is a talking doll. But wait, it gets better!
	Secretary Rumsfield is doing the talking! Ah, Rummy, he tells it like it is.  Click here to see a sample of things the doll can say!

Santa sees all, knows all.     Cool Christmas gifts for Rumsfield?   You betcha.  But here’s a more perplexing question: Whatever will Rummy get for the press corps?


How does Donald Rumsfield really feel about THEM?  He probably can't say.   The press corps, being the inexperienced, naive, childlike people that they are, may determine how much Rumsfield really loves them by the Christmas gift he gives them.


So, let's do some fictitious shopping for our beloved Secretary of Defense.  Pretend the President has given you leave to get them what you *really* want to get them.  Best answer wins the doll!

Examples of Gifts From Rummy, To Press Corps, With Luv
Recompense for their thoughts	A Texas snowglobe?
A good gift for Sam Donaldson	Remember, it's the thought that counts . . .
Got the idea?  Good.  So it's your turn: what should Secretary Rumsfield get for his beloved crop of youngsters in the Pentagon press room?

The Rules
1. There are no rules! Everything is subject to change on the merest whim. Needless to say, this contest is not affiliated with the ownership of Free Republic and is run by just me.


The Guidelines
1. Post by 22:00 hours (10 p.m. EST --Rumsfield-time!) your description of what Rumsfield should get for the Fourth Estate.  In this fictious gift-giving contest, you can use words, graphics, sounds, and/or an unlimited ficitious budget.  Your contest entry can describe a gift to the entire press corps or you can select one member to receive Sec. Rumsfield’s gift.

2. Winner will be announced on this thread at 23:00 hours.

3. Humor counts.   Conservatism counts.   Picking on the artwork of The Thin Man counts.   In short, everything counts.   Including how much alcohol I have imbibed at the time of judging.   Oh, and if you have to ask if bribes count, then you don't know me well enough to get me the perfect gift anyway.

4. As always, no complaining that the judge (me) is a raving lunatic.   Everyone already knows that.   Bor-r-r-r-ing.   As per last year, no whining if you lose just ‘cause your entry was clearly better: remember, when the judge is an idiot, there’s no shame in losing.   So enter once, enter often, have a ball.

5. The possibility exists of runner-up prizes and awards.   The possibility also exists that if you don’t want a the Rumsfield doll and would prefer a Coulter doll, I just might have access to one for ya.  Or not.  Depends on my mood, really.

6. Don't post anything that our President and First Lady would disapprove of.


7. Oh, and no not entering because you're afraid of embarassing yourself.  That's the entire point of these contests and you'll have plenty of company!  Ho ho ho!





Just in case you're not motivated and somehow have lost the dander you usually put up when you see a member of the press corps, consider the fact that the ne'er-do-wells just yesterday gave TONS of cnn.com frontpage publicity to a "foot-in-mouth" award for Rumsfield given by a couple of unknown British quacks.  Unbelievably, the press corps is riding herd on the theory that the man can't talk no good!  We, on the other hand, understand perfectly this gem:

We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know.   But there are also unknown unknowns -- the ones we don't know we don't know.

It makes perfect sense to everyone except a Liberal and we recognize the Rumsfieldian humor and truth in the statement.  I personally hope this contest has many unknown unknowns!

And Merry Christmas, Secretary Rumsfield!  We understand you and you've been a very good boy this year!

THIS WEEK'S THREADS 12-1-03...Military Monday

Opinions by our own 'King of Ping' The guy's good, folks!

Thanks, Mixer!

1) Click on the graphic to open the Calendar.
2) Once there you can click on any month and even click to the right to go into next year. Once you are in the month that you joined FR you will need to click on the number in the calendar and then an add item screen will come up.
3) In the next box enter your name in the "Calendar Text" field and then click on submit.
4) If any of the screens fail to load simply click on refresh in your browser and that will usually fix it.
5) If all else fails or simply if you want me to do this for you send me a FReepmail and I will gladly do it for you. ~Mixer

Click on the photo to view the album. To
submit your photo, please contact dansangel or .45Man
at
danbh59@yahoo.com
and include Freeper Photo Album in subject line.

[FreeTheHostages]

I think your Freeper island idea is a good one.

Which is your favorite? Please do say.

[deadhead]

Minutegal's seasonal list gave me a good laugh.

[SpookBrat]

A contender? No way! I never win anything. LOL It's been great fun. Wish I had more time to play today. I always enjoy silly threads. Everyone around here is always so clever and fun. You did a good job.

<---click

[FreeTheHostages]

She's currently second in my tentative list. But I'm holding the contest open until 10 pm EST as promised.

[Kirkwood]

Their Christmas gift should be an exclusive one-on one interviews with Saddam, bin Laden, and Arafat. How can they turn that down? Now the gift also includes all expenses paid trip by Egypt Airlines to a secret location where the three will board the jet and everyone will fly off on a special around the world trip. But that's not all! Just as all the reality TV shows now have a twist, on board will be Khaddafy and his select terrorist who will hijack the plane and crash it into the ocean while everyone gets to chant Allah Ackbar!!! Enjoy your present!

[Kirkwood]

Oh, I typed that too fast. Excuse all the typos. I was enjoying the thought of ridding the world of both evil journalists and evil terrorists at the same time.

[Kirkwood]

I really like those cookies! I would like to send them to all my Republican friends! Good entry!!!

[WVNan]

OH NO!!! My birthday? Is it my birthday? Gee whiz I forgot. I have too much to do tomorrow to have a birthday. Forget it Lord, I don't have time to a year older.

[MeekOneGOP]

Thanks ! :O)

San Saba ? Where is that ? Sure, I'll send you some pecans ! ...

[WVNan]

Oh please. I love MinuteGal's parody. I laughed so hard. It is very very clever. So clever in fact that I decided not to enter the contest because I could never be that clever.

[SpookBrat]

My computer is being a rear end tonight. Guess I'll go to bed. San Saba is down by Llano or Fredericksburg.

Here's my last entry. I want a set of these, btw. I think Rummy should give them cards for Christmas, since the are short of a full deck.

[JulieRNR21]

Here's the site that 'custom made' that GWB cookie:

http://www.rollingpinproductions.com/Custom.htm

[WVNan]

Oh, I like that one Spooky. Very good.

[FreeTheHostages]

HARK! THE WINNERS!

Well, the top three are pretty hard to sort. Spookbrat, xp38, and Minute Gal all were just terrific. Their entries are summarized in post 196 in this thread, if you'd like to review. Winners First place goes, in a squeaker with Minute Gal, to Spookbrat. Spookbrat had lots of good entries throughout the post, including most notably the Clinton-less ties and the "How to Lie with Statistics" book, and then post 175, a kind note to a veteran, which counts as a very effective bribe in my book. Second place goes to Minute Gal with her 12 days of Xmas list. What a great list!! THANKS for playing. Third place to xp38 -- the game of clue! Presented simply and clearly with the graphics. This captures Rumsfeld's sense of humor for sure. The Prizes Well, we have 3 prizes and I think the fair thing to do is let the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd place winners pick their prizes from the pool in the order that they one. The pool consists of: a talking Rumsfeld doll, a talking Coulter doll, and -- ta da -- this year's 2003 White House Christmas ornament (a parially handpainted figurine you can see on the White House Historical Association's website, a $16 value). Seriously, spookbrat, Freepmail me which one you want, then Minute Gal can pick from the two remaining, etc. I really do send these prizes out. Honorable Mentions Deadhead, a one-way ticket to Freeper Island. That's the ticket! Thanks for the wine! That put you at the top of the Honorable Mention list. Pippin, you would have been up there too, 'cept you were SO generous to the press! I ultimately decided I just couldn't stomach them having so many gifts! Now, I just HATE ya didn't win, 'cause we're girlfriends, but all I can say is that I have another thread coming up in a couple of weeks that's a contest and I'll remember that I owe ya! Dutchess, with simply, deadly, Rumsfeldian wit, suggests giving them Helen Thomas. And finds this hideous photo that will give us nightmares! LOL. Good show. Jwfiv, bit of an inside joke on The Thin Man, but I'm biting. Yes, the press corps deserves him. And needs him too. JulieRNR21, thanks for reminding us that not all members of the press deserve goal this year! GWB sugar cookies for FOX news and others -- inspired by the holiday spirit. MeeknMing -- OK, shame on me for not putting you higher on the list with the Helen Thomas gag, but some of your byte posts were *very* big and we hostesses have a rule of trying to keep picture posts down below 50,000 -- or lower if you can. I know, sounds like nitpicking, but the competition's fierce so I got to! Your Helen Thomas pic really IS terrific, though! Kirkwood - post 205, "Their Christmas gift should be an exclusive one-on one interviews with Saddam, bin Laden, and Arafat. How can they turn that down? Now the gift also includes all expenses paid trip by Egypt Airlines to a secret location where " ROFL! CONGRATULATIONS SPOOKBRAT!!

[Kirkwood]

Thanks for the cookie link!

[FreeTheHostages]

You've won something! See above post.

[SpookBrat]

Oh...I'm so tired and slow here. I'm behind on the thread. LOL My computer clock is off by 45 minutes. Duh! I'll go look.

[WVNan]

CONGRATULATIONS sPOOKY! yOU WERE BEING VERY CREATIVE TONIGHT. NOW YOU CAN GO TO BED LOL.

[FreeTheHostages]

I just liked your comment about guys and shopping! LOL!!

[FreeTheHostages]

Now, seriously, about your monitor problem . . .

Prices are falling. Have you looked into what Dell will take from you for a new one?