Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Description and Primary Mission of The USS Obama
Free Republic ^ | 8 January 2017 | Windy

Posted on 01/08/2017 11:45:46 AM PST by Windflier

Describe the USS Obama.

Describe its primary mission.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor; Military/Veterans
KEYWORDS: freepun; garbagescow; obama
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-2021-4041-6061-77 next last
To: Windflier

The Voice, off screen: “Your Mission, if you choose to accept it: Expand the power of Saudia Arabia and Sunni Muslims everywhere.”

Obama: “How much does it pay?”

The Voice: “You will be richer than the Clinton Foundation if you are successful.”

Obama: “I’ll take it. What do I do next?”

The Voice: “We will enroll you in Columbia University and will start working on a Birth Certificate for you. You just need to lay low for a couple of years.”

Obama: “Its a deal.”


21 posted on 01/08/2017 12:08:45 PM PST by InterceptPoint (Ted, you finally endorsed. About time.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Windflier

A yacht looking boat trimmed in pink with lace paying friendly port calls to places like Provincetown, RI, Fire Island, NY, Key West, FL, and San Francisco, CA..


22 posted on 01/08/2017 12:10:28 PM PST by cardinal4 ("Sat stonefaced while the building burned..")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: outofsalt

One interesting fact about the USS Obama, is that we’ll never know who built it, or where it came from.

Also, the helm will only turn left.


23 posted on 01/08/2017 12:11:51 PM PST by Windflier (Pitchforks and torches ripen on the vine. Left too long, they become black rifles.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 13 | View Replies]

To: Windflier

To follow the rear of the USS Milk.


24 posted on 01/08/2017 12:13:36 PM PST by Organic Panic (Rich White Man Evicts Poor Black Family From Public Housing - MSNBCPBSCNNNYTABC)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: cardinal4
A yacht looking boat trimmed in pink with lace...

With a sign prominently displayed, that says, "Enter At Rear".

25 posted on 01/08/2017 12:17:35 PM PST by Windflier (Pitchforks and torches ripen on the vine. Left too long, they become black rifles.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 22 | View Replies]

To: Windflier

USS 0Bama
(Click The Pic)

26 posted on 01/08/2017 12:18:15 PM PST by Fiddlstix (Warning! This Is A Subliminal Tagline! Read it at your own risk!(Presented by TagLines R US))
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Windflier
Description and Primary Mission of The USS Obama

I know its supposed to be a boat, but I picture a dope on a girl's bicycle continually crashing into a brick wall and getting nowhere or accomplishing anything except wrecking the bicycle.

27 posted on 01/08/2017 12:18:16 PM PST by GoldenPup
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Windflier

The first ever ship without a rudder.


28 posted on 01/08/2017 12:20:01 PM PST by Huskrrrr
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Windflier

I like the concept, but is it a good idea to put US before that jerk’s name?


29 posted on 01/08/2017 12:20:19 PM PST by Bigg Red (To Thee, O Lord, I lift my soul. Thank you for saving our Republic.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Windflier
The primary mission of the USS Obama is to look good and to be absolutely worthless. This vessel is much more of a danger to its crew than any of it professed enemies. Its guns always misfire and its missiles always seem to hit its allies and hospitals. Not only does its radar not show incoming enemy missiles or ships it actually shows ghost signals that confuse its crew. The heads of this scow do not work and it always reeks of dead meat and rotten cabbage no matter how much it is cleaned. The majority of the unfortunate crew says that the ship's motto is “You can't polish a turd!” While the minority says it's motto is “The turd in your punchbowl” but they were slightly outvoted. The crew is constantly forced to run around doing nothing of importance and to repeat slogans like “Diversity is strength”, “Leading from behind”, or “This tax will save me money” or some other such nonsense.

The officers of the ship are incompetent with their only qualifications are being either perverted, female, black, brown, foreign born, or preferably, all five. The captain, who makes every excuse for his deathtrap vessel and exhibits incompetence to the highest degree, goes by the nicknames “Cobb Gobbler”, “Deep Throat”, or “Bottom Boy”.

The ship's final day was when the crew mutinied, scuttled the ship in the Syria port of Tartus, shot the officers, and went on to kill jihadis by the thousands.

30 posted on 01/08/2017 12:21:31 PM PST by WMarshal ( Schadenfreude, it feels so good!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Windflier

That’s not right!

Could be the ISIS flag.


31 posted on 01/08/2017 12:21:33 PM PST by dp0622 (The only thing an upper crust conservative hates more than a liberal is a middle class conservative)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: dirtboy

To sail around New Jersey watching whales and declaring the world as having been conquered.


32 posted on 01/08/2017 12:24:57 PM PST by BoomerBill (Keep America beautiful - deport a liberal.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: delete306
To serve as a tug for the USS Reggie Love

Hilarious! It's funny because it's true.
33 posted on 01/08/2017 12:32:54 PM PST by WMarshal ( Schadenfreude, it feels so good!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: Bigg Red
I like the concept, but is it a good idea to put US before that jerk’s name?

Of course not. We wouldn't like it, but other U.S. presidents have had Navy vessels named after them.

I have a feeling that Obama would turn down the offer anyway.

34 posted on 01/08/2017 12:36:43 PM PST by Windflier (Pitchforks and torches ripen on the vine. Left too long, they become black rifles.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 29 | View Replies]

To: WMarshal

As long as the oiler USS Harvey Milk helps them out.


35 posted on 01/08/2017 12:36:52 PM PST by jjotto ("Ya could look it up!")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 33 | View Replies]

To: Windflier
The primary mission of the USS Obama would be:
White (or rainbow) flag deployment, transport of illegal aliens into U.S. ports, and assisting Greenpeace to save the whales in a carbon neutral manner.

You FORGOT the "bending over" exercise.

36 posted on 01/08/2017 12:40:32 PM PST by cloudmountain
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: dirtboy

Garbage Scow.


37 posted on 01/08/2017 12:41:01 PM PST by gigster (Cogito, Ergo, Ronaldus Magnus Conservatus)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: dp0622
Could be the ISIS flag.

I'm sure the USS Obama will fly that one at half staff every time a major terrorist is killed.

38 posted on 01/08/2017 12:41:03 PM PST by Windflier (Pitchforks and torches ripen on the vine. Left too long, they become black rifles.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 31 | View Replies]

To: Fiddlstix

Lol. GOOD ONE!


39 posted on 01/08/2017 12:41:04 PM PST by cloudmountain
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 26 | View Replies]

To: BoomerBill
Just NJ? What about the other 57 states?

I wonder what the ship launching ceremony will be like? (I mean, other than Zero lecturing the shipyard workers: "You didn't build that")

40 posted on 01/08/2017 12:44:57 PM PST by CardCarryingMember.VastRightWC (Folks ask about my politics. I say: I dont belong to any organized political party. I'm a Republican)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 32 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-2021-4041-6061-77 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson