Posted on 08/22/2021 11:31:13 AM PDT by sodpoodle
I was standing at the bar at the Legion post one night minding my own business when this FAT ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my behind, and said, "You're kinda cute. You gotta phone number? I said, "Yeah, you gotta pen?" She said, "Yeah, I got a pen". I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you." Cost me 6 stitches...but When you're over seventy.............who cares?
I went to the drug store and told the clerk ... "Give me 3 packets of condoms, please." Lady Clerk: "Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?"; I said "Nah...She's pretty good lookin'..." When you're over seventy............who cares?
I was talking to a young woman at the Legion last night. She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave, and got your hair cut, you'd look all right." I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you."; Cost me a fat lip, but... When you're over seventy............who cares?
I was telling a woman in the Club about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her breasts. "Really," she said, "Go on then... try." After about thirty seconds of fondling she began to lose patience and said, "Come on, what day was I born?" I said, "Yesterday." Cost me a kick in the groin, but... When you're over seventy.............who cares?
I got caught taking a pee in the swimming pool today. The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in. When you're over seventy.............who cares?
I went to our Legion last night and saw a BIG woman dancing on a table. I said, "Good legs." The girl giggled and said, "Do you really think so?" I said, "Definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now. When you're over seventy.............who cares!
I probably sent this to you before. When you're over seventy............. WHO CARES??!!!
This borders on misogyny!
But when you’re over seventy...
Hell, I’m over 70 and I don’t even know what misogyny is, don’t care either.
Thank you for the laugh. We need more these days.
I sure don’t care! lol
TOTGAF!
That’s a big 10-4, good buddy!
True story...My dad who was 60 at the time walking through the airport with my HOT 45 year old step mom... I was 40 at the time... They were bringing my Grandpa Joe (90 year old WWII VET, god rest his soul) out for an event we were hosting.
In the airport, Granpa Joe is lagging well behind as they walk through the terminal. Dad looks back to Joe and says really loud, because of the distance and Grandpa Joe’s hearing problems, “Joe are you coming?” Grandpa replies just as loud because he can’t hear and there is a long distance. “No, just breathing heavy.” Grandpa Joe... miss him every day.
There are never any women at our Legion Post - except for Bingo and Fish Frys.
I’m only 61. But I don’t care anyway. See my tagline.
Bumping the 70+ crowd of which I’m a part.
Those are unusual names - I thought they were always named Bubbles and Trixie.
Loved it. Thank you!
Dr. Ezekiel Emmanuel, health care adviser to Obama and Democrats believes that you should be allowed to die at age 75 and up if you were to contract a serious illness.
This will save precious medical resources and money for healthcare for the rest of the population (including Medicare and Medicaid ).
I’m over 70. Guess I need to renew my American Legion membership. But then, who cares?
Be there in a couple years, 70 that is, already got the attitude.
Very funny, Sod old Buddy!
This is gol dang funny. I don’t care who you are. It seems wasted on the internet. If the author was more clever, he would have taken that routine to the stage, and tuned it into a TV deal. But I guess he’s over 70, so he didn’t care.
Remember what Clint taught us.......
Don’t let the old man in
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