Posted on 08/08/2022 10:12:23 AM PDT by servo1969
MOSCOW — A daring attempt by a group of WNBA players to rescue Brittney Griner was foiled when the keys to her prison cell were found to be hanging from a hook ten feet off the ground.
"Is this thing regulation?" said a frustrated Dearica Hamby as she jumped over and over in vain. "Ugh, it's so high! I knew we should have brought the mascot with his trampoline!"
The players hatched the plan for a raid after learning of Griner's nine-year prison sentence. "It's absolutely asinine that Brittney should serve jail time for drug possession. I mean sure, we do the exact same thing here in America, but that's no excuse," said coach Becky Hammon. "If Russia won't do the right thing and use Brittney to secure the release of a notorious arms dealer, then we're going in to get her!"
The WNBA players found gaining access to the jail far easier than anticipated. "Frankly, no one seemed to notice us whatsoever," said Ms. Hamby. "It was eerily like playing in a WNBA game. Everything with our plan seemed on track until we ran into that ten-foot-tall key hook. Those darn Ruskies were ready for us."
At publishing time, the players were planning another attempt with three WNBA players stacked on top of one another in a trench coat.
Sick burn.
Epic trolling.
MOSCOW — A daring attempt by a group of WNBA players to rescue Brittney Griner was foiled when the keys to her prison cell were found to be hanging from a hook ten feet off the ground.
"Is this thing regulation?" said a frustrated Dearica Hamby as she jumped over and over in vain.
slam dunk...
Very funny, girls can’t dunk, and nobody cares about the games.....except the “rough girls” and their lipstick lovers...
Funny. But it should have been 11 feet. I’m sure lots of WNBA players can get up to 10 ft. Eleven feet is a different story.
Now that's just mean. LOL!
I was channel surfing Sunday afternoon and saw the WNBA.
After less than a minute, it was clear an average boys Junior High team had far more ability and would crush those homos.
In fact, their ability was closer to a playground group of 10 year old boys. Maybe.
Of course, without a biologist they might not know who lifts whom.
Fantabulous!
“At publishing time, the players were planning another attempt with three WNBA players stacked on top of one another in a trench coat.”
ROFLMAO! They must’ve seen that in a cartoon, LOL!
Man, I LOVE The Bee! :)
wow
The Bee, more accurate that ever!
"The WNBA officially expanded to ten teams this week, adding franchises in Detroit and Washington, D. C. But before you get too excited about the new additions to the league, remember: all of the players are still women."
More Norm:
“After closing out a successful first season, the WNBA is considering several changes to improve the level of play in the league next year. Among the proposals: extending the playoffs, increasing salaries, bringing back the three-point line, and replacing all the female players with guys.”
"Oh, Google!"
Norm MacDonald and Phil Hartman, two of the greatest!
Brittany Griner’s a man, baby.
I’m surprised anyone heard of Griner, much less earning the attention of the bee. I recall listening to Nate on CBS Mornings explain with sorrow and held back tears saying she would never get any attention because she is a Black Lesbian. He sure upped his credibility with that prediction.
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