Description and Primary Mission of The USS Obama

Free Republic ^ | 8 January 2017 | Windy

[Windflier]

Describe the USS Obama.

Describe its primary mission.

[InterceptPoint]

The Voice, off screen: “Your Mission, if you choose to accept it: Expand the power of Saudia Arabia and Sunni Muslims everywhere.”

Obama: “How much does it pay?”

The Voice: “You will be richer than the Clinton Foundation if you are successful.”

Obama: “I’ll take it. What do I do next?”

The Voice: “We will enroll you in Columbia University and will start working on a Birth Certificate for you. You just need to lay low for a couple of years.”

Obama: “Its a deal.”

[cardinal4]

A yacht looking boat trimmed in pink with lace paying friendly port calls to places like Provincetown, RI, Fire Island, NY, Key West, FL, and San Francisco, CA..

[Windflier]

One interesting fact about the USS Obama, is that we’ll never know who built it, or where it came from.

Also, the helm will only turn left.

[Organic Panic]

To follow the rear of the USS Milk.

[Windflier]

A yacht looking boat trimmed in pink with lace...

With a sign prominently displayed, that says, "Enter At Rear".

[Fiddlstix]

USS 0Bama
(Click The Pic)

[GoldenPup]

Description and Primary Mission of The USS Obama

I know its supposed to be a boat, but I picture a dope on a girl's bicycle continually crashing into a brick wall and getting nowhere or accomplishing anything except wrecking the bicycle.

[Huskrrrr]

The first ever ship without a rudder.

[Bigg Red]

I like the concept, but is it a good idea to put US before that jerk’s name?

[WMarshal]

The primary mission of the USS Obama is to look good and to be absolutely worthless. This vessel is much more of a danger to its crew than any of it professed enemies. Its guns always misfire and its missiles always seem to hit its allies and hospitals. Not only does its radar not show incoming enemy missiles or ships it actually shows ghost signals that confuse its crew. The heads of this scow do not work and it always reeks of dead meat and rotten cabbage no matter how much it is cleaned. The majority of the unfortunate crew says that the ship's motto is “You can't polish a turd!” While the minority says it's motto is “The turd in your punchbowl” but they were slightly outvoted. The crew is constantly forced to run around doing nothing of importance and to repeat slogans like “Diversity is strength”, “Leading from behind”, or “This tax will save me money” or some other such nonsense.

The officers of the ship are incompetent with their only qualifications are being either perverted, female, black, brown, foreign born, or preferably, all five. The captain, who makes every excuse for his deathtrap vessel and exhibits incompetence to the highest degree, goes by the nicknames “Cobb Gobbler”, “Deep Throat”, or “Bottom Boy”.

The ship's final day was when the crew mutinied, scuttled the ship in the Syria port of Tartus, shot the officers, and went on to kill jihadis by the thousands.

[dp0622]

That’s not right!

Could be the ISIS flag.

[BoomerBill]

To sail around New Jersey watching whales and declaring the world as having been conquered.

[WMarshal]

To serve as a tug for the USS Reggie Love

Hilarious! It's funny because it's true.

[Windflier]

I like the concept, but is it a good idea to put US before that jerk’s name?

Of course not. We wouldn't like it, but other U.S. presidents have had Navy vessels named after them.

I have a feeling that Obama would turn down the offer anyway.

[jjotto]

As long as the oiler USS Harvey Milk helps them out.

[cloudmountain]

The primary mission of the USS Obama would be:
White (or rainbow) flag deployment, transport of illegal aliens into U.S. ports, and assisting Greenpeace to save the whales in a carbon neutral manner.

You FORGOT the "bending over" exercise.

[gigster]

Garbage Scow.

[Windflier]

Could be the ISIS flag.

I'm sure the USS Obama will fly that one at half staff every time a major terrorist is killed.

[cloudmountain]

Lol. GOOD ONE!

[CardCarryingMember.VastRightWC]

Just NJ? What about the other 57 states?

I wonder what the ship launching ceremony will be like? (I mean, other than Zero lecturing the shipyard workers: "You didn't build that")