Skip to comments.SATIRE Hick Farmers Retaliate Against Coastal Elites By Withholding Ingredients Needed To Make Avocado Toast
Posted on 02/19/2020 7:09:19 PM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
U.S.Farmers have long been looked down upon by coastal elites, and now the farmers are finally getting their revenge: the "redneck hicks" all around the country have announced they will not be shipping the ingredients needed to make avocado toast to major liberal cities like New York and Los Angeles.
"Until further notice, you'll have to farm your own wheat and grow your own avocados," a spokesperson for America's farmers said as he chewed on a stalk of Timothy grass and did other stereotypical farmer things. "Have fun! Yeehaw!"
Avocado farmers in rural parts of Florida and California reminded city dwellers just how juicy and delicious their avocados are. "Man, these are just perfect -- would go great on a nice, warm piece of toast. It would be a real shame if I didn't ship these to the cities, since I'm just a hick farmer and all."
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
The MOST trusted name in news.
Satire but the blue city nannies like Doomberg and San Fran Nanzi better stop biting the hands that feed them.
Avocado toast ?
Sounds like a fag version of sh!t on a shingle.
This is one life-long city slicker (suburbs,actually) who admires and respects American farmers...particularly since having seen African poverty and hunger up close and personal.
You don't have to have a lot of gray matter to figure out how to do that. You dig a hole, you put a seed in, you put dirt on top, add water, up come the wheat and avocado trees.
It would be nice if farmers refused to sell any of their products in NYC for one month - long enough for New Yorkers to understand that all food in NYC is shipped in from the outside.
Well, those coastal elites can just dig a hole, drop in a seed, cover it and water it.
I understand this is a good time of year to do that, especially in New York.
Yeah but them wheat trees are mighty flimsy.
There used to be farming in NYC. I think there are a few still on Staten Island which is an official borough.
QUESTION: “Who grows what you eat?”
LEFTIST: “Whole Foods, of course!”
It’s quite tasty, you get your veggies, salsa and have it served on whole grain bread....yummy
I live in Nebraska and I love avocadoes on toast, and on Ritz crackers.
(oh cr*p, I spelled avocado plural with an ‘e’. There goes my political career. Back to coding I guess.)
My dad was a prison guard and one day, an inmate had an issue with the beef he was served so dad asked him where he thought hamburger came from.
Inmate said “Grocery store”.
So dad asked where the hamburger was *before* it got to the grocery store.
Inmate thinks hard and says “A warehouse?”
This is the prison that *used* to have the inmates raise and slaughter their own beef cows.
I understand this is a good time of year to do that, especially in New York."
LOL .... those elite are just going to have to rely on their 'superior' GRAY MATTER.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.