Posted on 06/16/2025 5:23:32 AM PDT by V_TWIN
TEHRAN — Any qualified individuals or eager recent college graduates looking for work in the field of nuclear engineering will be happy to know that there are exciting opportunities that have just recently opened up in Iran.
Suddenly and without warning, multiple exciting positions in the field of nuclear energy research became available, creating opportunities for experienced engineers to step in and start working immediately.
"These vacancies just exploded onto the scene," said one job listing. "All experienced nuclear engineers are encouraged to apply."
Some of the job openings posted in the last 48 hours included:
Enriched Uranium Inspector: A fun, hands-on occupation with room for growth, 30,000,000 IRR monthly (to be paid from pallets of U.S. currency). Knowledge of goat-herding required.
Mostly Peaceful Nuclear Applications Project Lead: A versatile position that offers opportunities in both civilian and military uses — create and destroy! Retail management experience is a plus.
Project Disinformation Coordinator: A creative job that will allow individuals to conceal, deceive, deny, and develop cover stories to keep all project information secret. Minimum five years of experience at a mainstream American media outlet preferred.
Depending on outside circumstances, these positions — and the entire department — may not last long, so interested applicants are encouraged to get in touch as soon as possible.
As with other positions, hatred for Israel and the United States is required. Submit those applications today and start work as early as tomorrow!
Qum on, man!
Employer paid insurance for all your wives and concubine goats.
LOL!!!
Successful applicants first job will be rebuilding the labs ...
Now offering free Iodine tablets! Free dental implants for when your teeth fall out, and free wigs!
“Depending on outside circumstances, these positions — and the entire department — may not last long....”
That parts not satire. 😏
LOL.
But in the absence of proof that the ayatollah is dead - let alone that IDF destroyed anything of substance i.e. the enrichment program - then the joke may well be on us for not getting behind Israel on this (i.e., shoulder to shoulder).
I supported DJT and not returning to neverending wars without a goal but looking weak in the face of adversity must only have an endgame supporting conflict & the status quo. I don’t like it, but there it is.
If left to their own devices, I truly hope that Israel succeeds in stimulating internal Iranian regime change, because it’s the ONLY way to ensure the threat from Iran is eliminated.
The alternative is no joke.
Hunter, you still looking for a job?
I read the headline twice....and laughed. The BEE is right on...
401K Plan? Pension? Life Insurance?..................
Israel stole our nuke tech, right? So maybe the way to quiet the region would be to just take it back from them!
Has to be the best laugh of the week - great way to start!! Thanks.
More like a 401R plan. R as in roentgens
Free Dental for when your teeth fall out?....................
Not in a job that temporary. 😏
That picture is worth the price of admission.
“We’re hiring!”......hilarious.
"It must be more Aladeen!"
Excellent retirement program to include 72 goatish looking virgin women. LOL
BTW, minor point of order:
In the picture, that Borat-looking fellow with the unnaturally long thumbs is dressed after the manner of an Arab, not a Persian.
The Bee needs training in muslim menswear. The guy they show is a Sunni Arab. Iranians dress differently. Fail.
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