Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
This is the third year in a row I don’t owe anything but I get nothing back.
I want a new Cyndi album too. I have her first one!
Mmmmmmm. Looks yummy.
My mother says she is too old to make. I’m hoping this weekend when my sister comes from Manhattan to visit she will have some.
I heard she’s bring breakfast goodies from Greengrass......yum.....
According to Amazon, Cyndi’s new album comes out in the middle of May.
according to the good fairy, you will be getting a copy the day it comes out.
The Floof is Out There!
Good morning!
This self-satisfied tabby lives in Norway.
The floof is strong today.
Come visit me! I just made a pot of coffee. I love potato pancakes.
I don’t like gefilte fish. My kitties liked it though.
I just met up with a couple of FReepers this last weekend, and it will be fun to meet up with you, as well! I am looking forward to it! :o])
Libre ou mort is in AZ, but I’m not sure how far she is from Phoenix, but she is, obviously, much closer to where you will be!
All the albums of Cyndi’s that I had were cassette tapes, so I would like to get them replaced. At least the ones that have “I’m Headed West,” on them. ;o]
I love her voice!
Oh, my!
That good fairy needs a humungous hug!!! Thanks, Good Fairy, wherever you are!! It will be just in time for my birthday!! YAY!!! <3
Oh, that is so very true!!
We’re fasting today. No meat, and (in effect) nibble some leftovers if your other choice is passing out. Back in the day, ‘long about 1992, I could fast for three days and then sing a 4-hour Mass, but age has taken its toll.
I often ask that when I’m out in public...
I didn’t want to get up today, but I was awake, so here I am.
And a chilly me I is, too. At the moment, it’s 60 degrees, with the wind from the west @ 4 mph and 17%. Inside, Galileo says it’s 74, but that’s on the cool side for me. It seems my legs are cold most of the day so when I get into bed, the heat feels marvelous.
Anyway, I’m wearing a fleece vest while I sit here. It’s keeping me warm, so my fingers can function.
Potato pancakes look very good!! Good morning, Covenantor!
Blessed Good Friday.
Be careful with fasting. Fainting is no good.
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