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10 Irrefutable Signs Trump's Health Is Declining
The Bee ^ | Sep 2, 2025 | The Bee

Posted on 09/03/2025 1:33:13 PM PDT by dayglored

Speculation has been swirling about President Donald Trump's health, with some people even spreading wild rumors that he died over the weekend. What's the real story?

The Babylon Bee has come up with the following list of undeniable signs that Trump's health is going downhill:

  1. Trump has been occasionally posting in lowercase on social media, and his posts have been more coherent: This is not normal.

  2. He is sometimes seen sitting down: A sure sign of failing health. Obviously weak.

  3. He only managed to eat eight Big Macs today: It's like he's slowly fading away.

  4. The man's frickin' 80 or something: Obviously, anyone over 80 years old is at death's door.

  5. Trump shakes hands with nobody, says nonsense, and wanders around aimlessly: Oh, wait, that was the last guy.

  6. He shot a mere 36 on the links this weekend: Sources close to Trump say he's a shadow of his usual 24.

  7. He only works 23 hours a day now: A shocking decline in stamina.

  8. JD Vance beat him at Super Smash Bros. yesterday: This NEVER used to happen. Trump's losing his touch.

  9. He introduced just 68 new tariffs in the last eight hours: This drop in productivity is concerning.

  10. Trump's normally tangerine skin color is slowly fading to a burnt sienna hue: The end is near.

This is terrifying evidence. It's obviously only a matter of time before Trump is out of commission.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Health/Medicine; Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; bruises; health; mentaldecline; satire; trump
The End Is Near!! The Bee says so!
1 posted on 09/03/2025 1:33:13 PM PDT by dayglored
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To: dayglored
JD Vance beat him at Super Smash Bros. yesterday: This NEVER used to happen. Trump's losing his touch.

Ok, now I am worried.

2 posted on 09/03/2025 1:35:35 PM PDT by Harmless Teddy Bear ( Not my circus. Not my monkeys. But I can pick out the clowns at 100 yards.)
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To: dayglored
> ...burnt sienna...

Oh Noez! Burnt sienna!

(What the hell is burnt sienna? I lost my 64-color Crayola box years ago...)

3 posted on 09/03/2025 1:36:39 PM PDT by dayglored (This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalms 118:24)
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To: dayglored

The left are not all in J6 Prison. What Republican president would not do that?


4 posted on 09/03/2025 1:39:14 PM PDT by MtnClimber (For photos of scenery, wildlife and climbing, click on my screen name for my FR home page.)
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To: dayglored
11. It's been two and a half months since the Twelve Day War. How much rest does Trump need before setting back the next nuclear armed enemy? As sure sign of his decline.

5 posted on 09/03/2025 1:41:34 PM PDT by Tell It Right (1 Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: dayglored

...burnt sienna...

Proof positive that one of the writers for the Bee is gay.


6 posted on 09/03/2025 1:45:58 PM PDT by PTBAA
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To: dayglored

I think one decline was left out. He went from a scratch golfer to now with a 1 handicap. Sarcasm


7 posted on 09/03/2025 1:47:10 PM PDT by Son-Joshua ( )
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To: dayglored

Burnt Sienna bed cover.

8 posted on 09/03/2025 1:50:22 PM PDT by Liz (May you be in Heaven half an hour before the devil kno ws you're dead (Irish blessing))
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To: PTBAA
> ...burnt sienna... Proof positive that one of the writers for the Bee is gay.

Even worse would have been "mauve".

9 posted on 09/03/2025 1:50:26 PM PDT by dayglored (This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalms 118:24)
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To: Liz
> Burnt Sienna bed cover.

"...Can't sleep 'cause my bed's on fire..."

-- Psycho Killer, Talking Heads

10 posted on 09/03/2025 1:51:33 PM PDT by dayglored (This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalms 118:24)
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To: dayglored

Oops


11 posted on 09/03/2025 1:52:25 PM PDT by Liz (May you be in Heaven half an hour before the devil kno ws you're dead (Irish blessing))
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To: PTBAA

Or female...


12 posted on 09/03/2025 1:52:52 PM PDT by kosciusko51
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To: Tell It Right
12. He's only reposting Q and Q+ Memes once a month or so now... definitely slowing down...

https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/115119962578158249

13 posted on 09/03/2025 1:53:54 PM PDT by EasySt (Say not this is the truth, but so it seems to me to be, as I see this thing I think I see. #MAGA-A)
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To: dayglored

My brow sweated up over these disclosures...
I’m 14 years older than him and waiting for similar signs of decline...
Although I may have just forgotten that they showed up many years ago...
/s


14 posted on 09/03/2025 1:56:49 PM PDT by SuperLuminal (Where is rabble-rising Sam Adams now that we need him? Is his name Trump, now?)
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To: SuperLuminal
...I'm 14 years older than him and waiting for similar signs of decline...
_______________________

Wow. Happy Birthday. 94 is great. Keep up the good work.
My dad was born 7/14/31. He died in 2020. You are very strong to have bypassed the covid years.

15 posted on 09/03/2025 2:52:37 PM PDT by BarbM (Men who look at porn are impotent for God.)
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To: kosciusko51

Or female...

Could be that.


16 posted on 09/03/2025 3:41:19 PM PDT by PTBAA
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To: BarbM

Hmmm...
They say memory is the second thing to go...
My post proves exactly that: I’m 92... Born in 1933...

I assumed 14 years based on Trump being 78...


17 posted on 09/03/2025 6:23:20 PM PDT by SuperLuminal (Where is rabble-rising Sam Adams now that we need him? Is his name Trump, now?)
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To: SuperLuminal

You are correct. Somebody posted that 80 was old, and I ran with that number.

One time at Mass, my mom asked the usher: John how old are you? Are you 89?

John replied: 89? I wish, I’m 92.


18 posted on 09/03/2025 7:22:27 PM PDT by BarbM (Men who look at porn are impotent for God.)
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