8 Scary Facts About Data Centers

The Bee ^ | May 18, 2026 | The Bee

[dayglored]

(Image Matthew G Eddy / Shutterstock)

AI uses a lot of power, and it needs massive data centers to support it. That's why, despite data centers having existed for decades, people are suddenly running for the hills. But do they have a reason to be afraid? You be the judge.

Here are the scariest facts about data centers:

1. Data centers are the ugliest buildings on earth: Ancient Greeks never built utilitarian buildings.

2. They're almost as bad as nuclear power plants: And 100 times more deadly.

3. They drink up one whole ocean per ChatGPT query: We might need the oceans at some point in the future.

4. They use so much power that everyone nearby is forced to become Amish: And if you're Amish, you won't be allowed to watch Dune: Part Three. Horrifying.

5. Dangerous levels of EMF and radiation can affect human health: Methuselah lived to the age of 969 when there were no data centers around. You think that's just a coincidence?

6. Powering a single data center requires the opening of a Hellmouth: Is that what we really need? More Hellmouths?

7. Data centers are the last step before the vast farms filled with crops of human beings to feed them: You will now be food for the machines.

8. There's one behind you right now: Run! Run for your lives!

Are you frightened? Not nearly frightened enough. What else is scary about data centers?

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TOPICS: Business/Economy; Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; datacenters; satire; scary

[dayglored]

Scared? You should be! Mask Up Now!!

[KingLudd]

If data centers prevent me from having to interact with a real person in customer service anywhere, I’m all for them.

[Dr. Sivana]

Data centers are the ugliest buildings on earth: Ancient Greeks never built utilitarian buildings.

They're almost as bad as nuclear power plants: And 100 times more deadly.

Not true. The Rochester Institute of Technology has the ugliest buldings on earth. Runners up include The Regenstein Library at the University of Chicago, and the Life Sciences Center at Trinity College in Hartford, CT.

[dayglored]

> Data centers are the last step before the vast farms filled with crops of human beings to feed them: You will now be food for the machines.

I figure The Matrix is only a few years away.

[Mariner]

Those who ridicule valid concerns about data center’s resource consumption regional impacts are slow.

Takes ‘em a while to catch on.

[GingisK]

Obama’s library holds that distinction.

[Nervous Tick]

How could you possibly leave the Obeyme pResidential Library and D3atH5tar off the Ugliest Building List??!? 🤣

[Dr. Sivana]

You are right. Appropriate that it is just east of the Regenstein Library.

[Dr. Sivana]

How could you possibly leave the Obeyme pResidential Library and D3atH5tar off the Ugliest Building List??!?

You are right. I only included buildings I experienced in person. Obama's looks like the a Star Wars empire designed grain elevator. The Regenstein only looks like something out of Monolith Monsters. So two of the ugliest buildings in existence are within a short walk of each other.

[bigbob]

Let’s not overlook the Obama Grain Elevator for that honor.

No data centers: no OnlyFans, no YouTube, no cute cat videos..

[no2daylightsavings]

I love how the people online complaining about data centers are complaining on social media which uses...... data centers

[rktman]

Is there a vax available?

[dagunk]

If data centers prevent me from having to interact with a real person in customer service anywhere, I’m all for them.

****************************************

When I was working -

Looking for vendors, the one where a human answered the phone got specified at the top.

One trip down autophone hell was enough to cancel any money saved if you needed anything from them.

[Resolute Conservative]

When they start seeing water shortages for their sports fields, golf courses, watering yards, and parks they will get it.

I will bet the anytime power goes down for storms all the data centers will have power (after their backup generators go down as well) while you freeze or melt.

[fidelis]

I vote for Our Lady of the Angels Cathedral in Los Angeles built by Cardinal Roger Mahoney which replaced the venerable St. Vibiana. And the inside is as monstrous as the outside.

[central_va]

Love human customer service.

[KarlInOhio]

Is there a vax available?

More power for the 11/780!

[MplsSteve]

“I figure The Matrix is only a few years away.”

I was thinking more along the lines of something like SkyNet.

[Dr. Sivana]

I vote for Our Lady of the Angels Cathedral in Los Angeles built by Cardinal Roger Mahoney which replaced the venerable St. Vibiana. And the inside is as monstrous as the outside.

I had forgotten what the outside looked like, but the inside was horrific enough that my old employer paid the Los Angeles Times $300 to get the rights to a photo for a major book release.

[thesligoduffyflynns]

Lake Tahoe must find a new electricity supplier by 2027.

They are being cut off by their current one ( no pun intended) because the new data center needs all it can get.

I d love to post the link but cannot on this device