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CNN Uncovers Evidence Hero Dog Sniffed Dozens Of Butts Back In College (babylonBee)
Babylon Bee ^ | October 28th, 2019 | staff

Posted on 10/28/2019 8:47:30 PM PDT by Rebelbase

U.S.—Everyone praised the classified "Hero Dog" for taking down ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi.

Everyone, that is, except CNN, who quickly searched through the dog's internet history and college yearbooks. Sure enough, CNN found a picture of the Hero Dog partying at obedience school. In the picture, the dog is seen sniffing a butt without consent.

"Oh yeah, good old [redacted]? He was nuts!" said one German Shepherd who attended Old Yaler Obedience School with the hero dog, according to a CNN report. "He was always sniffing any butt he could find. Cats, dogs, humans, you name it. He didn't have a preference. He identified as pansniffual."

Troubling reports from classmates indicate that the dog sniffed all these butts without consent. The dog wrote cryptic things in his college yearbook, apparently referring to different butt-sniffing maneuvers such as the Surprise Sniffarooski and the Canine's Triangle.

The dog has issued a statement: "I like butts. I've always liked butts. I still like butts, but I never sniff butts to the point of excess. Who's a good boy? I am."

Democrats immediately called for the dog to be court-martialed and for the death of Baghdadi to be overturned


TOPICS: Military/Veterans; Pets/Animals
KEYWORDS: abubakralbaghdadi; albaghdadi; babylonbee; hebloweduprealgood; humor; isis; parody; satire; satireduh; susanrice
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To: Rebelbase

LMAO!!


21 posted on 10/29/2019 1:34:20 AM PDT by ScottinVA (Every liberal should be red-flagged.)
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To: Rebelbase

So what?


22 posted on 10/29/2019 2:16:26 AM PDT by Terry L Smith (.)
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To: Rebelbase

Which leads to a good experienced back ground . He sniffed out the biggest piece of stinking sh## when he found bag daddy


23 posted on 10/29/2019 2:21:12 AM PDT by ronnie raygun (nic dip.com)
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To: Equine1952
I laughed quite a bit at the original article, and I laughed even more at your little bon mot. :-)

Sniff a flower, no one calls you flowersniffer. Sniff one little butt, and you’re a buttsniffer the rest of your life. :)

24 posted on 10/29/2019 3:12:47 AM PDT by Sarcasm Factory (Being a friend of the Clintons is like being bosom buddies with a great white shark.)
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To: KevinB
"Old Yaler Obedience School"

It is!

Thanks, I buzzed right over it.

25 posted on 10/29/2019 5:09:08 AM PDT by MV=PY (The Magic Question: Who's paying for it?)
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To: Equine1952

CNN MUST HAVE FOUND SOME VERY RESTRICTIVE LAWS REGARDING DOGS SNIFFING DERRIERES.


26 posted on 10/29/2019 5:28:52 AM PDT by chopperk (ms)
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To: ronnie raygun

Buttsniffing: the ultimate background check.


27 posted on 10/29/2019 5:40:10 AM PDT by JusPasenThru (Phuque all Democrats.)
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To: JusPasenThru

It’s how dogs send email.


28 posted on 10/29/2019 6:48:46 AM PDT by Rebelbase
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